Personal Reflection

Decent Essays

Growing up I was taught to be nice to everyone. Even if they treated me wrong I was expected to “kill hate with kindness”. Now that I’m a young adult I’ve had a chance to reflect on this motto that I’ve grown up with and realized that this advice may have done more damage than good.
When I was young I was teased a lot, I had a big forehead, two huge gaps in my teeth, and a lisp. I also grew up in a predominately White and Hispanic small town which didn’t help me much either. When we had to read out loud in class I never volunteered because I knew someone was going to over exaggeratedly mock me and it was usually the people I called “friends”. I’d try to get them to stop but they’d make me feel like I was being mean since to them “it was …show more content…

They would seem ok at first and then all at once, almost like a switch, they started poking and prodding at my insecurities and taking advantage of my kindness. It destroyed me mentally and emotionally and eventually took a toll on me physically. I fell into depression and started isolating myself from the world. On the outside I seemed fine but on the inside I was crumbling. Not even my parents knew what was going on inside my head. Things had become so bad that at age 16 I attempted suicide.
It wasn’t until very recently that I had an epiphany and truly accepted that I didn’t need to be nice to people who didn’t deserve it. My friends had been telling me this for months but it hadn’t occurred to me how much better my life would be if I actually took their advice. I was fed up with being hurt and realized that I had all the control if only I took that first step. The day after I made this decision I went to school and had an encounter with one of the people who had been recently treating me wrong. As soon as I walked up to him and his friend he made jokes at my expense with his friend and in the same breath he asked if we were going to hang out after school. I thought about the night before and told him no very sternly and I assume he noticed the change in my demeanor because he then asked why I was being mean. I let him know that I didn’t appreciate the way he made fun of me even if he only meant is as a joke and in the end I just told him to

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