Identity of an Adoptee
As parents begin the adoption process it is common to feel anxious about the emotional bond that must be created and many times will choose a closed adoption in order to “cut all ties” with the biological mother. Some parents worry how that secrecy will affect the child later in life and chooses to keep an open relationship with the birthmother. Furthermore, adoption is a delicate process and parents should be aware on how adoption has been associated with the feeling of abandonment that leads to the later struggle of the child’s understanding their identity.
Society has planted these roots in the minds of parents that adoption should be accompanied with secrecy which emphasizes the idea that “different” means “deficient”. They believe that the information of the birth mother is threatening information against the adoptive parents, however they need to understand that this information helps fill in the gaps of the adoptee’s identity
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Theorists have discussed how identity is formed through “phases of openness and experimentation, and phases of consolidation” (Noy-Sharav 2005). Adoption is considered an “as if” situation (Barbara 1998), meaning that people still believe that “biology inevitably trumps social environment when we consider what defines a family” (Goldber, 2005). In a study focused primarily on interracial adoption, the authors discussed how before children are able to fully understand the concept of adoption, they are already being affected by the difference of race very early in their lifetime (Friedlander 1999). Most children adopted into an interracial family will have little to no recollection of their birth family and culture. In addition, stranger and peers often bring up the differences of the parents and child that can lead to a child to struggle to develop a strong identification with their adoptive
My mother was all I had in this world. It has been two weeks and I
Adoption is the process in which a person takes over the parenting of someone else’s child and permanently transfers all the responsibilities and rights from the biological parent or parents. Giving up a child for adoption is a very difficult decision for a mother to make. Today, many children are being parented by a single parent, a grandparent, a stepparent, foster parent or other parent figure. Making adoption an option is done by providing loving, responsible, and legally permanent parents to a child when their biological parents are not able or will not take care of them.(Carter)
May cause different emotions for adopted child as they have the right to know their origins
Many critics of Transracial adoption debate that white families are not capable to benefit black children develop a black identity role. Because white people do not know the feeling of having been discriminated or criticized among black children. So the author feels that white people cannot
How does it feel to be adopted? Has life been altered as a result of being adopted? These questions have never fazed my view of being adopted. Awareness of being adopted began as far back as I can recall and has never been a taboo family topic. Adoption didn’t affect my life in any sort of way as a child. As I matured, the realization of the impact being adopted has had on my life has evolved. This insight created a new level of gratitude for my family and my life.
“I want to be like my adoptive mother, but my birth mother says I’m like her. I don’t know what to do or who I am. My whole life is messed up. It’s not my fault. It can’t be fixed,” said a girl adopted into an open adoption (Byrd). An open adoption is a process in which the birth parents and the adoptive parents know each other and are involved in the adopted child’s life. A closed adoption is when there is no contact at all and no identifying information is given between birth and adoptive parents (Byrd). While both are common to today’s society, closed adoptions allow opportunities for the adoptive parents to raise their kids without the interference of birth parents (Bender).
When looking at adoption there is a large variety of studies that can be done with adoptive children and their development. How does the child attach to his or her adoptive parents? How does the child view themselves in regards to a family unit when siblings are involved? How do the parents view the child’s placement in the family after a certain period of time has passed? All of these variables can be observed in study after study. But for sake of this paper, we are going to take a look at what researchers found in Romanian orphanages and how these children connected and attached with their adoptive mothers and parents. We will also look at a study
In the 1960s, adoptees began The Adoption Reform Movement to make sealed adoption records accessible. Before then, traditional or closed adoptions were thought to be the best option for everyone involved in the adoption triangle. This triad consists of the adoptee, adoptive parents, and biological parents. In a closed adoption, the adoptee is not allowed access to medical records and does not know their birth parents. Prior to the reform, people did not consider the ethical or moral problems that would arise from these kind of adoptions. The belief was that sealed records would protect everyone, but this is not the case. As adoptees grew into adults, the demand for more information on their birth parents increased. This led to the debate of whether or not adoptees were entitled to know the identity of their biological parents. The opposition from birth mothers appeared almost immediately after the reform set about. These mothers were not ready to give up their own rights to make the decision between open or closed adoption. Even though biological parents have the ability to choose, adoptees have the right to know their biological parents because of the search process being emotionally damaging, their need to access medical records, and their development as a child.
