Opening Doors for Women: Etiquette, or Systematic Oppression?
For generations, men holding doors open for women has been considered common courtesy. However, researchers are now certain that this is an example of deep-rooted misogyny masquerading as chivalry. Researchers are calling this, among other prevalent actions, “benevolent sexism”, stating that it is much more difficult to recognize than more aggressive examples of oppression.
Spotting a benevolent sexist isn’t easy, so it is important that you make yourself aware of the signs. That way, you can call it out when you see it and be a small time hero for womankind. Holding the door for women isn’t the only tell-tale sign of a benevolent sexist, there are several others that you
…show more content…
Most people write off that behavior as “tradition” or “chivalry”, however, it is much darker than that. The one true reason that a man would refuse to let a woman pay for, or at the very least split a bill, stems from a deep feeling of gender superiority. Men like this see women as lesser people and likely not much more than objects. The fact that this train of thought still exists today, is disgusting, to say the least.
Other examples of benevolent sexism include men offering women their jacket or coat on a brisk day, giving women nicknames such as “honey” or “baby” (“baby” is my least favorite, it implies that women have the mental capacity and the usefulness of a child), complimenting a woman on her looks, exclusively watching men’s sports while showing little to no interest in women’s leagues, and many others. If your man believes that women shouldn’t be equally represented in the US military, then you might be dating a sexist.
When a man says that he prefers “traditional values” or a “traditional home”, it is crucial that we all understand what that man is actually saying; “I don’t think that women are worthy of a healthy lifestyle that us men get to enjoy, and thus they should be held back from their true
To admit or to label oneself as a feminist is to accept a whirlwind of judgment from those around you. It is without a doubt that the word “Feminism” or “Feminist” turns heads, and not necessarily for the right reasons. Many have resorted to mocking, disagreeing, and/or hating Feminism without even having a good grasp of what it is. The stigmas that feminists face are that they are radical, extremist, liberal, lesbians who hate men, refuse to shave and enjoy burning bras (Lee).Conversely, feminists are principally advocates for social justice and equality as well as aim for the establishment of equally divided power between the sexes. It is obvious that many are unaware of and uneducated on the misogynistic injustices plaguing our world and the toxic environment we all live in- both women and men. Feminism is a positive concept that works to eliminate injustices between both sexes and to establish the value of women, thus should be treated as such a concept instead of being a forbidden idea.
Traditional gender roles are typical roles for men and women based on biological and social differences. The book describes two benefits of traditional gender roles for males as: Higher Income and Other Job Related Advantages and Less Domestic Work and Marital Stress. Men are expected to always provide a stable income for the home. As personal experience in my household, my dad’s paychecks were always higher than my mom’s. He worked as head of security of a grade school making over $3,000+ a month, meanwhile my mom working as a homecare nurse made only $2,000. Because my dad’s income was higher, he was always expected to pay majority of the bills such as rent, cable, lights, car notes, and insurance. My mom paid for the smaller bills such
Before the second segment begins, where a modern case study is applied to Marilyn Frye’s theory of oppression; it seems necessary to briefly mention a few ways that Frye believes that oppression can be surfaced unknowingly between men and women. The first example touches on the simple actions that men do for women such as opening a door, “The arresting of vision at a microscopic level yields such common confusion as that about the male door-opening ritual. This ritual, which is remarkably widespread across classes and races, puzzles many people, some of whom do and some of whom do not find it offensive. Look at the scene of the two people approaching a door. The male steps slightly ahead and opens the door. The male holds the door open while the female glides through. Then the male goes through. The door closes after them” (12). This particular quote receives a lot of backlash, as many people feel that this act is simply a helpful gesture between a man and a woman. This type of gesture is often times defined as chivalry. Frye argues that these “chivalrous” gestures are condoned oppressive behaviors, “The gallant gestures have no practical meaning. Their meaning is symbolic. The door-opening and similar services provided are services which really are needed by people who are for one reason or another incapacitated – unwell, burdened with parcels, etc. So the message is that women are incapable. The detachment of the acts from the concrete realities of what women need and do
It is my belief that the sexism in this act lied firmly in the way he chuckled, and shook his head condescendingly at me. It was as though he were thinking to himself how cute it was that a little woman like me to hold open the door for a strong, capable man such as himself. In laughing at this simple, objectively polite act he confirmed the thought-process behind this “chivalrous act”. Men hold open the door for woman, not because it’s necessarily polite, but because men subconsciously believe women to be weak. Not only that, but consider the fact that rarely do men hold open the door for men. This is no doubt because men consider other men to be capable of handling themselves in all manners, especially in things as simple as holding open a door.
