A Speech On The Day I Lost

As soon as my eyes woke up to the bitter cold of the night and stars covered by black blanket of clouds, I knew that this was it. I had tried to prepare myself that day, but I was at school when it happened. The moment the intercom came over the classroom, “Hailey Wooldridge needs to come the office, her mom is here to check her out,” my heart stopped. I was able to make it to the office without losing my composure, but as soon as my eyes met my mom standing there with tears in hers I lost it. Right there standing in the school office, the food gates of heaven opened up in my eyes and I could not stop the rivers from flowing. My best friend since kindergarten had died. All the planning of moving in together when we went to college was down the drain. The late nights of watching horribly filmed scary movies was done. My heart was broken, and the pieces are still not taped together properly. Two days later was her funeral. Her mother had asked me to say a couple of words about her during the service, but the thought of standing next to her lifeless body talking about her and not to her made everything seem surreal. By the power of prayer and numerous amounts of tears, I stood up from my seat and walked lifelessly to the podium that viewed hundreds of people waiting to see what I had to say. I do not know how I got through that speech without hysterically crying, but somehow, I talked like I was having a conversation with Serra once again. In front of me, I

My wife starts to sob as my son just sits there lost in his own world, and as for me i'm blindly throwing things with tears pouring out of my eyes like waterfalls. The pain in my heart knowing I couldn't stop this, or be there for her was so overpowering that i couldn't breathe. My Aaliyah was no longer with us and we didn't even get to say goodbye. Why? She was so young and was just paying off for all her hard work. She didn't deserve to die, not now, a father should never bury his daughter it should be the other way around.

After several weeks of my Grandmother passing, I came to realize she wasn’t coming back. The feeling of shock had left and now I felt intense amount of emotional suffering. The continuous feeling of pain and unanswered questions lingered about in my mind. I began to wonder how it could have happened and what people could have done differently. At this time, my whole family was grieving over the loss as well.

My dad pulled me out of the chapel and told me it was okay to cry, that the only way to get through something was to accept what had happened, and that if that made me cry, it was okay. Everybody sees crying as a weakness but it is not. Crying is a coping method for me, and many other people that i know. After the ceremony, many people left and went home. As i collected myself, I watched the leaves fall off the trees and to the ground as we followed the hearse that carried my great grandmother inside of it. We got out of the car and walked to the burial, where everybody stood and said their last words about Nannie. I stood in between my dad and my grandma, she reached into her pocket and handed me the cross that i had given to my great grandmother. I set it down in her right hand, remembering her telling me how much she loved her cross and how she felt that it would always keep her safe.

Her death was so unexpected for me, even though looking back now it probably shouldn’t have been. In the early morning of October 10, 2008, my mom came in my room and woke me up with Cocoa Pebbles on a tray that we barely ever used. I hadn’t yet noticed her red-rimmed eyes and distant behavior as my attention was solely focused on the food in front of me. Suddenly she had blurted it out, as if she had thought of no other way to say it. “Sammie… passed away last night.” It took me a few seconds to comprehend the magnitude of what she was saying, but when I did I got that feeling like someone had my throat in a tight hold. To this day, whenever I think about Sammie I get that feeling again. Back then I had the naïve mentality that dying at a young age was a rare thing and that death only happened when you’re older, when you’ve lived a full life. I took that for granted.

She was my dad’s mom, and we used to call her Bebe Hajji as a sign of respect for a elders who has completed a pilgrimage to Mecca. Bebe Hajji passed away from gallbladder cancer, and it was a very surreal time in not only my life, but my family’s as well. I don’t actually remember that much about her before she was admitted to the hospital, only when she was. I remember what she looked like, I remember what her lap felt like when she’d hold me, but I do not remember her voice. When she was in the hospital I never quite grasped what was going on, I knew she was dying, but i dont think i ever knew what death was. After her funeral I was sad, but i kept waitin for the other shoe o drop. I didn't know how to grieve, I was nine, I went back to school and i didn't cry when i told other people what happened, and i didn't cry at her memorial. As i've gotten older, it's stuck with me more and more. When I was in middle school i felt exponential guilt, about my lack of tears when i was younger. I felt like I hadn't lover her enough and as a result been unable to grieve. As I’ve gotten older I’ve realized people deal with death differently, and to be fair, I was nine.

