When I Don 't Understand You

984 Words Aug 7th, 2015 4 Pages
There are times when I don’t understand you.
But sometimes I wonder if I ever understood you at all.
As you stand there on the pier, staring out into that damn green light, I find myself sitting here, chilled to the bone, my thin shoulders wrapped by a thick woollen blanket. I’m too tired to join you, but even if I wasn’t, would you even want me to? I ponder this often; do you even want my company? That green light, the golden girl you adore like no other, she’s your alone. Your vision, your dream, no one else’s. The one thing you couldn’t have.
My arrogant backstabbing cousin.
I never understood what it is you see in her; sure you have a past together. Guess I’ll never truly understand. You do so much just to find her, you go to unbelievable lengths to make her yours, and… well maybe one day it will happen. No… Maybe is too strong a word. A chance? Still a little too strong.
I still don’t know what to make of it, though maybe it’s better like this.
You turn your head standing on the cold spot of my back porch, our eyes meet. But all I receive is a faint smile before you return to your anxious waiting, your vigil. As your hair blows in the wind a moment of youth flashes across you, you look young. As the vision vanishes you return as the self-made cultured New York millionaire you’ve become. The king of bootlegger lane.
I force myself to rise; I’m going to do it. I can’t stand this obsession anymore dammit, this “unrequited love” or whatever the hell you call it. I’ve never…
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