it's been exactly two weeks, four days, six hours and fifty-two minutes since i tried to off myself.
it's been exactly a week, four days, six hours and fifty-two minutes since i've been admitted into the hell you would call an asylum.
i'm in a fucking mental hospital, locked up, with chains, to a bed like i'm actually crazy. can you believe that?
hell, if my grandma had anything to say about it, she would be having me chained all my life and have my forehead tattooed with the word 'crazy' in big, black bold letters.
i hate that bitch.
again, tugging at the cuffs that were tightly around my wrists, i blow out a deep breath. this is bullshit. this is bullshit and i will not stand for it.
my stomach grumbled for food and my wrists began
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i had to get out of here.
"you don't know you're beautiful, oh, oh, that's what makes you beautiful."
"for the love of the big man up fucking stairs, shut up!"
my loud voice was echoed throughout the tiny room and i almost felt bad when brunette turned around, her mouth formed into an 'o' and her hazel eyes watering a bit. almost.
"well, aren't you a meanie?"
at the choice of words, my eyebrows furrowed together and i kept my hardened gaze on the girl. "what the fuck are you? five?"
"five and a half." the brunette replied cheekily.
my eyes rolled as i again tugged at the restrains, keeping them on the girls. just as she opened her mouth to belt out some more lyrics, i snap. "don't you fucking do it or i swear, i swill smother you in your sleep."
the brunette only smiled as she walked closer to ellie, tapping her nose, causing the red head to open her mouth and jerk her head forward to bite her finger. that only caused the young woman to laugh and mutter out a, "you're so cute."
"i literally fucking hate
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i expected it to be daisy but it was one of the nurses. she was carrying a tray with some fruits that caused my mouth to water and ache for it.
"you're up." the nurse, whos name tagged read as breyer said.
my eyes rolled. "yeah, no shit. you could be a little quieter before entering my room. thanks."
"sorry." no she wasn't. "i was requested to give you food. its fruit."
"whatever."
i could tell nurse whatever was getting pissed off with my attitude but again, i didn't care.
i was locked away like some animal and nobody gave a shit.
"a doctor will be in soon to take the restraints off and give you details about the meeting you will attend. enjoy your food."
i growled in anger, wanting to grab at the nurse and strangle her with my bare hands. this honestly couldn't be happening to me. i wasn't crazy. i don't need to go to meetings and all of this shit just because i tried to off myself.
i should be dead! not here!
i glared at the purely white wall, my hands reaching out to grab the toast, my head leaning down, stuffing it in my mouth, gulping it down once it was chewed up.
i hate
The situation happened during the author’s last day of orientation as a new medical-surgical nurse. The author was passing medications and administered aspirin to a patient as ordered. As the author approached the nurses’ station, she stopped in disbelief as the charge nurse started yelling at her, saying, “Why are you not checking your orders? Why did you give aspirin when there was an order for no anticoagulants? Do you know the patient is having a procedure tomorrow? New grads.” Several physicians and nurse practitioners, along with the author’s coworkers, witnessed
Ratched the head nurse on the ward whose job requires her to be in control.
Parents call their kids crazy, but my parents actually believe I’m crazy, because they put me in a mental hospital. I am not crazy, I had a normal argument, with my parents. I also have a clean record.Lastly, I am mentally stable. Here is my supporting evidence.
I had my first two night shift this week on Sunday 9/13 and Wednesday 9/16. I am on 7 West at Sharp Memorial Hospital and the unit is PCU unit with tele monitoring. The unit had a high census this week, but proper staffing and no codes lead to the nights being relatively calm. I was working with Laura who is not my regular preceptor. She stepped in to work with me for this week while Elle, my regular preceptor, was on vacation. I had a wide variety of patients on my two shifts. The first shift I had a patient that was suffering from an exacerbation of COPD with a history of CHF and a patient that had polycystic kidney disease, which had progressed to end stage renal failure. The second shift I had four patients; one patient had been admitted to the hospital multiple times in the past month for GI bleeds, another patient with a history of diabetes and hypertension was admitted for fever and chills and was later diagnosed with sepsis, the next patient had a history of schizophrenia and was found on the ground in her home and was expected to have been there for over 24 hours resulting in deep tissue injury, and my final patient was suspected to have a history of alcoholism and presented to the hospital with shortness of breath and an oxygen saturation of 89%. The first clinical shift I was shadowing my nurse for a majority of the shift. I was being orientated to the unit and learning where to find supplies on the unit. The second shift I took a
It was a very busy night on M10, call bells ringing non-stop for pain medication, or toileting needs, IV pumps alarming, concerned family members coming to the nursing station, numerous patient admissions from urgent care and PACU. I received nursing handoff on all my patients from the day shift, gave handoff to my patient care technicians, and we had our nightly nursing huddle in the station. After hearing everyones concerns about their high risk patients, I wanted to get out on the floor as early as possible to complete my assessments, and administer my medications to leave time for the many uncertainties that my gut instinct warned me would occur. I was able to finish all my patient assessments, and pass my medications earlier than usual, and when this occurs, I always do my best to help my co-workers if they have fallen behind. I went around asking everyone if they needed assistance, and indeed one of my fellow RN’s needed help moving one of my former patients closer to the station, because she had been hypotensive. I greeted Ms. T and her face lit up like a Christmas tree, I asked her how she was feeling and the smile she had on her face immediately turned into a grimace. I assured her, that we would do our best to make her more comfortable once we settled into the new room.
