Running Head: STAY AT HOME DADS
Stay at Home Dads
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Abstract
Traditionally families were defined by their faithfulness and conventional sex roles. The roles of men and women were structured according to the traditional family roles. It was believed that the father’s role was to work in the office the whole day as the mother stays at home to attend to house hold chores. For many years traditional marriage was the cornerstone of almost all societies, an important institution for the passing on of values and taking care of children. That was then, the present is experiencing changing roles, and fathers opt for staying at home as mothers pursue their careers.
Introduction
The stereotype that men
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What involves staying at Home?
The decision for one to become a stay-at-home dad may encompass a lot than what meets the eye. A father considering remaining at home may look at many factors including his earning power as compared to that of the spouse. Work attire, commuting costs, daycare costs and other working expenses. A slight repetitive flaw is rooted along with the idea of house husbands (McKay 4). Regardless of whether the decision of men to become primary care givers is by choice or by force, the fact is that these men take on the care giver role and perform it with a sense of commitment to the well being and health of their families. However, the sad thing is that as they go about their duties, they are met with quizzical looks and criticized for taking on the role of fathers who are responsible and take good care of their children and keep their families home running smoothly. This does not mean that all stay at home parents including mothers are ideal parents, it only suggests that men also can be effective as women in taking care of their families despite the way the society views what is normal and acceptable gender role performance. According to Frank, in his book, The Involved Father, he argues that fathers are just doing what mothers have been doing all along and that is domestic house work. The only difference is that in the present day,
Looking back at history, women’s role in the family has remained unchanged till last century. In the early times, women’s most significant profession was that of wifehood and motherhood and a “little more than a slave of her husband”(1). They were viewed as a creative
The family shows both continuity and changes which can be seen by looking at nuclear families and single parent families respectively. Before 1940s, marriage was considered an important part of society and thought to be a social institution essential for order. Divorce and single parent families were considered dreadful, sex outside marriage was not acceptable, it was a moral offense. The tempo of divorces was very low, but this social behavior soon ended in the post war era. By 1960s, this was no longer the case, as women started to work. They became much more independent, laws were changed and increase in divorces and cohabitation rates had shown that marriage was not compulsory in one’s life.
Throughout history, women have been groomed to be the best they can domestically. To place them in the man’s position of being the sole provider of the family seems irrational at best. Although the natural gender roles may be overpowering during the start of having a family, through time duties between husband and wife, regarding domestic life, tend to balance out once financial security is established. Like many major changes, it starts out bumpy but eventually a solution is found and both husband and wife find their “happy-medium.”
The differences between gender roles are not so apparent anymore. Men are not always the typical breadwinners and many women are not stay-at-home mothers. An article by Beaupré, Dryburgh, and Wendy (2010) described the transition that many men are going through. According to Beaupré, et al., (2010), fathers were once considered the forgotten parent. “Until recently studies on the family focused mainly on the mothers” (Beaupré, et al., 2010). Fortunately, both parents are now being focused on. Fathers today are much more involved in the pregnancy and birth of their child and their child’s life in general (Beaupré, et al., 2010). Beaupré, et al., (2010) explained that women’s involvement in the labour force could be a factor to this change. Women are more educated than they were in previous years. And while women want to work more, men want to be more involved in their children’s lives (Beaupré, et al., 2010). Fatherhood is occurring later in adulthood. Research stated that the majority of men are very satisfied with their involvement in their children’s lives. (Beaupré, et al., 2010).
Scholars have researched on how to integrate gender within the main organizing constructs of social life. One social realm where scholars have vastly research is family structure. The family institution has encountered much gender problem issue, starting with "who does the housework". During this period of time, where women are gaining more civil freedom in society, there has still been a struggler for equality within society and family spheres. I investigated how gender role is significant within the family institutional context, especially in the division of labor in household. The second shift, which is used by Hochschild, "borrowed from the industrial life" is an "idea that homemaking was a shift", it is a second shift because the first shift is labor force." Moreover, the idea of the "devotion to family scheme" is a culture model that defines marriage and motherhood as a women's primary vocation. Therefore with these two notions on the family roles, the main driving question of this research is how do urban employed married couples with children divide the housework.
