Working Mother Vs. Stay-At-Home Mother

People believe that marriage is easy and is the key to love and happiness, but in reality marriage is harder than it looks. Everyone marries for different reasons, for good or for bad. People today don’t understand the meaning of marriage; it is more than just money and appearance. Seeing today’s world of marriage is being influenced by media shows like Jerry Springer, Judge Judy, and Murray makes you realize how society today identifies marriage different. Couples who live unmarried will be happier and have more choices than those that are married in agreement with Catherine Newman’s essay called I Do. Not.: Why I Won’t Marry in the book “Acting Out Culture: Reading and Writing “, by: James S. Miller. Catherine Newman is a writer and an author

If one were to read any article by the average woman in the media – and some males for that matter – regarding the declining state of marriage rates today. One could reasonably think that the reason marriages are on the decline is that women are choosing not to get married or some other such tripe that ineffectively attempts to hide the truth of the matter. (Ayanna, G. 2010), (Dewitt.1992), (Rosenbloom, 2006), (Campbell, 2001)

The methods or style of parenting, teaching and engagements strong impacts on the child development as it is the primary socialization point for children. It gives children a point of reference as when they are young they grow observing and learning keenly on what their parents are doing. Studies show that, children that are raised by active, involving and playful fathers performs better in school, have higher IQ and can cope with school related stress easily compared to those that are raised in families where father figure is absent or less involving. It also shows

Before we began to build our family, my husband and I were both working full time jobs at an upwards of 60 hours a week. This was practical at the time, but I knew I could not continue to do so with an infant. This led me to leave my job of 3 years just before giving birth. After a few months, I debated long and hard on returning to work. After very careful consideration, I decided the best thing to do for everyone would be for me to stay home. I knew that being a stay at home mom would be hard. More importantly, I also knew that my daughter needed me to be there for her. It helped me learn that the plan you may have for yourself may not be the best plan for everyone else; being able to compromise for loved ones is always important.

Over the years, the role of mother in the life of their children has been crucial and prominent. The child’s first education starts at home with their mother. The mother teaches the child how to walk, how to talk, and how to become a strong man or woman in the society. Some mothers will even stop going to work in order to take care of their kids so that they can be a better person and a good citizen.

There are soccer moms, stay-at-home moms, working moms, “cool” moms, and many other types that are at war with each other on how to raise children. Along with the many types of moms, there are hundreds of different types of kids. There is no reason for one parent to tell another on how to raise their child, because each kid is unique. On the finish line, I don’t think it matters how many soccer games the mom went to or if the child was sent to daycare. The quality time that mothers and children from 0-18 has an impact on the child’s life. However, the amount of time that they spend together does not have much of an influence for the future.

Over the past decades, how Americans perceive the marital relationship greatly reformed, illuminating society’s values. In the past, marriage use to represent a legal contract to bear children and acquire finances, but today, “In all too many communities in the US, especially poor and minority ones, marriage is a retreat” (Wilcox et al., 2005, p. 5). Rather than observing marriage as an obligation, Americans now perceive a marriage to entail intimate commitments between affectionate partners. America transformed its values from the society and family to the individual level. Of the major values changes, which occurred over the past decades, this article exemplifies an increase in single-parent homes, cohabiting, and divorce. Due to America’s expansion of individualism and materialism, individuals no longer perceive their marriage as life long commitments. This transformation occurred because of a shift in societal values; society no longer places stigma on divorce and single parents, which aided in the increasing numbers of marital shifts. In fact, Americans tend to enter marriages with unrealistic expectations, expecting their partner to fulfill all of their needs without conflict. It stands as our unrealistic expectations and perceptions that caused a shift in marriages.

Likewise, children who are neglected and live with workaholics begin to form negative mentalities. On the other hand, children who live with affectionate parents develop a care for others and become mature sooner.

