Another video to edited I thought to myself, I didn't want to edit or even do videos anymore. I don't know what happen a couple days ago I was really happy and now just became depress. I got up from my chair and started walking to the bathroom to have a shower. After I have a shower and dry up I look in the mirror and stare at myself. I saw myself as fat, ugly and worthless I wonder why the guys was my friends as I was a waste of space I don't deserve to live. I look down on the razor no not now I been clean for years as say to myself well the sidemen doesn't care if I die neither does my fans and the guys are sleeping so they won't know. I remember when I use to cut myself the blood running down my arm and the pain was gone instantly. I lifted up the razor. Two big cuts across my arm one for the memories of cutting and one for being worthless. …show more content…
I feel like i am part of the world when i have scars on my arm. The downside of cutting is the depressions always come back the next day like my happiness being taken away and i have to fight for it like a romance book where the prince have to fight the dragon to get his girl back well its like being only the dragon is my depression and i have to cut the dragons neck to kill it like my skin and the girl well my happiness. No one even notice why i wear long sleeves all the time not even my best friends know. Friday, 8:23pm Sidemen
As someone who has dealt with the loneliness and pain of self harm I would like to share with you the affects and health risks of self harm. Contrary to popular belief self harm is not only done for the attention of others. Sometimes it’s a way that people
You said small cut with no blood, I did a medium cut that did have some blood. No I wasn’t doing it because I was depressed It because I don’t want you doing it, no matter how depressed you are. There are always other options. So you can either harm yourself and subsequently harm me, or you can take one of the other routes. It is your choice. I didn’t say any of this to make you sad, I said this to prove a message. I am truly sorry if I made you sad, but this is my policy and I will keep it for as long as I live. I love you and this is why I did this. I love you with all my heart, and that will never change. My feelings you will continue to grow every single day, it has already broken out of its case its became that big. I am here to please you, so anything you want, you ask for. I want to make you happy. I will strive to make you happy. I will go to the ends of the earth to make you happy (the earth doesn't have an end,therefore I will never stop trying). You are probably getting sick and tired of me rambling on and on, but I could go forever and given the time, I
Throughout the past year I went through a great deal of undertakings that caused me to become more experienced with my skills and how to overcome various challenges. These really built up my character and the way I am today. In all aspects, this past year consisted of going to Killington, Vermont, my brother going into the Air Force, meeting him in Texas for his graduation of basic training, completing a double backflip on a trampoline, landing a front flip on flat ground, accomplishment of a 2 ½ front flip on a diving board, getting 2nd at leagues, and competing in districts. All of these activities have advanced me in a skill or challenged me to an extent.
Teens and young adults resort to various outlets with hopes of coping with the pressures they face. Some stress-relieving activities involve eating comforting food or watching TV. For some, however, these activities do not provide adequate stress relief, so they attempt to escape their anxieties through a recently recognized self-mutilating disorder called “cutting.” While gaining more attention in recent years, cutting is still not a well-known practice, yet an estimated 700 out of every 100,000 individuals self-mutilate (Froeschle). Even celebrities like Angelina Jolie have admitted to cutting (Mann). The best way to discourage the practice of cutting is to learn more about
Jerry wakes up in a dissociative state still hungover from the previous night’s drug binge, nullifying the pain with a fluffy, symmetrical line of Peruvian cocaine and a tightly packed bowl of luminescent green, trichome plastered cannabis nug sourced from California out of his Illadelph bong; naturally, Jerry was quite the aficionado in recreational drug use and progressive dependency. As dopamine floods his prefrontal cortex he’s invigorated with a renewed sense of grandiosity; he looks in the mirror, his eyes are sunken in, the pallor of his complexion is ghostly, an apparition of a once revered public figure. He averts his eyes to his many awards and commendations for a brief moment, before the cannabis takes effect. He brushes
Failure is truly negative if we choose to not learn from it. When we face setbacks and difficulties, we are given golden opportunities to grow as people. Learning from our shortcomings makes us wiser, stronger, and unveils a chance to turn an undesirable outcome into a building block of character. My hockey career has been a sinusoidal trail of highs and lows, but I always learned from the downturns.