Women feel more obligated to stay at home or work part time if they have children. Even if they share household chores with their spouses, many women still prefer to work less in order to sustain the home. However, women who are single mothers do not have the luxury to stay at home, and working part time may be the only option they have. For single mothers working is imperative in order to keep the family afloat financially, but with all of the commitments they have, they cannot balance everything. Childcare is essential, because while single mothers are working they need a reliable place to send their young children; the same with single fathers as well. Most women in the work force have children to take care of, and families to provide for, which many take as a decrease of masculinity, and the increase of femininity. On the contrary, many studies show that although the labor force is divided, the household is not and do a lot to maintain the household as well. According to Hertz and Marshall (2001), “Men who participate in more companionate activities with their children (such as play, leisure activities, and TV watching) are no more likely to take on other household chores than less-involved fathers. It is only men who participate in nurturing, are more nearly partners in family work. Men are also more likely to
Fathers today spend more time taking care of their children compared to previous generations. Even with these gains, today's mothers devote almost double the time that fathers do for child care.[2] While every situation is different, in most families there
In our society, we carry an ideological assumption that a “normal” family consists of the man working to provide for the family and the women takes on the role of stay-at-home mom (Dow 1992).
Women’s role within the household has changed considerably over a period of time. In the later days in the United States women were to attend to the children and to the house and not do much more than that. Children are now being raised by stay at home dads instead of the stereotypical stay at home moms. According to Gardner, "Real-life families have changed considerably since 'Mr. Mom ' appeared, with more men sharing child-rearing and household chores." (Gardner 2010) This is occurring because women’s jobs are no longer labeled as being just for women. Men have gotten a lot of criticism for being stay at
For various reasons, many children in the United States are living without their fathers in their homes or absent from their lives entirely. This is an issue all across the world and the children are having to deal with the disadvantages caused by the lack of support from their fathers. This issue has a significant effect on society and can be viewed and interpreted from the three sociological perspectives. As a result of many studies, it was found that children raised in father absent homes almost universally experience disadvantages such as: worse health, poorer academic achievement, and a less enjoyable educational experience. There are many variables that need to be taken into effect when considering
The survey found that it was still very rare for fathers to take primary responsibility for childcare in dual-earner families, no-earner families or families where only the woman worked, showing again inequality in conjugal roles. Therefore Ferri and Smiths findings disagree with the statement, showing inequality in conjugal roles. Many women agree with Ferri and Smith that it is they rather than their
Fathers are often under a lot of personal and cultural pressure to be “the man of the house.” Studies have gone in depth regarding how this affects a father's interaction with his children. Often, fathers spend their whole lives working to support their children and teaching them important new skills and abilities. Even more than a mother, they perceive their children as weak or
In addition, in the traditional families the mother usually bore the sole responsibility of the child caring. Modern parents now share this responsibility together because of social and work constraints. However, holidays which are not common in the traditional family, allow them to spend quality time with their children. Moreover in many modern families the father becomes a house worker, to provide for the needs of his children. As the statistics shown in the United Kingdom in 2001, 155 000 fathers were stay home husbands. All in all, the emphasis on nurturing children can be seen in traditional and modern families, alike.
It has been experienced from time immemorial that there has always lain a very big and noticeable gap in the roles that both women and men play in the everyday societal developments. The issue according to most of the renowned researches is more elusive to the women as they are the ones that are mostly faced by the double standards in the society and this could include very harsh challenges as far as economic and financial status is concerned. Some of the roles of women in the society and more typically, in the house-hold, were very much considered inferior as compared to that of the men who in addition, were given an upper hand
One of the main causes that marriages are not lasting is the change in the roles of woman today. Prior to the 1980’s it was the man’s responsibility to earn money and financially provide for his family, whereas the