Why Women Stay In Abusive Relationships Summary

Domestic violence is the most overlooked, misunderstood offense. Anyone can go through it, but many can’t endure the pain it brings. According to (www.helpguide.org), people whose partners abuse them physically and sexually are at a higher risk of being seriously injured or killed. Most people wonder why doesn’t the victim leave the relationship, well it is not that easy. “The question, ‘Why does she stay?’ is code for some people for, it’s her fault for staying,’ as if domestic violence victims intentionally choose to fall in love with men intent upon destroying us” -Leslie Morgan Steiner (www.azquotes.com).

Leslie Morgan Steiner, TED talk “Why Domestic Violence Victims Don’t leave”, analyze how the violence victims interact with their situation. In her talk, Steiner discusses, why victims don 't leave their abusers, if they know that they are victims of violence and why did not break the silence. Also, Steiner says that the domestic violence can happen to everyone all races, all religion, all income and education levels. However, domestic violence is either a man hitting or abusing of a woman or a woman of a man. In addition, she says that she was able to end her own “Crazy Love” by breaking the silence then, and also in her talk. Steiner, creates a credible argument based on the right amount of emotional appeal. Even Though, her credibility, and statistics were lacking, it helped just to support her position.

In the article “Five Reasons People Abuse their Partners”, written by Carrie Askin, she discusses why men decide to abuse their spouse. Also, Askin is the Co-Director of Menergy, which is a treatment center for abusive partners. Askin goes into great depth and thinks psychological of the many reasons why someone would abuse another person. Askin did not blame it on their behavior but she revealed that a person may be abusive because this person may not know how to react when their ego is bruised, they feel entitled, lack of empathy, lack of accountability, and unaddressed trauma. And then she elaborated on each point. So Askins’s goal by listing those five topics was to show people that there is a deeper reason on why someone may be abusive.

A victim’s mind does not enter into an abusive relationship the same as it, hopefully escapes. Most people are familiar with the honeymoon stage of a new relationship, the excitement, infatuation and methodical self-disclosure that most, if not all people experience and engage in. The gradualism of an abusive relationship is one critical piece of a frightening puzzle.

One aspect is the role that society plays in acclimatizing women to be a victim. Engel (1990 p. 44) explains that women have been taught by society to become martyrs. As children, boys are encouraged to stick up for themselves and girls are urged to accept what is and to be passive, conditioning women to have a victim mindset (Engel, 1990, p. 44). This psychological theory is also supported by Hyde and Else – Quest (2013 p. 298), identifying it the learned helplessness theory. In this theory, when individuals are exposed to disagreeable situations with no hope of avoidance, they learn to accept the circumstance and become helpless (Hyde & Else, 2013, p. 298). When a woman stays in an abusive relationship, she feels powerless, losing hopefulness and accepts the despair (Engel, 1990, p. 143). This can be one of the reasons why women stay in abusive

The entrapment model suggests that staying in an abusive relationship is a way to justify "past effort and time devoted to the relationship" (Strube, 1988). The investment model challenges that the more time, effort, money, emotion, etc. invested into a relationship the longer one devotes to staying in the relationship even when intimate partner violence is frequent. The hypotheses were that women more subjectively invested in baseline data would be especially likely to engage in relationship sacrifices following Intimate Partner Violence. These findings were not supported by the results. The second hypotheses were that women in the long term dating relationship were more likely to engage in relationship sacrifices following Intimate Partner Violence. This proved to be accurate. Researchers suggest that the results may not be generalized to the general population because of the lack of ethnicity and the small severity of abuse occurring.

Many women and men seek intimate relationships in order to fill their emotional needs of security, safety and love. Their journey starts off with their loved ones spoiling them with flattering gifts and emotional words. The love they feel is so wonderful and deep that they believe that nothing can come between them. They are so happy and convinced that they will live happily ever after with the one they love. Unfortunately, the fairytale they have dreamt about was only temporary and soon comes to an end. The love story they have ones longed for turns into a horrible nightmare. The emotional words they were once spoiled with turn into howling screams and name-calling. The flattering gifts turn into physical abuse. This relationship is referred to as domestic violence or intimate partner violence. This happens when a partner or significant other declares power, authority and control over the other partner. To maintain this authority and control, the abusive partner uses emotional, physical or sexual abuse over his victim (Alters 27). Victims will desperately look for an exit out of this relationship, but only to be blocked by numerous walls of the despair, fear and misery. Many people are convinced that victims have the option of leaving, but they are too weak and they choose not to. What many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers. In most cases the outcomes of leaving are

There are many theories as to why a person abuses their partner and as to why that partner stays with the abuser. Dating violence is an important topic to discuss, because there is so much to learn about what to look out for when dating a person. It can also teach the abuser that what they are doing is wrong and to seek help. Dating violence is a very serious issue and has led to physical/ psychological harm, death, children growing up to be offenders, and many other issues. In the readings, It Could Happen to Anyone: Why Battered Women Stay by LaViolette and Barnett and Why Does He Do That?

