Women who delay ending an abusive relationship are faced with many of the same complex emotional issues and social obstacles that face any of us when we contemplate leaving a partner. We are attracted to partners for reasons beyond the physical, for the good aspects of the person and the happy or comforting moments spent with them. When things are not going well in the relationship, these positive qualities and experiences provide incentives for working out problems. Reinforcing the effects of these incentives is the fact that we are socialized to expect to maintain a serious, committed relationship through good times and bad.
The term ‘abusive relationship’ brings to mind a relationship of unequal power distribution. The perpetrator is usually imagined to be the husband in heterosexual relationships and we, generally, identify the wife as the victim of such cases of abuse.
The ultimate goal of this research is to reframe the understanding of why women, and men, will stay in an abusive relationship, which can then lead to more effective means of breaking the cycle and helping those who are victimized get out of such relationships quicker and more effectively. When it can be understood why a victim of domestic abuse stays, it is possible to better prevent them from returning to such behaviors after they seek assistance and therapy. The underlying cause of the desire to stay is the missing link between existing literature and the ability to better combat intimate partner
Domestic or Intimate Partner Violence is not just hitting, or fighting, or an occasional mean disagreement. It's an abuse of power, the stronger opposing its will on the weak. It’s a multi-layered illness that terrorize and control their victims emotionally, physical, and economically. I have been blessed to have been raised in a family that provided a home atmosphere that was loving, nurturing, and safe. Unfortunately, many families or relationships aren’t so lucky. During my military career, I have witness physical injuries; testified on behalf of the abused; investigated DV/IPV first hand as a Platoon Commander and Company Executive Officer in the United States Marine Corps. In some cases, the physical damage involved significant trauma
Woman stay in in abusive relationships for a variety of reason, some are strictly economic and some woman feel they can’t survive in the world on their own (Ford, 2001, pg. 39). We as women fear the shame from society, the courts, and even our own families.
A vulnerable adult is someone aged 18 or over who may receive community care services because of a disability, age or illness, or may be unable to take care of themselves or protect themselves against significant harm or exploitation. Older people are especially vulnerable, for example those with health issues who are unwell, confused and unable to stand up for themselves due to how frail they are. Because of their defencelessness and vulnerability elderly people are more at risk to abuse. Other vulnerable adults include people who are open to abuse because of learning difficulties, physical disabilities or mental illness. Those with learning difficulties may be taken
The abusive partners use economic means to control the women to stay in the relationship. The women do not have any access to cash or a checking account. Men use tactics that negatively affect the women's ability to establish or maintain economic freedom. The tactics that men use include harassing women about money matters, destroying the women's credit, stopping women from working, and forcing the women to have sex for money (Swanberg & Macke, 2006). The risk is high for women who lack financial stability, who will end up being trapped in an abusive relationship (Kaukinen, Meyers, & Akers, 2013). The obstacles that women face because of economic dependence are serious for many victims of domestic violence (Sanders & Schnabel, 2006).
Though some women are able to escape abusive relationships their lives may be prone to certain conditions due to their struggles with depression, generalized anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress (Tolman & Rosen, 2001). These conditions include living
I would first like to start off by saying that this has been a very difficult topic for me. That is why I have waited until the last minute to post this week. It has only been a year since I have left my fourteen year abusive marriage. I hide the abuse from all of my friends and family. When you are in the situation you do not realize how bad it is until you are almost dead or in jail. An abusive relationship is like a leaking faucet that starts with a slow drip and over time the slow drip has become a flooded house because the pipe has finally broke. First comes the fight, then comes the violent episode, then the honeymoon phase after the violent episode. The make-up sex was so intense. He would love to hit me then make me have sex with him. He would say it is such a turn on. He would always say I cannot believe I did that. I am so sorry it will never happen again. Sometimes months would go buy even years but it would always start back up. I will say that the emotional abuse I suffered was far worse than the physical abuse. I would rather my ex hit me than tell me that I was a pathetic, dumb bitch that didn’t deserve to be alive. I am in therapy and supports groups right now and they are helping me get a better understanding of why I stayed and how to never be in a situation like that again. I am a work in progress and I am happy to say I am alive and I am finding my happy again.
This literature focuses on the quality of life of women that had the courage to leave physically abusive relationships. The women of this study sought refuge after leaving physically abusive relationships. In order to collect data, the researchers randomly selected 212 female participants to be interviewed. Many of the women revealed in the interview that they experienced health issues such as headaches and chronic stomach pains. In addition to physical ailments, the article revealed that many of the women encountered instances of high anxiety and depression. The women admitted that the mental and physical illnesses that they were experiencing contributed to their low quality of life. The article concludes that women that seek assistance
Abused Men believed to suffer from mental health problems as a result of the violence, depression, and distress. In 2004 according to the National Crime Victimization Survey 1.3 per 1,000 men had been assaulted by an intimate partner. The National Violence Against Women Survey found that men were physically assaulted by their current or former spouse at a rate of 0.8 %.
Abusive Relationships is defined as the “systematic pattern of behaviors in a relationship that are used to gain and/or maintain power and control over another” (Huston, 2010). The forms of abuse range from emotional to financial and each has an everlasting effect on the victim. An abusive relationship also has a discrete effect on the mind of the victim; they experience many psychology difficulties pre and post the abuse. Yet despite all these catastrophic consequences to both the mind and body caused by the constant abuse, many of the victims tend to stay in the relationships. The victim’s deal with emotional challenges on a daily basis, they are wounded on both a mental and psychical level, and have to deal with the constant pressure
Everyone has a fear of something in their life. Fear causes a person to be afraid and difficult to overcome that fear. One most conclusive factor women go back to the abuser because they are afraid and fear what will happen if they leave. In other words, due to the abuser having so much control over the relationship it tends to cause threats, violence, or even kill women if they even think about leaving. An abuser might threaten to cause hideous rumors to their partner reputation. Women need to have a safe feeling in their life and for the safety of themselves and family an abuser purposely make their partner fear that it’s their only choice to stay in the abusive relationship. The most violence injuries usually happen when women actually left
Abuse inflicted by an intimate partner is the source of a great deal of psychological distress for many women. Yet, some manage to survive and emerge from abusive relationships with fewer negative outcomes than others. This points to the need for investigations addressing coping strategies utilized by battered women that preserve their psychological functioning and their physical well-being during and after battering relationships.
People who are in abusive relationships intermittently suppress that it is hurting them. Three years ago, I was one of those people. For a prolonged time I had no notion that I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with someone, and that it was wrecking my mental health. The relationship deteriorated me and I was absolutely a changed person at the end of it. I was disgusted with myself, and nothing made myself cheerful anymore. It took myself a while to distinguish the distortion of my mood and behavior, and once I did, it was formidable to cut them loose. I was fourteen, plus I persuaded myself that I loved them. Admitting, I could clearly see that they were toxic for me, it did not alarm myself. I only wanted to be with them, even if it destroyed me mentally.
Thank you so much for all that you have done for me. You have gone through so much abuse all the time that my family and I lived with you. You were annoyed by my sister and I or hurt by accidents so many times that it is impossible to count. I remember the numerous times my sister drew on your stairs and all of the food and drinks we spilled on your carpet.You also never complained with all of the times you were hurt with water leaks, trees falling on you, and termites. You just roll with the punches and accept everything that happens to you. You will never know how much my family appreciates how you almost never speak up about your problems unless you really need it, like when your plumbing is hurting.