A Journey in Grief: A Mothers Experience Following the Death of her Daughter by Alice W. Terry describes how the loss of someone so dear to you is unimaginable. When I was thirteen I lost my grandmother. She had been sick for a long time; I remember going to visit her in the hospital many times before she passed. The death of my grandmother was my first and only personal experience with the loss of a family member. Although this reality makes it hard for me to relate to this article at a personal level, I am truly grateful for the health and well being of those closest to me. Only being thirteen at this time, I was old enough to comprehend what had happened but I had not been old enough to truly experience the sorrow of losing someone. When I lost my grandmother, all I remember doing is crying. Although I was expressing emotion and grieving her loss, I do not remember having a conversation about what happened. How was I feeling? What is going through my head? Looking back now, it is frustrating to accept the fact that no one truly knew how to comfort me.

I could hear muted sobs as friends and family members began lashing out in tears. Yet, I stood still as ever as memories with my best friend began flashing in my head. I was best friends with a girl who lived right next door to me since birth. We told secrets and laughed with one another since the day I can recall my earliest memory as a child. It was unfortunate to see it all come to an end now that she was gone. All I saw was her lifeless body slowly turning pale on a stretcher stationed on her living room floor. This was one of those moments that makes you question how quickly life can take an unexpected turn. I wasn't willing to accept that

September 27th 2009. I was on my dad’s weekend and my mom was in the hospital for a weeks. I would visit her every day and sometimes bring her flowers. But on september 27th I woke up and walked into my living room and my dad was sitting on the couch looking sad. I asked what was wrong and then a knock was heard on the door it was my step dad and half brother. My step dad had puffy eyes he was crying. He told me to sit down and my brother came out and sat next to me. My dad looked at us and he spoke up your mother had just passed this morning. I was shocked I was hurt I was scared.I didn’t know if i should cry or run away. I’ve learned that losing someone you love is tough.

When I got my family was around our wooden table. My dad on his soft voice said “ I don’t think your grandpa will go through one more night, you need to call him” he cried. I felt like I couldn’t do it, felt so week and a huge hole in my stomach, something I’ve never felt before, I grabbed the phone and when I was about to call, the phone ringed, I passed the phone to my dad, It was my aunt sobbing and barely able to speak, then she said “ he passed away, I’m sorry honey” I couldn’t believe it I didn’t even had the chance to say

My grandfather’s body was slumped over on one side of his wheelchair, and I screamed when seeing his face turning purple. A few moment later, my father ran into the house, and he immediately drove my grandfather to the hospital. The doctor told my family that my grandpa only had one week left to live. The next day, my father saw a text from my uncle saying that grandpa has passed away eight o’clock in the morning. My father felt regret since he did not have the chance to see him for the last time. I was overwhelmed and shocked by what my father told me. My legs were shaking, and my heart was pounding faster than the beating drum. It was at that moment my eyes started to become blurry because my tears slowly ran down my cheeks. My grandfather was the most inspiring man that I had ever made in my

The truth is, I didn’t want to go at all, and I knew it would be very painful. Sure enough, when the deceased young man’s mother’s eyes locked on mine and she grabbed my hand, it seemed like an eternity! It was like she was holding on to her son’s life; it was painful, awkward, and very hard. I’m glad that the kids talked me into going, it was healing for everyone.

The morning wind is as cold as ice, slicing passed my skin while I’m standing against it. It always like today of every year: cloudy, cold and sad. Like the sky is crying with me. I blend down to a tall, sleek, marble stone with the name “Amelia Bennett” written on it. That’s my mother’s name. She died when I was 7 year-old, it’s odd that I have the memories of her very clearly in my brain. Most children probably won’t. But I do, and I when I do, I missed her. I don’t even know what happened on that tragic day. I was blacked out and the next thing I remember is that she’s now laying deep underneath my feet. No one knows what happen, or no one wants to talk about it, not even my aunt. She’s the one that take me in after the accident. Why? Because

In spite of this painful occurrence happening to me at twenty-four years of age, emotions such as shock, anger, and guilt, came into play creating chaos. I rerun her death in my mind, yet unable to completely forget the sadness, similar to a synopsis. These feelings can be frightening and overwhelming; however I have learned how to cope and with the realization that life and death are phenomenal both intertwined. I speculate that

Every morning I still wake up thinking that she is there drinking her tea in her room , watching tv. Then suddenly the truth comes rushing up to me and I realize that it is just a dream hanging around me still, and a cold despair fall upon me. I feel empty inside. My mother’s death was a really sobering experience I’ve passed through. It was the most devastating loss in my life.