Being An Adult Child Of An Alcoholic

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, seventy six million Americans have been exposed to alcoholism in the family. That means one out of four families is affected by an alcoholic, making alcoholism responsible for more family problems than any other single cause (Parsons). Alcoholism is a disease that not only affects the individual, but also everyone around the alcoholic. Alcoholics can make irrational decisions that are harmful not only to themselves but also to the people around them. These irrational decisions can cause financial instability for the household which, in turn, contributes to neglect.

Many people across the world suffer from alcoholism, a family disease. It is called a family disease because the addiction harms the alcoholic, and everyone who has to live with them. Children consistently suffer when they share a house with an alcoholic. Unfortunately, alcoholism is common and many children find themselves in this situation. The emotional and psychological scars that children can develop in alcoholic homes can be so deep that they can last well into adulthood. Youth who grew up in an alcoholic home can develop similar personality traits and characteristics. Approximately 26.8 million children are exposed to alcoholism in the family and 6.6 million children 18 and younger live in households with at least one alcoholic

The psychological effects of one’s childhood experiences can have a huge toll on the person we blossom into in life and that was the divorce of my two parents at the age of six. Growing up with an alcoholic father has had an outstanding impact on my self-worth. I could never see myself opening up to others; I could never be my true self in front of anyone except for a few people that have supported me through it all. I’ve always wondered over the period of my life that there was a reason for my father’s actions and why my father wasn’t there through the most important events throughout my sister and I’s lives.

A staggering 30% of U.S. adults have been or currently are alcoholics, and not all of them have abstained from parenthood. The essay “Under the Influence” by Russel Sanders tells the tale of a young boy who had an alcoholic father, who he could not understand why he was an alcoholic, except for the belief that he was possessed by demons. He didn’t live around any treatment centers that could help his father, for he lived in the backwoods of Ohio. He talked about the constant fear of his father beating him (which he never did), and the constant fear of his father leaving him (which he did for small increments of time). The trauma of having a father who was an alcoholic father stayed with Sanders well into adulthood.

The adult children of alcoholics take themselves very seriously in their life. Also, the ACOA has difficulty with intimate relationships. The ACOA, overact to change over which they have no control and constantly seek approval and affirmation. As well as, feeling different from other people and are super responsible or super irresponsible. The adult children of alcoholics are extremely loyal, even in the face of evidence that the loyalty is undeserved. Lastly, the adult children of alcoholics are impulsive. This can lead to going full steam ahead without realizing the consequences that it may incur (Weintraub,

Many children of alcoholics (COAs) have similar personality types caused by mental illnesses, mostly various forms of anxiety disorder or the Imposter syndrome. A child of an alcoholic is at a greater risk for mental illnesses than the average non-COA. A large portion of COAs suffer from anxiety disorders, behavioral problems, and low self-esteem (National Association for Children of Alcoholics). There is a tendency for female COAs to suffer from the Imposter Syndrome, but in rare cases, males can also develop it. The

My mother’s childhood environment was hugely dissimilar to my own. While my grandparents were largely removed in her life as a child, my mother and father were extremely supportive and present throughout my childhood. My aunt and mother described their home environment as chaotic and full of marital tension. In light of this, my mother’s response was to leave her home as often as she could. Being deemed the quiet child that rarely stood up for herself, my mother expressed how she felt during daily occasions like dinnertime:

Every generation that is born is the future of the world. We evolve as a society as one, we build each other up for the future. The source of this extravagant outcome is people, but we cannot succeed as a whole if there are individuals who are suffering and are in need of help. Some who need help and guidance are children of alcoholics (COA’s), they bear the time they live with their parents and they do not receive help in the process. These children go through so many different issues with family, school, their social, physical and mental wellbeing. Children of alcoholics growing into adulthood have negative outcomes that can be diminished by school administration taking a stand to exhibit attention and support to the situation. The schools can contribute tremendously by having guest speakers to talk about the subject, and by introducing a counseling profession that can have a thorough background, plus a program or organization that is able to connect with these children to help and support them.

My mother never pulls the rehab card - that's one subject they tend to stay away from when arguing. My father was an alcoholic, and sadly still is, but he has been to rehab about three times now. I say about because he got kicked out for being caught drinking scotch out on the yard during his third time.

My mother had it rough growing up. Forced to be out of the house nearly by dawn and only to return by nightfall, she was ignored and turned away by her mother. All throughout her childhood, and most of her young adult life until she ran away, my mother was

26,000 women die each year from alcohol related causes. More than 10% of children live with an alcoholic. I happen to be one. My mom was married to a man I will not name, but he was an alcoholic, he would steal money from us and our family and his and he is still stealing from his. We luckily got out of his life before it got worse. We may of gotten out but we didn't get away from it. My mom this year started to drink every night, then she started to spend all her time out at the bars. I didn't want to believe she was turing into what she took us away from but it was to late. Last night I made the decision to leave. I deiced that I could not be the one buying the groceries for the house anymore or cleaning up after anyone or being home alone

Alcoholism took too many lives in my family. No one wakes up one day and decides to be an alcoholic—it takes time like any other thing I guess. It starts with having a beer with buddies and progressively falls into copping with heartache by pouring another glass alone in an empty room. That’s what happened to my Uncle Rhett. At 17, life was nothing but an adventure for him. He was graduating next month and would be off to college by the end of the summer. He would party with friends and crack open another cold one every Friday and Saturday night down on the Island. Life was everything but tragic.

I was raised in a household with my parents and my siblings; a younger brother and a younger sister. My father suffered with alcohol dependency and health issues so was usually out of work. My mother, although not at my father’s level, often used to copy his actions and engage in alcohol abuse too. With very little household income, money was tight and so there was frequently insufficient food in the house. In addition, other problems associated with alcohol misuse often presented, including domestic violence and arguing. At that time domestic violence was a private matter and so no help was every provided, even though children witnessed unpleasant events. Instead, as the eldest I took it on myself to ensure that both younger children were cared for and shielded. This meant that I was very mature as I had to grow up fast. At that time I believed that my dad was responsible for the situation as that was what my mother used to say to me. The wider family also believed similarly and viewed our family as ‘trouble’ so used to distance themselves from us. Even the school I attended used to treat me differently

People drink in many ways, for many different reasons. We drink socially, to gain acceptance into a group. We drink alone to ease stress, to cope with our problems, or we “drink because we like the taste or how it makes us feel”#. Often drinking is a learned behavior, starting out as a social drinker; you quickly become psychologically and physically dependent. When someone reaches this stage they are often classified as an alcoholic. To an alcoholic, drinking becomes a compulsion; they cannot stop themselves from having another drink, like a social drinker can. In many cases alcoholics don’t even have to drink continuously in order to be an alcoholic. One the problems of alcohol addiction is that it’s something that doesn’t just effect the individual but it effects, friends and family as well. Spouse abuse, child abuse and dysfunctional family relationships can all be influenced by alcohol abuse.

Throughout history these ways can be called "useful," however, known thousands of years ago that abusive and excessive drinking led to negative outcomes and adverse alcohol side effects.