Small Talk Your Way Out of Awkward Silences: 8 Practical Ways to Do It
By Glori S. | Submitted On June 05, 2012
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Expert Author Glori S.
Small talk has had such a bad reputation among introverts. If you happen to read articles about debunking introvert myths, you 'd find yourself reading something along the lines of "introverts do not like small talk... "
The Small Talk
Well, it 's basically true. Most of us do not see the point in talking about the weather when it 's so obvious. Even one of my favorite authors, Susan Cain, says "It 's OK to cross the street to avoid making small talk."
As wonderful and as "permissive" that statement sounds, I feel that we should make the effort to practice the art of small talk, and how to turn it into a real conversation, every now and then.
Doing this, maybe we can even learn to begin using small talk to our advantage. This may help address one of the most common and unfortunate issues introverts face: difficulty in making new friends.
Contrary to popular belief, there are many of us who do want and like new friends (but that 's for another post).
Some try their very best to attend social gatherings to
In my 18 years of living I have never been considered very talkative or vocal. My father would always tell me that talking too much could land you in a big heap of trouble so I refused to do so. He had a phrase, “One thing guaranteed for a person that talks too much is swollen lips”. Hearing that as a child was kind of funny to me, but as I have gotten older I now realize what he was interpreting. I have seen a lot of people get into altercations for running their mouth’s too much and swollen lips is usually the ending result. Although I don’t talk much, I believe I can hold a pretty decent conversation with someone I have things in common with. I use to avoid talking to strangers, but being put in different settings with nothing but strangers has helped me with that to a certain extent. I still wouldn’t consider myself outgoing, but I will get out of my comfort zone if I see a female I find attractive or need to express the way I feel about something; however, talking irrelevantly is not my
Use the appropriate language and vocabulary for the person you are talking to and ask open questions.
In her article Shyness: Evolutionary Tactic? author Susan Cain addresses many of the preconceived notions society has against introverted people. Cain argues that society tends to favor the outgoing and extroverted and shames those who prefer to be alone rather than socialize. The author utilizes certain writing strategies as a way to change her audience’s original views surrounding introversion. Cain’s use of comparing and contrasting, specific examples, and strong transitions that bridge various ideas to each other make her argument, that introverts are essential to society, much more persuasive.
People might say that I am not that talkative. When I was in school I wasn’t the kind of girl who goes and talks to everyone, unless I knew the person. I always had to wait for someone to start a conversation with me. That’s why in some way it was hard for me to make friends as a child, because of my shyness.
“Why are you so quiet?” This question has plagued me throughout my life, people often mistake my introverted nature for a lack of good communication skills. I might not talk as often, but from an early age I learned that communication was so much more than simply speaking. Growing-up my parents had a make-shift store at the San Fernando Swap Meet selling kitchen supplies, it was there that I came across many different methods of communication. In order for the family business to strive, listening to the customer and interpreting their non-verbal cues was essential to selling our products. This experience made me realize that I was interested in communication and this interest propelled me to pursue journalism. In high school I was editor-in-chief
We’ve all engaged in some sort of small talk either in the office, on campus, at a party, or other places where you find yourself in the company of others. For some of us, participating in small talk may come easily, while for others it may be quite difficult. Some individuals may find small talk to be irritating while others find it a necessity. In this paper I am going to explore what exactly defines small talk as such; the reasons why people find the need to engage in small talk; the benefits, and disadvantages of small talk; is there an ethical approach to small talk; and provide tips on how to participate in small talk—without it creating an uncomfortable atmosphere.
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Growing up I was the little girl that would hide behind her mom’s leg when people tried talking to me. In other words, I was extremely shy and never liked talking to strangers. Breaking out of my shell as I grew older is an understatement. Today, I will have conversations with people I do not know, but I will not be the one to start them. Once I meet someone and start to get to know them, that’s when the real me comes out. Like most people, depending on the topic I can be silent, loud, gloomy, or livid. As a communicator, I believe that once I have talked to the person once or twice I am great at having conversations. Others might agree or disagree. When it comes to my best friends or family members they all would say I never stop talking,
As an introvert I like to share my time with few friends or even one person versus tens or hundreds of friends. I love having peaceful and quiet time to myself. I look forward to it being that I have to work with people daily. I believe that I am approachable and easily engaged by friends, co-workers and strangers. However, I don’t dominate the conversations. I am an active listener, giving complete attention to what others say. This is important in the workplace. As an office manager at a Condominium property, it is extremely important to have active listening skills since majority of interpersonal interactions revolve around resident complaints, requests, inquiries or suggestions. Sometimes, others take my reserved and introverted personality for weakness. Partially, I consider my introverted-ness to be a weakness because I have a tendency to isolate myself more than I desire to engage in socializing. Being that I don’t have a problem being vocal about my opinions, thoughts or knowledge it can be a deterring defense mechanism to ostracize others. This is counterproductive at times in the workplace. It only serves me when I am sensing that someone is trying to start
Being in activities that encompass many different personalities and many different groups of people has allowed me to come into contact with people who I would have never otherwise met. I have found that people who share activities with me also share my interests, which makes them much easier to talk to. Because of this, I have grown up in an environment that fosters the habit of talking to new people and trying to find common interests. This exposure has lead to the development of an outgoing personality, which I take great pride in.
Most aspects of a conversation which are second nature to most people, can be quite
Ever since I was little, my mom would tell me how outgoing I was around people. I would hear story after story of me as a little toddler carrying on conversations with people passing by in the grocery store. Talking, connecting, and communicating with others is something that has always been one of my greatest assets. I would have never
People often assume that I don’t have any friends or very few of them. I have enough close friends that I can talk with and have a great time. Most of us still play video games and some of us know a good
Interpersonal communication is a face-to-face interaction, something we all do in our daily lives. Even though everyone communicates, we all do it differently and at different degrees of experiences. Not everyone will be perfectionists at communicating and socializing, but there is always room for improvement to slowly build your way up and become more efficient and competent. If you are anything like myself, I think am subpar communicator but an active one. I tend to communicate and am more talkative in a smaller environment. For example, I am more comfortable conversing with one other individual or in a small group than i am with a big crowd or in big classes. I will talk more and be more interested in the conversation if it was with one
Lasly, small talk is painless and cost -free for the two strangers. The reason this is because they will not be providing too much simply by exchanging their names and the major that they are learning with one another. In fact, if they do not proceed on to more personal matters, they actually only exposed very little. For example, when you are at a party. You are standing by yourself in a corner of the room. When suddenly a person approaches you and ask you to a dance. To get comfortable with them they tell you their name and age. You then to decide to also tell them your name and age as well. Finally, you the both of you then go to dance.