Whoever We Are Loss Finds Us Anna Quindlen Summary

Since the start of time, and the preceding generations, death has impacted people and the way they act. A sudden, or even an expected death of a loved one, takes a toll on a person. It’s human nature for people to process and want to make sense of death and the loss it leaves behind. The five stages of grief reflect this process of dealing with the loss of a loved one. Through these stage of grieving, people can get lost either searching for answers or trying to get past it. In Hamlet, William Shakespeare depicts the role human nature plays in the striving for answers and justice surrounding death. Even though Hamlet was written early in the seventeenth century, the depiction of death and human nature still rings true today; people and

Painful as it may be, such experiences brings home the finality of death. Something deep within us demands a confrontation with death. A last look assures us that the person we loved is, indeed, gone forever.” (108) Cable finishes his essay by asking, Tim if his job ever depressed him. Tim in reply says, “No it doesn’t, and I do what I can for people and take satisfaction in enabling relatives to see their loved ones as they were in real life.” (108) After reading this essay I feel as though sometimes we don’t understand death so therefore we do not talk much about it. By reading about what goes on after your loved one dies and is sent to these places to be prepared and ready for burial, it helps to understand why morticians and funeral directors do what they do. Knowing that someone enjoys taking the responsibility in providing that comfort in a sorrowful time makes me appreciate these people in these occupations a bit

“What the dead don’t know piles up, though we don’t notice it at first,” is an insight in Roger Angell’s descriptive memoir, “Over the Wall” (414). Emotional responses, stimulating thoughts and solid feelings are elicited through the use of personal reflection, regarding the death of his wife, Carol. This literary nonfiction, memoir uses the present tense, a constant tone, and an informal view to help add immediacy, by keeping the reader involved step by step as the author connects his personal present and past experiences regarding death. Readers are continually intrigued by Angell’s literary nonfiction essay, with provoking thoughts focusing on death, while using figurative language to keep Carol alive, with the use of vivid personal reflections and descriptive personal experiences.

Many people define their lives by the relationships within their family. They are someone’s daughter, someone’s wife, or someone’s mother or father. The loss of a family member, especially due to death, creates a radical readjustment to people’s day to day lives and how they see and feel about themselves. Sometimes the process of grief can last over several years and how it is mentally processed and dealt with is different for everyone. “Mud” by Geoffrey Forsyth, shows an insightful view of a grieving man who had already lost his father and grandmother and is now just coming to terms with the loss of his wife two years prior. The entire story is written in first person point of view which allows for the reader to fully engage themselves in the grief and strife of the narrator’s life. Geoffrey’s story “Mud” begins in the home of the narrator where he encounters these dead family members and has to decide if he is ready to move on from his grief and say goodbye or stay behind and be consumed by it.

Loss is a phenomenon that is experienced by all. Death is experienced by family members as a unique and elevated form of loss which is modulated by potent stages of grief. Inevitably, everyone will lose someone with whom they had a personal relationship and emotional connection and thus experience an aftermath that can generally be described as grief. Although bereavement, which is defined as a state of sorrow over the death or departure of a loved one, is a universal experience it varies widely across gender, age, and circumstance (definitions.net, 2015). Indeed the formalities and phases associated with bereavement have been recounted and theorized in literature for years. These philosophies are quite diverse but

Each individual has a unique way of coping with death, and this is evident throughout Christina Rossetti’s, “Remember” and W. H. Auden’s “Stop all of the Clocks”.

The grieving that individuals experience with death is unique, but the main stages are universal across cultures (Axelrod, 2017). There are five stages of grief. Nicolas Wolterstorff’s story, Lament for a Son, addresses these five stages as he tries to find joy after the loss of his son. The meaning and significance of death in light of the Christian narrative is also addressed in the story. Having a hope of the resurrection can help comfort individuals in situations similar to Wolterstorff (Wolterstorff, 1978).

When someone goes through a time of grief, it is only natural to find a way to deal with the hardships and until it eventually goes away, but people may come to realize that the loss can never be forgotten. This process of grieving and fighting through hard times to finally come to peace and accept reality is also reflected in literature such as “Hold Tight”. The short story ¨Hold Tight¨ by Amy Bloom shows that when people deal with grief, people may try to find ways to cope with the pain by letting out their anger on others or becoming self-destructive, even though it may not be possible to completely forget the woe.

To begin with, the death of Aunt Bernie brings great grief to the narrator and affects his performance at work. His reaction to the event exemplifies the way the society has taught people to react to sorrow. After Bernie’s death, he comes to work not in high spirits as required for a stripper, and female guests are disappointed in him. As a result, Mr. Frendt advises him, “Grief is good, grief is fine, but too much grief, as we all know, is excessive” (Saunders 19). The statement makes it evident that the society does not expect one to grieve to the extent of affecting their daily life. Specifically, Frendt discourages the narrator from mourning too much “like one of those Comanche ladies who bite off their index fingers when a loved one dies” (Saunders 19). Through such words, the author alludes to the culture of this community that requires people

April resists public modes of grieving in favor of the more intimate, personal, and domestic setting with someone she knows. She is surprised and a little repulsed that life did not stop after 9/11. That “stores would never open again” that “businesses [would] shut down” that “lawyers quit their practices and run into the woods” (145). Instead life went on. Rather than stop and grieve, Americans rushed to return to normalcy and sought to commercialize grief in newspapers like they did “movie reviews” or “the bridge column” (145).

The concept and belief of honor in the Columbian culture in Chronicle of a Death Foretold is one of the deciding aspects of the character's actions, motives, and beliefs. Nobody questions the actions taken to preserve ones honor because it is such an important moral trait that one must cherish. In this society a man or woman without honor is an outcast to the community and to the culture. In Chronicle of a Death Foretold two twin brothers are burdened with defending this tradition of honor. The brothers find out that their sister has lost her virginity before marriage and she claims that Santiago Nasar is to blame. To regain the honor of their sister, and their family the brothers believe it is their duty to kill Santiago Nasar. Could such

“Ordinary people” everywhere are faced day after day with the ever so common tragedy of losing a loved one. As we all know death is inevitable. We live with this harsh reality in the back of our mind’s eye. Only when we are shoved in the depths of despair can we truly understand the multitude of emotions brought forth. Although people may try to be empathetic, no one can truly grasp the rawness felt inside of a shattered heart until death has knocked at their door. We live in an environment where death is invisible and denied, yet we have become desensitized to it. These inconsistencies appear in the extent to which families are personally affected by death—whether they

The author uses several types of poetic terms in this poem to develop the theme of a person accepting grief in their life. One poetic term she used was a metaphor. The metaphor is “Ah, grief, I should not treat you like a homeless dog.” Although grief is not a type of dog, the author wants us to think of grief in the same way that we would think about a homeless dog. The same phrase can also be considered a simile. The author intends for us to think of grief as being like a homeless dog. Another way that the author expressed her theme was by using a specific kind of repetition like anaphora. Several words are repeated at the beginning of two or more lines and sentences in the poem. These words are “you,” “your,” “my,” and “and.” There are also several phrases that are repeated throughout the poem. These phrases are “your own,” “I should,” and “you need.” She uses these repetitive words and phrases in the poem to describe a conversation that a person is having with grief.

The passing of a loved one is a universal experience and every person will experience loss or heartache, at some point in their life. Some people obviously appear upset, some do not, grief is individual, dependent on; age, gender, development stage, personality, their normal stress reactions, the support available, their relationships or attachments, other death experiences, how others react to their own grief around them (Thompson & Hendry, 2012).

The mother's road to finding closure over her son's death is much longer than her husband's. Her feelings throughout the poem are of