Why Women Do Not Leave The Abuser

Women are conflicted over the difficult decision to choose leave or stay with their abuser because of children, finances and the overwhelming fear for their lives. Love should never make a person feel trapped, hurt or leave

The cycle of abuse starts when an individual is abused and then the perpetrator feels regret. The guilt leads the perpetrator to ask for forgiveness and engages in positive behavior towards the victim. The victim does not leave the abuse because he/she “perceives few options and feels anxious terminating the relationship with the abusive partner, feels hopes for the relationship at the contriteness of the abuser and does not call the police or file charges.” In addition, after the victim forgives the perpetrator the couples experiences a honeymoon stage. During the honeymoon, stage the victim is optimistic about the relationship’s nonabusive future. After the honeymoon

Those who are abused fear what will happen to them once they leave, and they have probably already been threatened with what will happen if they do. Women are often embarrassed of themselves. Abusive relationships are immediately judged, and peoples’ lack of understanding could lead the abused to believe they did something wrong by being involved in the

Women will continue to suffer from domestic violence unless there is some sort of intervention to help them. When dealing with this population, it is essential to create a safe environment where the woman can talk freely about the abuse without any retaliation from the abuser. When someone comes into a therapeutic session, everyone deserves to be treated with respect and care. This in turn will create a sense of hope that a different type of life can be possible. Also, knowing that there is a support system can help the woman begin the process of change. Despite this, the process of leaving the abusive partner is slow (Warshaw, n.d.)

Every choice that an abused woman considers to do with regards in seeking help or ending the relationship involves a variety of risks. Time and time again, the common question arises, “why doesn’t she just leave?” Most often abused women, at great and potentially fatal risk, do leave their abusive relationships. However, there is a multitude of barriers, including increasing abuse and the potential for re-victimization by the system that does not respond accordingly, and most often force many women to return to their abusers. A woman may become vulnerable as she goes through the stages of leaving her abuser. There are many reasons why a woman becomes vulnerable; guilt, denial, and fear may be among a few reasons, though no matter what the

Some women take the position that “hope springs eternal” for people in love and they shouldn’t be held accountable for the abusive spousal choices they make. That is precisely the kind of romantic notion that men and women cling to and use to seduce them into staying in relationships in which there is abundant evidence that they should leave. Often friends and parents try to intervene but when “hope springs eternal” obvious dangers are overlooked, denied and women tell themselves something like, “If I just love him enough, he’ll change.” Battered men usually say exactly the same things. “What is needed in situations of verbal and physical abuse and danger is not romantic fantasy but a critical and self-protective assessment of the facts followed by a decision based on those facts”(Walker 17).

In addition to all these reasons to why women stay in abusive relationships, is because women lose their self-esteem and eventually don’t have the energy to leave.

The most profound assistance we can give to someone in any situation is education. As stated previously those who are uneducated on what exactly domestic abuse is and how it will affect them are more likely to stay in the abusive relationship than those who are educated beforehand. Many schools; and even outside of school programs offer sex education classes. These programs teach our teens about protecting themselves and making smart decisions when where their sexuality is concerned. If our schools teach young adults about protecting themselves sexually why not teach them to protect themselves physically

I agree women stay in abusive relationships for a variety of reasons. Women dealing with abuse as you stated handle the situation differently. Some women are strong enough to walk away from an abusive relationship without any concern of backlash from their abuser and this is usually true for women who endured the abuse for a short period of time. Whereas, women who have lived a long term life of abuse are the ones who struggle most with leaving their abuser. They are the ones that burden themselves with the shame, fear, and the worry that without their abuser, they will not make it. The more women are empowered the slimmer chances of then accepting the life of the

Most women stay in abusive relationships because sometimes since it's not physical they think that it's not as bad since there no violence involved. Also, it's hard for some women to leave because their partners have a tendency to manipulate their mind's into thinking that this is all they can get or deserve. They degrade their self-worth. They also think that after a while that the circumstance of the situation will change. Also,victims tend to find excuses for the abusers; but in reality, THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR ABUSE!

I felt intrigued by this article titled Reasons for Staying in Intimately Violent Relationships: Comparisons of Men and Women and Messages Communicated to Self and Others, writing by Jessica J. Eckstein. This fascinating article was published on the Springer Science Business Media journal, on October 27th 2010. It has come to one’s attention to understand why some people, either male or female where to stay in an abusive relationship.

One can only imagine how uncomfortable the lives of women who are experiencing or have previously experienced domestic violence is. Can you imagine, living every day in constant fear that today might be your last? That today could be the day that your abuser finally snaps, and life as you know it is over in the blink of an eye as you are trying to dodge that punch to your precious temple. Domestic violence was defined as an assault, threat, or intimidation by a male partner. (Abbott, Johnson, Koziol-McLain, & Lowenstein, 1995) Every year an estimated 2 million to 4 million woman in the United States are reportedly abused by their alleged male partners. Many of these women are ruthlessly physically assaulted, and thousands end up losing their life to the battle. (www.mayoclinic.com). These such statistics are flabbergasting. Many are under the impression that Domestic abuse only appears through physical violence – a fight of some sorts, but it is in fact prevalent in psychological abuse as well. Domestic violence occurs in several various unfortunate ways, such as verbally, mentally, and physically. Domestic violence is a widely spread issue throughout the United States. It is unfortunate that women are still being seen as inferior in comparison to men in today’s society. Women on average make only 77 cents to every dollar earned by men working in the same position. (Glynn, 2013) It is evident that men do also experience Domestic violence, but

I agree women who are victim of domestic abuse continue living through the turmoil because they don’t believe their isn’t another option. Some women that live through that situation are sometimes victim of abuse from when they children, so this behavior is normal and they don’t deem the abuse as wrong, but rather the norm. It even become tougher for women to leave their abuser, especially when children are involved. Children becomes the catalyst to why some women stay with their abuser, but these women don’t realize it is better to leave abuser than let their children grow-up living in a home were abuse is the norm.

Every year in the United States, One in four women are victims of the domestic violence; however, this is only based on what has been reported to the department of justice (Stahly 2008). While men are also victims of domestic violence, women are more often the victims. Moreover, 90% of domestic violence is male initiated. In severe cases domestic violence ends with victims being murdered. More specifically, domestic violence resulted in 2,340 deaths in the United States in 2007, and 70% of those killed were females (CDC 2012). Many people think that victims have the option of leaving and many people blame victims for putting up with the abuse; what many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers, these reasons include, isolation, having children bounding them with the abuser and lack of financial support. "It 's never pretty when you leave an abusive and controlling relationship. The warden always protests when a prison gets shut down," says Dr. Steve Maraboli (qtd from web). Whether a victim stays or leaves their abuser, the outcomes of both situations are not always as easy as many people predict. In some situations, the outcomes of leaving may be very dangerous for both the victim and her children.

According to The National Domestic Violence Hotline, the abused stay in domestic relationships due to fear, embarrassment, low self-esteem, love, and believing that the abuse is normal. For me, these are all true.