On February 10, 2015 I was admitted to West Regional Hospital for being suicidal. My friend, Sadye, told the counselors about how I had temptations to drive off the road and hurt myself. I was then escorted to the hospital by two police officers. After I got to the hospital, I was met by a third police officer who took me up the elevator. When we finally arrived at the decided floor, a lady took me into a room to ask me many questions about suicide and what led me to it. After the interview, I had to wear clothes that looked like a purple prisoner-like outfit. I wasn't allowed to have any outside items like jewelry, cell phones, or even my own pair of socks. I stayed in the hospital for a little over a week, everyday I had to fill out paperwork
"What the fuck?" I said again and pulled my hand away. I guess I was a bit too loud since the girl next to me stirred in her sleep and woke up with a yawn.
Some of the other prisoners have cell-mates. They decided that I was too dangerous and put me in solitary confinement. I've forgotten how to talk because I have no reason to use my voice. I used to
In that moment, I was thinking it that’s not bad. I was imagining something worse than this. After the first week orientation, I started by myself in a different floor. In this floor, much of the patient are total care and you should take them out of bed every day in the morning to the dinner room. In addition, the other CNA’s are not helpful and always they are short staff. On my first day, I tried to do my best, but I spend too much time just with one of the patient because she has a shower and the Hoyer lift was not working properly and no one helps me to take her out of bed. I ask the nurse if she can help me, but she replied to me “No, I’m so busy giving medications, find someone else to help you” but no one help me. I decided to give a bed bath and let the patient dress and ready on the bed waiting for someone to help me later. I continue with other patients but I faced so many problems because I did not know the patient and I did get enough supplies. Usually the other CNA’s arrived early and took almost everything for them but, they told me that usually they do not have enough supplies. I was feeling mad at that moment because nobody helps me and nothing was working
I totally agree with you, Dr.Smith. I had a colleague who was at her last trimester, almost approaching her date of delivery. One day, a patient got mad at something and this nurse happened to be standing near the patient, got stabbed on her abdomen. He used a clamp to stab her that was in use to clamp his foley’s catheter. With the grace of God, nothing seriously happened to that nurse or her baby. Still, she had to get admitted to induce her baby. There were no actions taken against that patient, except for a psychiatric consultation. This has happened in the previous hospital where I used to work.
I still don’t know how I ended up in a jail cell at 3am on a sunday morning. actually scratch that, I know exactly how I ended up here, my friend had decided it would be fun to go clubbing and drag me along, next thing I know, she’s disappeared and I’m in a catfight with a fellow tipsy girl who claims I was looking at her boyfriend.
There was still no one here, not even the nurses. It's my fault really, I yelled at the nurses, sent my own mother away.
Then, I asked her to please come to me if she had any concerns about my care. Then, she replied “I just think you are slow,’ I replied, “I do not agree, I am organized and finish work in a timely manner, without errors. Later in the week I went to lunch when another supervisor stopped me on my way back to the unit and took me in a room, I said, “what did I do now?” She told me Candy was trying to build a case against me, that I was a good nurse and to be careful. I did not understand, I had done nothing to Candy, also she informed me to double check and recheck my medication and while I am rechecking mine, also check Candy’s. Likewise, if I found errors or omissions, wait till the desk area was full and confront her. I returned to the desk and immediately in front of the supervisor, she jumped on me for being late, and the supervisor intervened, explained she had detained me. Therefore, I did as the supervisor had asked and confronted Candy only one time and she never bothered me again. Consequently, Candy was terminated two months later for stealing drugs on the unit and had to admit herself in rehab, apparently, it was her second time. Consequently, I stayed employed for 14 more years at that organization where I received my experience in intensive care.
I stood there like a condemned man. “Suffer criminal!”, I told myself, “You deserve much worse!”
My resident was an 82-year old female with an admitting diagnoses of contusion of the left hip, and the inability to ambulate. She was a very sweet woman, and very alert and orientated. While I was taking her vital signs she informed me that she wasn’t feeling too good. Then she asked me if I was allowed to transfer her into the recliner because that chair is more comfortable for her. I transferred her into the recliner and she told me that made her feel a lot better and that she was sorry for bothering me. I told her that my job is to provide her with basic care and comfort, and that I am here to focus on her well-being.