You Do Not Know Who I Am

I have a passionate desire to excel in my academic life. My early elementary school years were arduous because I have always been a very stubborn person; and at the time, I had simply decided I did not want to go to school. However, about halfway through my 1st grade year, I decided that I could no longer go without giving my best academically and I turned my stubborn rebellion against school into a

My grades have always been a high priority for me, along with my friends, family, and personal health, all of which are important for my future as a productive citizen. Throughout my schooling I have never felt the animosity towards education which sadly many of my peers hold, in fack I have even come to enjoy the challenges that school can present. I think mainly because much of the skills needed to do well in school came fairly naturally to me. Due to my adeptness in school I have felt that I should help those around me which are struggling in school and since I began helping others in school, I have found that I can explain those subjects which came easily to me in a way that could be easily understood by those I

My educational past has had its good and bad days. In early grades school was easy and school was enjoyable. Somewhere along the line I lost my talent and things went south quickly. For some reason I kept telling myself studying wasn’t necessary because of how well I did in the past. In the sixth grade we had our first math test. I figured why study, I’m smart, all the answers will come right to me. I start the test and immediately start struggling. I couldn’t remember anything and of course when I got it back, it was an F. After receiving that F, I realized things have changed and I must put forth much more effort. Math for me was never the same after that moment. I started struggling with memorizing the equations and my grade suffered. One thing I needed to realize was I didn’t have all the knowledge. In the past, my education has been a little rocky.

After all, math was one of my best subjects. I had never really had an experience where I just couldn't understand the concept of a math problem, of how it was solved and why. Our teachers has warned us back in elementary school, that one day we would hit an invisible wall and not ease through classes. That one day we would struggle with understanding a problem, a concept or even a subject. I had never believed them, thinking this would never happen to me, that I could somehow avoid this wall of confusion and just walk right through. But there I was, utterly confused and frustrated at a simple problem that everyone else could solve. Why was I not seeing it? Why couldn't I understand the solution? I asked myself. For the first time in my life I really struggled to get an A in a class. I had my sister tutor me almost every day, preparing for a quiz and then the next, and the next. I came in to my teacher for lunch and he helped me step by step. I studied for tests, and worked hard. And my work payed off. I got a high A in the course, and a lot of experience from it. It taught me how to work hard for something, to earn a good grade when you deserve it, and it gave me the skills I needed to get As in the high school classes I am taking this

My moms raised me with a strong set of morals, including “hard work pays off.” Sometimes this can be discouraging when you work hard, but it doesn’t pay off as you’d like it to. I’ve always gotten the grades I strive for without much struggle. However, once high school started, everything changed. I’d work for weeks on a scholarship essay, and I wouldn’t even place. I’d work for months to get something published and then read other people’s names in the congratulations announcement. I’d constantly wonder: Who’s at the top of the class? Who’s going to win the end of year awards? When you consistently get the grades that I do, people just expect those grades. No one congratulates you on your hard work anymore, and you don’t always get recognized. Despite the lack of recognition, I still take pride in my grades, and continue to work hard. Getting great grades is something I know I can do, even when it’s difficult to do. The difficulty makes it even more satisfying when I see the hard work pay off, and I get the grade I wanted. I’ve encountered

In high school, I struggled with both math and physics. Between the two, physics was more challenging for me than math. When my father realized I was failing both subjects (with flying colors) he immediately hired a tutor for me. Prior to getting help, I spent a lot of time in circles trying to figure out one question after another. For some reason I could not get the hang of physics. I started to feel embarrassed about not know how to solve my math and physics problems when I realized that one of my closest girlfriend was doing well in both subjects. After taking a quiz, I would hide my grade from my classmates because I was so embarrassed about it. When my father received my first quarter report card he was very disappointed

About four years ago, I was just starting my first year of high school. During my previous tenure in middle school, I was basically an average student with multiple C’s and barely passing classes. So when I entered high school, I was not that enthusiastic about it and I continued the trend of not really caring about my grades in the 9th grade. As I became more aware of the opportunities I could get by receiving good grades, I began to actually care more about school and tried to get good grades. I began to do something that I never did before,

