My Experience In High School

I remembered the first day I started high school, I was so nervous. As a kid I always remember I would have an anxiety problem for almost every little thing. I wake every morning feeling nauseated even though there was nothing to worry about because I mean after all it was just school. Honestly I guess I felt like that because I care so much about what other people would think or say about me. I remembered thinking damn, I just got out of middle school here goes another 4 long year of school. It was just extremely frustrating but what I didn’t know was that those years would go by so fast. After all, like everyone says, a lot happens in 4years. On my first day everything was going fine. I had made new friends, so far I liked all my teachers, and I got into this Culinary Arts class that I didn’t even know I was going to liked, I learned so much in Culinary. Everyday I would go in excited to see what I would learn the next day. I even started helping my mom cook, I learned so much in a gnomish time that’s when I discovered I had a passion for learning how to cook. I can honestly say I’m so glad I got into that class because now I know how to cook a little bit of Italian thanks to my godfather who is an excellent chef in New York City. I learn a lot from my mother who I’m forever thankful I just don’t tell her as much. Thanks to her I learn how to cook almost all kinds of Mexican food, I learn how to be a little more responsible, I getting into finishing my Diploma.

During the first two years of my high school career, I experienced intolerable levels of hardship which I eventually vanquished and was able to preside over. In case It doesn’t become evident, I have a “type a” personality which I’ve been more than conscious of since my middle school days. The feeling of unease that tormented me all throughout middle and half of my high school years when I wasn’t excelling further more than I was in my previous years. Personal goals, and ambitions, that I wasn’t quite living up to, it raged me, It wasn’t who I was, I was better than that. I always thought I’d be destined for greater things, I never imagined it’d come with sacrifices and failures, at least not like mine. It wasn’t until I began high school when I realized how different things were and it wouldn’t be your ordinary middle school level material.

As I opened my eyes and allowed my posture to relax, I let out a long, deep breath. The Buddhist monk conducting the religious ritual made his closing remarks, and I was sent out of the temple, back into the sweltering heat of summer in Virginia. Because a scout is reverent, it was expected of me by my troop that I attend one religious ceremony during my time at the National Scout Jamboree. Leading up to the service, my 13 year old self was especially concerned that the experience would be long, boring, and uneventful. “Why should I have to sit in silence when I could be rock climbing or mountain biking?” I thought. After the ceremony, however, I was at peace. I found that I thoroughly enjoyed the experience. By the time my troop and I left the Jamboree, the culmination of my adventures started to awaken something within me.

I can vividly remember the feeling of excitement that overwhelmed me when I first walked onto the Peddie campus. When I got out of the car and had people greeting me, I knew that Peddie would be the place for me. My tour guide, Oliver Crane, completely convinced me that Peddie was the optimal place for me to do a PG year. After visiting the school, I immediately started on my application and eventually realized that I was accepted. About a week before heading up to Peddie, I started researching the school. I found mostly positive things, but also some negatives. However, this is expected of any school. I read that it can be difficult to make friends and that it is also hard being independent without having parents always by your side. By prejudging the school before I actually got there, I created so much built up anxiety and hesitation. By doing this I felt like I was already going into the new school year completely closed off to the environment. I eventually realized in order for me to have a successful and meaningful experience here I would have to be open to a new environment. I was extremely worried about whether I would make friends or not, whether people would like me, and whether the academics would be too challenging for me. After being at Peddie for two weeks now, I can say that these things do not present an issue for me because my maturity, determination to engage in the Peddie community, and motivation to excel academically has led to my success thus far.

4th grade was a filled with chaos. Even if I try to remember one moment, I can only pull out blurry images. But out of all of these foggy memories, one stands above all. Three years back, I’m standing in front of the whole class; face as red like blood as everyone gawks and laughs. How I got into this situation is a long story. Very little did I know, it would alter my singing ‘career’.

Almost three years of high school had gone by with nothing but straight As. However, my Junior year ended with a B printed firmly on my report card, yet I was proud nonetheless. I had worked my hardest in that class, harder than I had for any other. I stood by my mark, and if my best was a B, I was satisfied with that result. My pride would have been inconceivable to the Alexander of the years prior, though. I’ve been an obsessive perfectionist as far back as I can remember. I remember checking my elementary school math homework again and again, just to make sure that there were no errors at all. It was easy to be perfect when the work I got was easy and limited, but when middle school came and went and high school began, it was a different story. By the beginning of tenth grade, it was not uncommon for me to stay up several nights in a row, toiling in the office downstairs over a product that was already good but not quite flawless. As the minute hand whirled around the clock and the coffee supply dwindled, I became more tired and depressed over a goal I always fell short of. My teachers said that I did great work through, and that’s what mattered. Perfect work meant perfect grades; perfect grades meant a perfect college; a perfect college meant a perfect job, and a perfect job meant a perfect life. Schoolwork was all I thought about. Even the necessary act of eating was always accompanied with a pencil and paper. When winter break arrived and I had no papers to write, no

