No Strings Attached: Describing Our Family’s Dynamics
My mom is not the first family member we have taken into our home. In the past, as a family, we have tried to split rent and utilities and food and make everything fair, but it had the opposite effect and just led to scorekeeping putting a huge strain on our relationships. Our opinion is family should be the people you love the most, not the people you resent for eating the last bag of chips and leaving the lights on all weekend when no one was home. While still living in Spokane, WA, we had tried various approaches to solve this problem and eventually ended up on the “no strings attached” approach to sharing our home. We just refuse to keep score.
We have always believed a home should be a safe place, not a battleground over frivolous matters. We just refuse to keep score.
What we discovered was it took the stress off our relationship, and we started spending quality time with the family and enjoying each other’s company.
In the past since adopting this idea of no strings attached, we have always maintained the house and paid all of the normal bills and utilities and provided the majority of the groceries. We always have a loaner car we keep around for running errands or getting to school and work.
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All of it conducted by my mom because she could not understand how we could manage to let her live with us for free. My mom is a proud woman who believes she has to carry her weight and do her fair share. In the end, we told mom to decide on how she wanted to "help" us and what made her comfortable, and she made the decisions on what she wanted to pay. We required nothing of her other than the pleasure of her company and the opportunity for her to become closer to the grandkids we were helping
My mom was recently going through a financial struggle. Her and her husband were going through a rough patch in their marriage, so they took a break. She was living alone and unemployed. I felt like I had a responsibility to help out since I'm the oldest child, but there wasn’t much I
This is the first time since we lived here that I have not felt safe in my home.
my job, and was facing eviction. I was twenty-six at that time, my son was seven, and my daughter was
When the oldest siblings were able to have jobs they helped my parents with bills at home. My parents never forced them to help but because they always helped us when we were in need my siblings and I always felt like it was our duty to return the good that our parents had done for us. No one complained and no one ever denied my parents when they needed something. To this day my oldest siblings will still
My younger brother and I have always lived with our mom up until almost two years ago. We used to live in Illinois with my step dad and his daughter. My step dad had a sister who was on drugs and ended up losing her kids because of it. My mom started hanging out with her and it resulted in her trying the drug in order to lose weight. That one try was just enough for my moms addiction to start and her relationship with my step dad to end.
My grandmother resided with one of my aunts for the last 15 years of her life. As her health started to fail her, she became more and more dependent. My grandmother was always a very independent woman and the rock of our
List your current source(s) of income (e.g., salary from job, interest from savings, alimony/child support, even parents)
The topic of home defense and the extent of force a homeowner is allowed to use depends on the state one resides in as well as the state’s laws on home defense. In many states, like the state of New Jersey, there is what is known as, “Duty to Retreat” laws. These states are predominantly located in the north and do not allow the homeowner to take much action against an intruder. The “Duty to Retreat” is a duty of which citizens of a particular state are required by law to first look for a path of retreat before confronting the intruder. If the path of retreat does not present itself, the home owner can then take action. This “action” however, does not allow the homeowner to forcibly engage with the intruder. The intruder must first show signs of aggression towards the homeowner or their family. In the event that the intruder does show signs of aggression, the homeowner is only allowed to counter with equal force. For example, if the intruder only has their hands to fight the homeowner, the homeowner cannot draw a firearm and discharge at the intruder. This is the mentality of many states across the nation when it comes to defending one’s self or personal property. However, the other half of the states in the United States employ different tactics, which allow the homeowner to stand their ground against an intruder. These states are predominantly located in the south, with the exception of three northern states: Alaska, New Hampshire and Pennsylvania. Within these states, a
When I was a three week old newborn, Social Services decided that my mother and father were no longer fit to raise my sister and I. My mother was an alcoholic who would soon be in prison, my father was not yet an American citizen, and my parents were in the midst of a divorce. Instead of allowing my sister and I to be split up and sent to separate foster homes, my grandparents brought us into their home for what was intended to be a temporary length of time. This temporary length of
I know they are not as financially set as my family because we are different as chalk from cheese, but they do not think about what can happen if they leave their house alone without informing a trusted one because they know that their neighborhood was buzzing like a beehive. That was a mistake in their part. Also if ever being in their situation of their house being burglarized I know that my mom would not blame us like his mom blamed him and his siblings because to me I believe that his moms angry words were bullets to them and in contrast
During the first quarter of General Financial Literacy, we randomly selected a mock family. I had the Kraft family. Edith Kraft, a postal worker, was a single mom part time raising her young son, Micah. Working at the post office provided Edith $2,593.72 net pay a month as well as free insurance. The Kraft family had to pay $40 for Ms. Kraft’s dancing lessons, $50 to care for their cat, $100 for Keith, the son’s, college fund, and finally $147.50 to raise Keith. Ms. Kraft’s retirement package cost $288.49. The house, which was bought not rented, cost a total of $564.67, which includes property tax and insurance. Water and sewer cost $30.62 monthly. Power cost $51.60. The car cost $255.98 a month, which covered insurance, gas, and repairs. Ms. Kraft had the low cost food plan which totaled to $156.40 a month. Life insurance for Ms. Kraft costed $10.92 a month. In February, the Krafts had a cellphone plan that cost them $49.99 a month and digital cable which cost $66.95 a month. After the first month, I discovered they could not afford that, so I changed their plan. In March, to better their situation and save a few extra dollars, the Keith family got Netflix for $9.99 a month and Xfinity for $29.99 a month.
I'm married now, my husband doesn't work every day in construction and I don't work alot myself but we're both working on getting more financially stable. If I can't pay for bills now I call the company that's attached to them and see if we can work out a payment plan. I don't buy extravagent things from Amazon if I don't have the money. I won't hire a taxi, go out to McD's or have coffee out if that's going to eat into something more important I should be purchasing.
This helped to show them right from wrong. At my house, we have rules that they must follow. If they were going to live at our house, they would have to respect the rules. My mom began to sit down every week with my aunt and talk about her money issues. My Aunt Willa had a lot of debt because she did not know how to manage her money.
financial reasons before it was ever performed. Despite this, for me, my mother’s role in
My housing arrangements consist of my sister, mom, her boyfriend, and myself living in a three bedroom house. My mom and her boyfriend share a bedroom and my sister and I have our own bedrooms. We also have a pet cat. Chores are done daily such as vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the bathroom etc. Breakfast is fed every morning and lunch is taken care of at school. Dinner is made every night following the dishes getting done afterwards. Expenses at home are paid for by my mom. The gas bill, electric bill, and water bill are some of the expenses that are paid for. I myself pay for my own car insurance.