For those who are a part of the adoption world one of the most hotly debated issues is whether birth records should be open or closed to adoptees. With this issue comes strong feelings on both sides. In most states adoption records are fully sealed and inaccessible, unless the adoptee petitions the court. In 16 states these records are fully or partially available upon request with no court involvement, and also may depend upon when you were born. In a few states records are completely prohibited and the adoptee will never have any access to them. Alaska and Kansas have always made original birth records available.
Thesis: Transracial adoptees family situation affects many aspects of the adopted child’s life. Do these children have identity formation difficulties during adolescence and are there any significant differences between adoptees and birth children?
Children who are pulled out of their normal environment and inserted into different surroundings face an identity crisis due to the importance of identity in determining who one truly is. In a study, Trolly, Wallin, and Hansen discovered that fewer than fifty percent of the parents of foreign children felt that their children were only somewhat aware of their birth culture (Hollingsworth 48:209). These children lack a sense of who they really are and later in life will become confused on why they differ from their new families. Though it is often a painful topic that parents choose not to bring up, it is important that children understand their background because it results in a better quality of life. However, the prevalence of “cultural socializations” was low amongst Caucasian families who adopted Asian children (Deater-Deckard, Johnston, Petrill, Saltsman, and Swim 56:390). It is made clear that Westerners lack the cultural knowledge necessary to properly educate their internationally adopted children about the culture the children come from. This can result in a variety of psychological implications due to the significant effect of identity on the health of people of color (Deater-Deckard, Johnston, Petrill, Saltsman, and Swim 56:390). These implications tend to be internalized rather than externalized. In the same study, Chinese adoptees displayed the possibility of behavior such as hyperactivity, aggression,
Secondly, birth parent’s intense stress can continue into later years like on the child’s birthday and while they think of what type of person their son or daughter might have become under their care. For example, an adoptee might study and learn to play instruments very well with the adoptive parents, but if the child would have grown – up with his/her birth parents. They might would have been a great artist, but since this was not the case. The child may not develop those skills as the birth parents would have hoped. Through all this loss and guilt, the relationship among both parents may fall apart because of how each one feels about the adoption and their parent’s lack of support will distance them all even farther from one another. A major case is when the birth mother may have to leave her home and family due to pregnancy, which would degrade her educational and work status in the community. (Information Gateway) The birth parents have to encounter much hardship and denial to of most of an adoption plan, but more current issues, such as their shame, identity, and long- term issues effect them as well.
Adoption is metamorphosing into a radical new process that is both sweeping the nation and changing it. But this process is not an easy one, there are many steps to go through. Through research it is made a lot easier. Adoption is a also a highly visible example of a social institution that has benefits from and been reshaped by both the Internet and the exponential growth of alternative lifestyles, from single to transracial to gay. It is accelerating our transformation into a more multicultural society; even as it helps redefine out understanding of “family.” The process includes three main steps including a type of adoption, the techniques for location a baby for adoption, arranging
Adopting a child is an experience that promises to bring great joy as it changes a couple or individual’s life forever. But what happens if the mother of that child wants to endorse their child? Those are the issues that many adopting parents and birth-right mothers are facing today. Many biological mothers want their child back. There are many concerns for adopting parents to know- that there is the possibly that the birth mother may file for the child. As a birth mother or the adopting parent one must realize consequences that could lay ahead.
As the transition of adoption is finished, a problem of identity arises within the child. It may be months, or even years, depending on the age of the child. Since the child has come from a different background or heritage, the cultural normal is considered different for the child. This is especially the case when