A relationship is formed when there is a mental connection creating a bond between two people. There are multiple types of relationships that being said, a relationship between two people can have different meanings. Although relationships come in different types, it’s important to understand that all relationships have boundaries that must be acknowledged. In this paper, I will cover healthy vs. unhealthy relationships. I will discuss factors followed by a unhealthy relationships and what triggers the perpetrator to act on domestic violence and the reasons why victims (women) choose to stay. I will also go into detail on how culture has an impact when making decisions regarding a marriage. Finally, I will wrap up with health concerns that women may encounter due to verbal, physical, and emotional violence. Other concerns that need to be considered when in a relationships that goes unhealthy will also be covered. My reason for choosing this topic is the amount of interest I have in learning more about severe conditions relating to relationships. Often times I see and hear about people in relationships that are more of a threat in their life rather than a partner and continue to remain that way.

The article constructs domestic violence as an issue of gender, race and socioeconomic status. Women are identified as the “majority” of victims (Taylor 2014). Consequently, the article conceptually represents domestic violence as events of intimate terrorism where one partner violently terrorizes the other partner to gain complete control over the relationship, which is entirely perpetrated by men (Johnson 2012). With that said, Johnson (2012) points out that majority of domestic violence is situational couple violence, where both the man and the

Throughout the years, there have been immense efforts to expand knowledge about the experiences women have endured in violent relationships. The emergence of internal, external risk factors, correlates, and causes of intimate partner violence has increased rapidly in recent decades. Although there has been a rise in many supportive groups, there are still various barriers that exist and prohibit women from seeking help to detach themselves from a violent relationship. In reading Roz story, I have learned of the many barriers to understand, “why couldn’t she just leave?” Although this question may have no straight answer and may even have hindered implications, I feel that patriarchy plays a role in this intimate partner violence. The

This violence was presumably at the hand if intimate partners” (Bartol & Bartol, 2010, p. 275). It is also noted that an estimated 1/3 of murders committed yearly are intimate partner homicides (Bartol & Bartol, 2010). The research that has been done on Intimate Partner Violence shows that majority of women stay in abusive relationships throughout their life, are murdered by their partners, or leave the relationship completely. Only a small minority of women actually kills their abusers. Victims, not all, have been shown to show low self-esteem, developed learned helplessness, and depression (Bartol & Bartol, 2010).

Central Idea: Abusive relationships start out as the most intensely wonderful relationships, the abuser is perfect in every way. Abuse doesn 't start over night it is a long slow process. First they tear apart your self esteem and isolate you so you have no one to turn to. They pick you apart and make you feel like the lowest slime on the planet. Then they abuse you and when its done they bring you flowers and tell you that it will never happen again and for a while there is that perfect relationship again. Abusive relationships are insanity because they are the worst

Every year in the United States, One in four women are victims of the domestic violence; however, this is only based on what has been reported to the department of justice (Stahly 2008). While men are also victims of domestic violence, women are more often the victims. Moreover, 90% of domestic violence is male initiated. In severe cases domestic violence ends with victims being murdered. More specifically, domestic violence resulted in 2,340 deaths in the United States in 2007, and 70% of those killed were females (CDC 2012). Many people think that victims have the option of leaving and many people blame victims for putting up with the abuse; what many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers, these reasons include, isolation, having children bounding them with the abuser and lack of financial support. "It 's never pretty when you leave an abusive and controlling relationship. The warden always protests when a prison gets shut down," says Dr. Steve Maraboli (qtd from web). Whether a victim stays or leaves their abuser, the outcomes of both situations are not always as easy as many people predict. In some situations, the outcomes of leaving may be very dangerous for both the victim and her children.

Some women take the position that “hope springs eternal” for people in love and they shouldn’t be held accountable for the abusive spousal choices they make. That is precisely the kind of romantic notion that men and women cling to and use to seduce them into staying in relationships in which there is abundant evidence that they should leave. Often friends and parents try to intervene but when “hope springs eternal” obvious dangers are overlooked, denied and women tell themselves something like, “If I just love him enough, he’ll change.” Battered men usually say exactly the same things. “What is needed in situations of verbal and physical abuse and danger is not romantic fantasy but a critical and self-protective assessment of the facts followed by a decision based on those facts”(Walker 17).