Pillow Monologue

But as I make meaning of the story that my life encapsulates – I was a damaged soul, damaged by abuse by my own father. I can't even say I have a father, because I grew up without knowing what father's love felt like. My earthly father had a gambling problem and had multiple affairs outside of marriage. The pains of my childhood robbed me of my identity, confidence, security, trust in men, joy of living and believe in myself. I struggled greatly even as I grew into adulthood, but, God has healed me, and He is still healing and redeeming me from the wounds of my past. Through many challenges in life, as I grew into adulthood, I find myself asking Him, “God, why, oh God, why do you give me such an emotionally challenging childhood?” Though I did not receive a clear answer all these years but he taught me one thing, and that is to live my life with open hands, to allow God, the Author to do what He so choose to do. It is He, God, the Master of my life, and as for me, to live a life surrendered to my Master. Only then, did I realise that that's how I am able to taste his endless richness of His grace. God has redeemed me and has blessed me so much. Today, I can say that I am blessed and I give thanks to God. Now that I am here, in SBC, studying this work of Benner, it is totally sobering to be called into the work of soul care. Having taken the journey that I have, this reckoning gives me true meaning of what I have experienced in my past; it is that

I was standing there crying and praising God, saying, “Yes” to everything He told me. After I had sat down, I began to wonder where I would go, and before the thought could leave my mind the Lord said,

and foremost, the Almighty Father be thanked for this sight. I suffered a long harrowing

Morning arrived yet this time with a cheerful face of my mother and my healing brother’s smile. For the first time, this felt like home exactly, the way we lived 2 years back with warmth and happiness echoing in our house. I almost forgot the comfort of sitting on a couch or laying on a bed beside my mother. The aroma of her devouring food filled the house and the riddles of my ever loved brother never stopped, now, I had no need to keep track of

I desired liberation from captivity; I was a prisoner of my mind. I was unable to find help in my physical world. I held this cross at night in my hand and prayed from memory, which I normally forgot, and use my own version. “ Lord forgive me for my sins and help me sleep please” this was my common begged prayer. I sometimes read the whole Lords Prayer in the cross during the day. I had it on a chain around my neck. Bering in mind I had no religious involvement prior.

Pulling her body up from a kneeling position, her knees creak; her legs so weak she is barely able to stand. “God, morning prayers provide peace, but I don’t know how much longer I can kneel. Help me through this day, so those in need are blessed and I enjoy the friends you brought into my life.”

I was in a place I was not familiar with, however, I would soon fall in love with. When I stepped off the giant steel contraption, I was greeted with a hot summer’s air. We then got into an old rusty van with the stench of cigarettes. Two hours later we finally reached our destination. Our destination was no resort on an island. Our destination was a small village out in seclusion. We walked around the village meeting the natives. As we was walking, I looked over my shoulder and saw a young lady. I glanced at her feet and noticed the red dirt overtaking the color of her skin. My preacher and I went over to her mud hut and told her about Jesus Christ. As my preacher was speaking, a little girl peaked her head out from her momma’s tattered skirt. I motioned her to approach me and handed her some candy. Her little smooth hands snatched the candy from mine. I welcomed her with a big grin and she returned with the same. Just to see one little girl smile made my entire

Don’t say a word! You screwed both of our final grades over for your stupid burger obsession! On top of that you’re just acting like a douche (probably need new phrasing)! It’s like nothing else even exist to you anymore! I don’t care how good you think it was, it’s gone, and there’s nothing anyone here can do to change that! It’s gone and that's it, and now I’m leaving too!

Suspended as you are in the capsule, a half-corpse, a modern lich desperately grasping at life through death, I know you cannot read this, and that you will never read it before the capsule becomes your coffin.

I received the news, that my mother had no chance to live and one doctor, placed his hand on my shoulder and sighed loudly with discomfort. He said,” she is not a candidate for any treatment.” I stormed into the ICU room, and held my mother’s hand; she glared at me, unconsciously. I couldn't help but hold back my emotions, so I could be strong for our family. As my eyes were helplessly filling up with tears, I couldn't help but to look around at the doctors and nurses working diligently, and doing the best they could for my mother. At the moment, I remembered the sacrifices that were made to help my mother and how saving lives was my calling from God. Thankfully, my mother survives but only at a twenty percent ejection

It ripped through my chest like a beast trying to escape its cage. I finally felt it, God was in my heart. He had released all the displeasure, grief, and hopelessness I had felt for so many years and I knew from that moment, for the rest of my living and breathing life, I needed to show others who He was and what He could do. The feeling was indescribable and incomparable to anyone else, but I could see him moving through the other students’ lives around me that night. From the first gentle touch of his love, I vowed I would follow, respect, and live a life for Him always. Since then, my journey has been the most incredible and agonizing experience that I can describe. I have faced many difficult challenges and have hit the points of break

I fell asleep I had a dream I heard a sheep I started to scream I ran away from the field I saw shooting stars It began to reveal My bizarre fear of guitars and milk bars

He sat pondering with stinging eyes outside in the frosty evening air. His head was throbbing with a migraine that carried his thoughts to darker times, times that made his heart burn. Times that now caused his lungs to only inhale, that suffocating feeling the feeling of deaths unbearable hug, the engulfment of pain. He had felt it many times before. The anxiety and stomach nausea was almost always with him though only he knew of it. This boy was fluid in the language of pain. For he had the scars the screams and the sorrow to prove it. Currently his lungs began to fail him only allowing an inhale of agony, no oxygen would be permitted to exit, because the panic would not allow it. His eyes begin to blur like they sometimes would and

On a cold summer night the sun was shining brightly in the sky. The sounds of bears were given to my ears in the breeze as it came through the forest trees. Wolfs could be seen in the tree line hunting their pray. Feeling the rugged rocks that you tread on. Fresh air smells like pine scents with a glowing spray of a river. There was a spiritual being present that made my heart quicken and my body became still. HE came to show the way for HE is the truth, the way, and the life for through HIM we well shall see the face of GOD. This started my first step into what is a fantastic journey is exciting yet wondering what is gone to happen. Each step brings peace no matter what the challenge is because HE leads me. Some search to find a round their

I'm inside the uterus, swimming as fast as I can, It doesn't feel like I'm getting any further..