Personal Narrative-R. I. P. Childhood

The most impactful event I experienced, was the loss of my father. I lost my father as a result of homicide, but he had made choices that kept him from being in my life. As a child, I saw my father every month and I enjoyed it: I had two sisters, I could hang out with and play with our dolls. My father could be a loving and great person when he chose to be.

Growing up I was extremely close to my father. He was always a tough guy to please, and I aspired to impress him and be the daughter he wanted me to be. Little did I know, my father would end up breaking my heart, and be responsible for tearing my family apart.

am beset {long pause} How long will I let the pain and loss define my life? An enduring struggle of loss and gain A monumental achievement through the tangles of deeds But is left alone with silent words

Hailey G. is a five-year-old girl. She is the second of three girls; her older sister is 13 and her younger sister is 3. She is half-Dominican and half Colombian. Her mother is from Colombia and her father is from the Dominican Republic. She has traveled to Colombia two times and went to the Dominican Republic for the first time in December 2016. When she learned she was going to D.R. she was very excited. She said that she had never been there and was so happy to go visit Abuelita. I reminded her that I used to live in D.R. before I moved here to the United States. When she came back from vacation, she brought my assistant, and I a souvenir. I really love the souvenir and it reminded me when I lived back home. Her paternal grandmother comes

Growing up as a kid, I was quite the troublemaker. I would act out inappropriately at unfitting times, which frequently led to consequences. It did not matter whether I was in public or at home; I would continue to act the same. It ranged from using offensive words and physically hurting others, to being inconsiderate. I was a naïve child who was oblivious to the real world, and acted on a whim without the thought of the consequences for my actions. One may describe this behavior as simply what makes a child, a child; however, I never knew how much it would affect my life going forward.

When i was little i was a sweet child. I never caused any trouble. I never bothered anybody, I even made straight A’s. But that all changed when we moved to a new neighborhood. When we moved it seemed like a good place at the time. There were kids my age, there was a playground. I thought it would be a great place to live. They first day we moved to our new neighborhood i didn't come outside. I didn't come out that second day or the third the fourth. I was to busy playing games to bother to go outside. It was the fifth day when my mom said “How do you expect to make friends if all you do is stay in there house”?. I said “Yeah, your right I guess ill go outside”. So I went outside roughly about 12 kids were outside playing on the playground so I jumped right inn and started playing to.

The girls were feeling better the next day after a good night’s sleep. Both were still red, but not as painful as last night.

Growing up as a kid, I noticed a reasonable difference in my life where my mind grew up faster than my physical body. Maybe it was the strict rules that matured me or the high expectations instilled in me that formed my personal character. Remembering those lonely walks on my way to elementary school through the heart of a developing Desoto neighborhood and those short friendships formed on the rusted playground detailed the beginnings of my childhood. The constant dreams of becoming a successful man in the footsteps of my father clouded my head as I laid in the bunk bed of my hopes that shadowed the doubts of my developing mind. Through the ticks of time, it truthfully told the struggle of confidence and purpose as I searched for a safe haven

Growing up, I never really liked children. From the crying over no reason to the whiny voices of deceitful little monsters, the feeling of overwhelmness and depression seemed to rush into me instantaneously whenever I was near one. I dreaded helping out in the nursery during Relief Society Enrichments and yearned to be free when I was stuck babysitting hyper little ones who did not seem to know what an indoor voice was and was all too familiar with screaming. The thought of having kids, let alone being near them was a nightmare. As I saw my peers coo and fuss over a first grader (who seemed to me, knew just the kind of power he had) for hours, I wandered how anyone could be so fascinated by a simple child. It was not until my Junior year that I received more than just that answer.

Have you ever lost a close one, friends, family? Once you experience a loss, everything changes. It’s a life changing experience, it’s the worst feeling in the world. When losing someone, you look back and have so many regrets. You start to think “Could I have been a better person for them?”. It’s permanent, once they are gone, they are gone.

Picture a woman sitting at the table with a baby in one hand, phone in the other, bills scattered around on the table, and a look of despair written all over her face. This was the image that I saw of my mother at the age of six, a struggling single parent taking care of three children. She walked around with a joyous look on her face for me and my siblings, but I knew that inside life’s reality was eating her away. Seeing my mother depressed because my father wasn’t in the picture was unbearable. Hearing her cry on the phone to my grandmother at night about how she can’t do it anymore was heartbreaking. Having to do everything alone greatly played a part on my mother’s emotions in a negative way.

At the age of twelve my life was going pretty fantastic. I had an awesome job, a loving family, and a great group of friends. After an extremely long shift at the dinky baseball park snack shack, I went to watch one of my best friends, Robbie, play in his baseball game. When I sat down to watch I began feeling extremely sick to my stomach, with such intense pain that made moving difficult. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, so I sat on the cold metal bleachers and finished watching the game. After the baseball game had finally ended my mom came to pick me up. When she saw me the first thing she said was, “Wow, Kort, are you okay?” I kind of lied to her and said, “Yeah, just a little sick to my stomach is all.” My mom and I continued our fifteen minute journey back home, and I knew that she could tell something was obviously wrong with me.

When I was ten years old my dad had passed away due to an infection in his system. It was a difficult obstacle to overcome as a child because growing up without a dad I did not have a father figure in my life. Growing up I had a lot of anger issues and depression because I had lost my father and it was very hard for my mother as well financially and emotionally. After we had buried my dad in Guatemala and I went back to school my situation was not as bad. I do not think I took any steps to overcome this because it was a death of a parent I do not think there is any step to overcome this rather than time. It has been seven years since my dad has passed away and every now and then it still hurts but it did got a lot better. You tend to meet people

Being a kid seemed so easy. So consumed in your own imagination that nothing else seemed to matter, too busy to realize the reality. An occasional tear if hurt or scared. It was nice when monsters in the dark crowded dreams, only to soon disappear when you woke up. But there comes a certain age when you are thrown into the den.

I reminisce of the days when my mother made my siblings and I say this verse out loud every morning, “The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him”. My life has been filled with adversity. I grew up in a small village in Africa, where I was surrounded by poverty. I still can hear the little children crying out of hunger, school children walking miles to school with no shoes, little children sniffing glue or following strangers begging for money or food. I can remember the agony in their eyes. Growing up, I was very timid, intimidated (especially by those who grew up in big cities), lacked self-confidence and conscious of what the society thought of me.