There are whole blogs dedicated to it. Communities of people who had joined me in my misery, had fed my self-imposed solitude and my need to harm myself. “Don’t let the food win,” they had said. Others said, “Cutting is fine, it’s a release.” I felt like a failure for having been found out, my shame at being thwarted almost overriding my anger at being locked up. I still couldn’t wrap my head around how fucked up my life had gotten so quickly. Then again, I reminded myself, I had been depressed for as long as I could remember, the high and elation of happiness as far away as the nearest star. It was just as hot and foreign to me as that star, too. This unattainable, inexplicably appealing hot wash of anger rushed through me, boiling up alongside the fear. These people were keeping me here against my will. Who honestly cared if I killed myself? It didn’t matter, I didn’t affect anyone. Everyone would keep on living perfectly fine and normal lives, if not better
Michelle Obama is correct about us students feeling more tired than someone our age should feel. That most of us had to battle to get to where we are today and some had to more than others. Scars are just a reminded that the past is real. I have some scars some more visible than others. Sure some are a reminder of my clumsiness and not much of a story behind them, but some have a permanent scar not just on my body but in my mind.
All my life, my main goal was (and still is) to move out of Wisconsin, say goodbye to the negative fifty degree winters, and explore the world. Looking for a career that incorporates my love for traveling and my intrest of Business has always sounded like a dream.Going to new, exotic places has always been a significant part in my life. After all, my first trip was when I was eight months old to Turks and Caicos. Throughout time, our family traveled to most of the Caribbean, I was infatuated with everything about these countries. At the age of ten, I started taking online Spanish courses.In the past year, I started to learn my third language, Italian. Learning a language takes a strong memory, from memorizing the spelling to all the forms the word has to be in.
Although, I enjoyed steady employment my desire to finish school lingered with me. I needed a guided path of straight forward thinking with no distraction also with no life worries of daily living and survival.
The problem is that the relief that comes from self-harming doesn’t last very long. It’s like slapping on a Band-Aid when what you really need are stitches. It may temporarily stop the bleeding, but it doesn’t fix the underlying injury. It also creates its own
Being raised by a grandmother with Stage 2 Alzheimer’s and Stage 3 Breast Cancer, a father with chronic asthma, and having a mother with Internal Shingles, there was a point in my life where I thought that I was going to lose everyone that I loved. Even though I did lose my grandmother, the best thing I saw was when she had passed away with a smile, because I knew everything was going to be okay and that she was happy with the life that she lived. But, one of the greatest obstacles that I had to face happened at a time where I question who I was and my purpose on this earth. In high school, I discovered a gift that I never thought I had, the ability to manipulate the English language in a manner of unraveling a mind rather that slapping a set
It was a frigid March evening in the mountains of Colorado when I began to see life in a new way. While on a youth ski trip hiding from an armed man outside the cabin, I came to a point in my life that changed my way of living. This experience brought me to the realization that I will not always be guaranteed tomorrow so live each day I have to the fullest. I never thought a trip to the mountains of Colorado would help me see life from a new perspective; however, I thought wrong.
The deeper the cut, the more blood you lose and one day your heart, soul, and body would just collapse. If you cut more often than intended, self harm would turn into a cycle of pain, and soon you would be sucked into a black hole of despair. I, myself think that it’ll cause trauma and ptsd, I still have nightmares of me self harming and the thought of death, self harming thoughts could possibly stick to you forever. Even though depression is what mostly caused self harm, there are many other reason and symptoms people have. Some people are masochistic, masochistic means basically, that people like to feel pain but sometimes they could enjoy self harming to the point of bleeding to
From the very beginning of the school year, all the teachers have been acknowledging all the things that will prepare us for high school, and I have been thinking nothing about it. I kept telling myself that high school is still so far away. All of a sudden, it has hit me that i’m graduating and moving on to high school. In my short time in District 57, I have learned a vast amount of things from complex equations in math, to managing homework.