Once, one of people’s greatest life achievements was getting married, more so for women. It is considered the ultimate form of love between two people, however, the motives for getting married are widely varied. As we evolve as a society, so do our outlooks on love and marriage. In 2014, one half of adults do not live with a spouse, as opposed to one third of adults in 1967. Therefore, fewer than 70 percent of children younger than the age of 18 currently live in two-parent households, as opposed to 90 percent in 1960. Many children in single-parent households are reported to be living with their mothers, which only amplifies the poverty rise in single mother’s demographic. Another factor is the role race plays in this statistic, with 18 percent of white children living only with their mothers, opposed to 51 percent of black children living only with their mother. (Socioeconomic Patterns of Marriage and Divorce, 2016). These changes in definitions of family life will undoubtedly play a role in altering the future of American economics, as well as redefined the concepts of marriage to reflect modern-day standards of

Much emphasis has been placed in the field of child development and the role that early providers possess when it comes to the needs of children at the early stages of life. Whether conceptualizing socialization and priming with Locke’s “tabula rosa/blank slate” or Rousseau’s “preassembled moral schema” approach to child development, this “window of opportunity” is both fleeting and permanent. Every interaction molds the individual into the person they are to become, and the bond that the dependent child forms with the caregiver is a precedent to the numerous relationships and attachments they will create as an adult. Granted that the provider/nurturer fulfills the needs of attachment and attentiveness for the offspring, this will determine the success of progressing through child developmental stages, and leads to a higher propensity of social adaptiveness. Inversely, if the aforementioned things are absent in a child’s early years, detrimental effects could occur, including stints in physical, social, and mental development. This is dependent upon the severity and duration of neglect, and has been seen in clinical cases that appears as psychological phenomena to both the general public, and researchers alike.

Years ago, children used to spend most of their time with their parents. They worked with their families on the farm, in a shop, or learning their father’s trade. Girls worked alongside their mothers, helping with household chores, doing laundry, helping with younger siblings and cooking and baking. Most children were also schooled in their own homes and so children saw their parents all day long. It was easy for a parent to be a part of their children’s life and have influence over them. Now, children enter day care or early pre-school and are in school all day long. At first children are more influenced by parents when they are young, but become more influenced by their friends as they get older unless parents make a major effort to be a

Besides from the child having opportunity for fun through interaction with another person, a rougher and more challenging (though still comforting) environment that is beneficial for development. This type of play which is more predominant when provided from a father can present the child the opportunity to learn his own physical boundaries, the effect of its own actions on its surrounding world, and to learn about its own emotions while discovering the notions of winning and losing. Studies have proven that interactions with the father through play and otherwise teach children to become more emotionally aware of themselves and others. Studies have shown that these children will also get along better with siblings and peers better due to these emotional developments (6). These benefits for the child can also have lasting effects into later life for developing relationships with others. The father figure is also usually more responsible for influencing challenges and trying new things for young children. This is significant for the development of the child’s problem solving skills as well as his or her self-esteem when able to succeed in new or challenging situations. These can also help build independence as a father figure tends to allow the child to explore the world and try things out for him or herself. The father figure is also more responsible for disciplinary action towards the child which not only teaches the child what kind of behavior is

Being a working mom or a stay-at-home mom both has their benefits and drawbacks. Most of us don’t get the luxury to choose. Instead we must choose one or the other. I have had to make these choose several times throughout the eleven years since I became a mom. I will share with you some examples of the benefits and drawbacks that go with both being a working mom or a stay-at-home mom.

Although there are groups of people who believe that mothers should stay at home with their children, other critics argue that being a stay at home mother has little or no effect on children and their happiness. A family filled with children can get the attention they need, even if it is not from the mother of the family. This attention can come from other caregivers such as daycare either inside or outside the home or from a relative, such as a grandparent. Getting attention from other adults can be beneficial because children can build relationships with others. This attention from other adults can provide children with security, even though it comes from people other than a mother. Having a caregiver other than a mother can also lead to a more efficient life, bringing a scheduled routine to to the life of a child and allowing the mother to be able to earn money to

The participants included two working mothers and two stay-at-home mothers within the ages of 20-35. All the participants I found were close friends or acquaintances but the hardest part was to find stay at home mothers. The method used for my research was interview questions. I asked five questions for each mother, two separate sets of questions for stay-at-home mothers and working mothers. The first participant was a thirty-two year old, full-time working mother who is also currently enrolled at Sacramento State has three children. The second participant was a twenty-two year old, who is a full-time mother working at a dental office in Stockton, CA. She is a long-time friend who has a three-year old boy. The third participant a twenty-six year old, is a stay-at-home mother with two boys, ages three and four. My last participant was my sister’s best friend, a stay-at-home mother, but also a part-time student with two boys, a ten year old and a five year old. Three of the mothers that I interviewed were single with only one that has a husband.