Previous to the events that occurred in the Advanced Placement class junior year, my mindset in school was fixed to the millionth degree. The reasoning for this was my placement into the gifted program in elementary school that inflated my ignorance and arrogance. The gifted instructors would praise the gifted student to no end, making us strive for nothing greater, as we thought that we had already achieved as high as possible. This positive praise clouded my thinking into

Before the 6th grade, I really enjoyed math and I believed I was even good at it. Then to add to my excitement about math, I made a perfect score on my 6th grade Taks test. However, the next year (my 7th grade year) my teacher was a new teacher and you could tell she was struggling. She was a very nice teacher, and I loved her so much, I just struggled to understand what she was teaching. The next year, I transferred to a new school. Here, the teachers were not certified but they tried to help with everything they possibly could; however, their ability to help us was pretty limited. At my new school, we did all of our work on computers for half of the day and attended college classes at Panola and TSTC the rest of day. While I truly loved this

Ever since I entered public school as a homeschooler in eighth grade, I have struggled with defining my worth in letters and numbers. In every class I would completely immerse myself into each subject, trying my hardest to obtain that precious “A+” and perfect GPA. Instead of remembering my true worth, I would anxiously search for my worth in my grades, either a red letter of honor...or of shame. The grade at the top of my assignment was my scarlet letter, my idol and my obsession. In short, my grades consumed my life. I was miserable. Last year, however, I finally began to understand that my beliefs surrounding my identity were not true. The red letter scratched on the top of my quiz, test, or paper is not my source of identity and does not

I wasn't used to not being able to float throughout school and still getting A’s as, not to toot my own horn, I am a fairly intelligent student and was able to put in minimal effort and still get the A’s that made my mom proud. When I go to high school things changed, I put in the same amount of effort and assumed that I would do just as good as I always had, however things didn't work out like that. I quickly saw a drop in my grades that I couldn't seem to fix. For two years I was told that I should just drop out of my honors classes and accept that I was just not smart enough, this occurred for my first two years of high school and I was terribly frustrated and my excuse became: hey, I can't control it, I have ADHD. This is what I told teachers, parents but most damaging,

In 2011, I graduated from middle school as a top ten percentage students, and started four years of high school at Westbury Junior High. At Westbury Junior High, I did not get the amount of supports as in middle school, so I had to take care of everything by myself without any advising from a counselor. I got bullied several times in high school because of my race, but I kept them in secret and focused on academic life only. I distracted myself from those negativities comments from others ;organized my times to study at home and school, and completed homework before due date. Within a month, I got in honor rolls and received high scores in class.

During the course of my middle school and high school education I have always found that teachers, peers, advisors, and even my parents have put labels on me. A.D.H.D., hyper, loud, distracted, daydreamer, and perhaps the worst and most sad… Failure. I used to believe these words and labels used on me and my grades though out high school reflected it. It wasn't until a teacher by the name of Susan Spees showed a little interest and hope in my that I excelled exceptionally in my grades. She believed in me and that was the little push I needed to try harder and actually focus on my work. Susan was a special educations teacher that had worked with many “troubled” kids. Kids that most teachers would call disobedient, loud, hyper, violent, dysfunctional. I

I have committed myself to pursuing my undergraduate degree because I am completely aware of the importance of education. I am also a proud first generation college student determined to succeed, undeterred by my circumstances as an adolescent. I didn’t have a typical childhood. My mother was an alcoholic who also struggled severely with drug addiction. Unfortunately, her dependence led her into a cycle of domestic violence, jail, and many failed treatment attempts. Her choices preceded her absence for the majority of my life. From my knowledge, she didn’t even attain a high school diploma. My father was always present in my life. He raised my brother and me without the help of a significant other. He always emphasized education so he put me through private schooling.

In junior High School, things started to turn around for me. Although I was still placed in lower level classes, I developed a love for learning. In the years to come from Junior High to High School, I had a strong urge to make up for lost time. One class I started to excel in was the one I used to have the most trouble with, Mathematics. It seemed as though the once boring and complex equations now seemed meaningful and simple. As I progressed into 8th grade, I was able to advance to normal classes. I felt that the hard work I put in was finally paying of. At this point, I felt that I could handle a higher level. At the end of 8th grade, I took the necessary procedures and tests to try and get into honor - level courses in 9th grade. After taking a summer course of Algebra 1 and several tests I was able to succeed and take the classes. The experience was great. I felt that I was finally going the right direction