“So, why did you choose to come here?” a dorm proctor asked the very first time we met, right in front of my room in Bancroft Hall, which would be my new home for the next nine months. Confused and a little jet lagged, I did not respond; I nodded, smiled, and stepped back into my room. As the door closed, locking me into my little world of isolation, I thought about the question. I did not know the answer, for I did not “choose” to come to this school. In fact, I expected to attend a school in the UK. However, as a Thai Scholar, I did not have much choice but to go wherever the Thai embassy told me to go. As fate had it, I was placed in one of the most prestigious high schools: Phillips Exeter Academy.

In the summer of 2013, I received an email that changed my life forever. It was up to me to accept or decline the new journey that allowed me to be accepted into Edgecombe Early College High School. I decided to accept this new journey that was filled with 5 years of butterflies, hardships, new opportunities and self improvement.

I am embarrassed and ashamed of the snapshot you have viewed of my performance in high school. Aside from my parents, no one apart of my life over the past decade is aware I am capable of such a poor performance. I feel ashamed because my actions represent more than just myself, I represent the Army as a senior leader, one who is charged with mentoring, training, and educating some of Americas brightest young men and women. My high school years do not define me; please take in consideration the tremendous work I have strived to accomplish over the past 15 years.

Throughout my high school career, all I really knew was wrestling. The hard practices, making weight, and the camaraderie of all my teammates is all I cared about. I lived and breathed the sport, all thanks to a friend of mine that encouraged me to go to one practice Freshman year. Looking back now that I have graduated, like many other people I wish I could go back and do it again. I want one more match. But life goes on and I must keep going. Going through high school wrestling has shaped who I am today, the confidence I developed, the self-discipline, and the leadership qualities I learned. I am so glad I took on the sport.

Starting off as a freshmen I was very quiet, I was scared of the teachers and classmates. Everyday was a struggle to get into the classrooms my body would shake, my hands would sweat, and my voice would tremble. Each and everyday felt like the first day of school. I hated the way I acted and looked at school as if it were a challenge. Being social became like solving a binary code. I could not figure out how to talk to people everyone made it seem so easy to connect to one another. I felt like a foreigner who did not know how to speak English. For the rest of the year I let myself be in isolation only speaking to my friends I have meet in middle school. As the new year came around I felt compelled to break the habit of being preserved. I went in with the intention of making at least four new friends. I knew it was something I needed to come out of if, I wanted to succeed in the near future and interacting was definitely needed for internships or job applications. Being very serious about wanting to grow as an individual I tried out for our school cheer. As I waited in line for a number to try out I was ready to just drop it and leave. My friend told me it was gonna be fine and I remained in line. As tryouts went on I felt so confident I was surprised myself. While learning the motions and dance I felt relieved. For the first time I was alive interacting with everyone who was trying out it was truly the time of my life. Two days later time to tryout came. I was me again.

Whaaaannnnn! I hear as I wake up wiping my eyes. My one year old son Ashton is screaming his eyes out. I then waddled into the bedroom where he was laying and quickly put him back to sleep. I finally started to fall back asleep myself before I heard knocking on the bedroom door. It was my mother saying “Wake up it’s time for school”. I then laid in the bed and closed my eyes as I tried to get a few more minutes of rest when my mother then yelled from the other room “Get up, you are going to make me late for work”. I then knew from there it was going to be a long school year.

“Hey, move out of my seat!” she snarled at me. “Of course princess.” I fakely replied back. But I still moved. There’s nothing else I could’ve done. I would’ve had to face another day of insults and curses hurled at me by her and her entourage’s petty mouths. It’s not like she usually sat there, it’s just because I just happened to sit in a place where all of her little minions would fit as well.

I walked into Urban wearing Abercrombie and Fitch Jeans, a maroon v-neck t-shirt with a cardigan, and tan Sperrys. I had planned the outfit out the night before, wanting to impress my peers and show off my mature and put together high school self. I came into the big cold Urban gym in with my head held high, believing, no, knowing that I had made the perfect outfit to represent myself on the first day of school. However, my confidence quickly deflated and red rushed to my cheeks as I realized my mistake.

I didn’t know what I was getting myself into when my family would ask me “So are you ready for high school?”. They would ask It with such enthusiasm my immediate response always happened to be a yes. I just thought of course I’m ready it’s just another step closer to growing up It couldn’t be that big of a change. When I look back at that now I can’t help but to see how naive I was for thinking It would be such a piece of cake, that I would come out being the same person I was before I started. I know now that without my high school experience I wouldn’t be the person I am today, and so for that very reason I am thankful.