Over the last several decades, great strides have been made when it comes to eliminating sexism and progressing towards gender equality. However, sexism is still ingrained in our everyday culture. This is evident in the fact that in 2017 women earn about 80 cents to a man’s dollar and are less likely to be promoted within the workplace. It’s an unfortunate fact the most women will experience some form of sexism throughout their lives. In this paper, I will address my personal experiences with both hostile and benevolent sexism, how the two forms of sexism differ, and how these experiences have affected me.
Today in society it can be agreed that women have indeed gained many rights that were not accessible to them 100 years before. Although, despite the mentality that men and women are treated equally there are still very many discrepancies between the treatment of genders. Many of which can be attributed to the expectations placed on the genders, gender roles between both genders, and women in the workplace. These issues have caused a great rift to form between the genders, a rift that has caused one gender to claim dominance over the other and this can develop a sense of inferiority by the submissive gender.
Sexism is generally associated with women but, when researching the effects it also has on men, my opinion has shifted. One of the first times we identify sexism dates back to the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries. At this time, due to a woman’s deceitful moral compass, settlers had the belief that women had to rely on men. Due to the religious beliefs at this time, and the story of Adam and Eve, women were deemed corrupt and untrustworthy. Feminine sexism has been around for decades but, we are just recently recognizing that men are victims of this disturbing phenomenon. (Tracy)
Porter, Katz, and Plait have very similar arguments. The problems lie within society’s cultural system. In order for there to be change adult men need to speak up and set examples. Instead of remaining quiet, men need to provide “powerful models of anti-sexist manhood to young men” (Katz). These expectations that society puts on men need to be diminished. It needs to be “made clear that sexist attitudes and behaviors are unwelcomed”
Two weeks ago, Feminist Frequency launched a crowdfunding campaign for Ordinary Women, our new video series about incredible, defiant women throughout history, and we’re pleased to say that we’re on our way, having raised over $73,000 from more than 1,200 supporters so far. Your generosity and enthusiasm mean everything to us, especially in light of the pushback we get every time we speak up or speak at all.
Martin Luther King Jr. once said “our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” However, I will not be silent. Sexism is a thing of the past, present, and future. Women have never been seen as equal to men. This idea and concept affect how women carry out their lives. Women may act different or speak different just based on society's thoughts about their gender. In To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee and in today’s society it is clear that because of women’s perceived “weakness”, men now dominate women legally, physically and financially.
For decades, history tells us a lot about sexism: women are deemed to be inferior to men. Since the 20th century, many women and feminist groups have protested to gain equal rights; these groups claim that—to a great extent—discrimination against women still exists in today’s society. But is this really true? Are women still heavily discriminated in the United States? Logic says otherwise—sexism might still be present today but it’s certainly not as bad as people claim it to be. The issue is much smaller than how feminists portray it.
Cook, clean, please, repeat. This was the typical lifestyle for women throughout most of history. Women were the charming possessions that belonged to their husbands; their power was their husband’s power. They were not individuals, and it was infrequent for a woman to rise above her peers and do something important with her life. Currently, much has changed.
While sexism is no longer as overt a practice as in the past, it is arguably just as pervasive. bell hooks’ life as an academic has been spent trying to breakdown the existent sexist barriers, which have prohibited women from achieving equality with men.
Annette Bair and Marilyn Friedman have opposing views on whether women have distinct moral perspectives. Like Friedman, I believe that women have no different moral perspectives than men. Some people, like Bair, think that women base their moral perspectives on merely trust and love and men base theirs on justice. Friedman points out that care and justice coincide . People use justice to decide what is appropriate in caring relationships and care is brought into account when determining what is just. Since these two moral perspectives correspond, gender does not distinguish different moral perspectives.
“Sexism is the foundation on which all tyranny is built. Every social form of hierarchy and abuse is modeled on male-over- female domination”(Dworkin).