My First Relationship At The Age Of Fourteen Essay

Hello, my name is Dee and I am a survivor of domestic abuse. A good friend asked me if I would write a piece about domestic abuse. He said it would be therapeutic for me and beneficial for other women who have been abused or are being abused, and I think he is right. So here I sit wondering where to begin, after about an hour of emotional flashbacks. And when I do think about this I wonder how on earth could I have let it go on, and for as long as it did. And more-so, what did I ever do to deserve it. I was never abused as a child. Never beaten or abused emotionally or mentally, never called names, or cursed at, and I suppose I grew up thinking this was how it was for everyone. I was only 19 when I met my abuser. I already had a son, and had been out on my own for 2 years. Life was hard, bringing up a baby, surviving on living assistance, living in ghetto like neighborhoods. I had always aspired to be a journalist, but my dreams were broken when I became pregnant right out of high school and was forced out of the house to care for my son. I met my abuser one day when I was down town shopping with my son. He came into my life like a "wolf in sheep 's clothing", and was just about as nice as he could be. I suppose I was somewhat lonely since I never got to go out very often. He soon moved in with me and helped me with my son, helped in the house, and helped financially so things were definitely looking up. Or so I thought. He was from an abusive home himself, and years

Domestic violence can happen everywhere and to anyone. Race, gender, or age is not excluded from dangerous relationships that some never escape. But, for the ones who successfully flee from an abuser, they have to try and push back the trauma and horrifying memories the victims have faced in order to create a new life for themselves. Accomplishing this feat sounds impossible at first glance with proper help, victims of abuse can learn how to make their voice heard with the support of positive influences and a push to succeed. They learn to live with their past in a journey of acceptance but not forgiveness.

Abuse is a very common act within our society today, and there are many different types of abuse that a person can come encounter with. As a culture we send powerful messages makes it seem as though women are obligated to fill roles in their relationships that will keep them dependent on their partners for as long as they are together. Domestic abuse is popular within families and parents are putting their lives, as well as their children’s lives in a great amount of danger because they cannot seem to shake their bad habits or they have the desire to fulfill the needs of their partner. The “Home to Perfect” by Erica Naone is a fictional short story about a mother that puts up with abuse from the father of her children, and she is so bonded to the man that eventually, she is content with her way of living (http://everydayfiction.com). The mother in the story is so used to being abused that she endangers herself, and her children for the sake of a man she is in love with! There are many reasons why women deal with this type of abuse.

In the United States, domestic violence is the leading cause of injury in women between the ages of 15 and 44 (Nies & McEwen, 2015, p. 329). I have always struggled with understanding why women stay in abusive relationships. Growing up witnessing my own mother be a victim of domestic violence has made me less than empathetic for women who are in those situations and don’t do something to help themselves or their children. For as long as I can remember, I have said that if a person is in an abusive relationship and doesn’t take steps to get out of it, I have no sympathy for them. My goals for this experience were to identify at least two reasons why women stay in an abusive relationship and to identify at least two resources

Every choice that an abused woman considers to do with regards in seeking help or ending the relationship involves a variety of risks. Time and time again, the common question arises, “why doesn’t she just leave?” Most often abused women, at great and potentially fatal risk, do leave their abusive relationships. However, there is a multitude of barriers, including increasing abuse and the potential for re-victimization by the system that does not respond accordingly, and most often force many women to return to their abusers. A woman may become vulnerable as she goes through the stages of leaving her abuser. There are many reasons why a woman becomes vulnerable; guilt, denial, and fear may be among a few reasons, though no matter what the

My book addresses the subject matter of mental, emotional, verbal, financial, spiritual, physical, sexual abuse, rebuilding one's life after escaping abuse, healing, and moving forward. I share in-depth factual based information to expose the signs, characteristics, and effects of abuse for both the victim and the perpetrator. Resources are shared with the reader to remove themselves and families from dangerous environments.

The CDC reports that nearly half of all men and women in the United States have been psychologically abused by a romantic partner, while around a quarter of women and 1 in 7 men have been physically abused [2]. This is a dramatic difference from areas like the United Kingdom, where 8.2% of women and 4% of men have been abused [3] One in three people experience abuse by a romantic partner by the age of eighteen [4]. In 2015, 87% of hospitalized abuse victims in New York state were women, and were admitted more often than male victims [5]. This can likely be partially attributed to traditional gender roles, which assume that men are “stronger” than women and are “weak” if they are hurt by a woman.

Domestic abuse is often a subject that few want to talk about. Many look at it like it is a personal issue, an issue that is private to others to deal with. But with all the alarming statistics and effects, it should

For as long as I remember I my father’s parents treated my mother like trash. They always felt that my father married beneath his social class. So because we moved so close to them the disrespect they dished out to mother became a daily ritual. I now realize that the stress of this problem led to my parents yelling, fighting and violent behaviors that ruled our house. I was only five so this is the first house that I really remember from my childhood. The strongest memories I have from that time is the way my sister would grab me and run with me to the next door neighbor’s house when my parents would start their yelling and hurting each other. The neighbor man was a police office in our town and he would take us into his house, clam us down and then go over to stop my parents from beating each other up. No one ever pressed charges; my dad never left the house. My mother would laugh it off it was like they were trapped in a vicious cycle that could not be broken. Later we would go home and pretend that everything was ok even though every dish in the house was laying shatter and broken on the floor. Society told us it was ok, because this kind of behavior was going on all around us and no one said it was wrong or bad it was just the way things were. When I married the first time I found myself in the same cycle of domestic violence that I had witnessed my whole childhood. But I did not leave or ask for help because I

Since the age of three, I have had scarring images of being abused by my divorced mother’s boyfriend. I vividly remember the cold winter night that changed my life forever. My mother, her boyfriend, and I had just got home from going to the store. We were gazing into the clear, star filled night, pondering the constellations. When I felt a violent shove from my mother’s boyfriend. The next thing I knew, my head smacked off the

Domestic violence is not a label that can be boxed and defined. No, it is emotions of pain, fear, shock, confusion, and most surprising, love. It is difficult for many to comprehend if not brought up within a violent home; the true, passionate emotions that fall as a burden upon the victims, who often stay quiet. What brings the traumatic pain to domestic violence is that a person who is supposed to cherish and love another, ends up creating fear and panic when even mentioned. Domestic violence, which is indeed a form of abuse, is an issue that needs to be handled with delicate, yet able coherence. Within the society of America, the fight against domestic violence needs to be accepted instead of ignored. In doing so, there are many questions

Every year in the United States, One in four women are victims of the domestic violence; however, this is only based on what has been reported to the department of justice (Stahly 2008). While men are also victims of domestic violence, women are more often the victims. Moreover, 90% of domestic violence is male initiated. In severe cases domestic violence ends with victims being murdered. More specifically, domestic violence resulted in 2,340 deaths in the United States in 2007, and 70% of those killed were females (CDC 2012). Many people think that victims have the option of leaving and many people blame victims for putting up with the abuse; what many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers, these reasons include, isolation, having children bounding them with the abuser and lack of financial support. "It 's never pretty when you leave an abusive and controlling relationship. The warden always protests when a prison gets shut down," says Dr. Steve Maraboli (qtd from web). Whether a victim stays or leaves their abuser, the outcomes of both situations are not always as easy as many people predict. In some situations, the outcomes of leaving may be very dangerous for both the victim and her children.

Abuse can have many different meanings, there is one in particular that takes control in many Americans relationship, “physical maltreatment” (Abuse). Sadly there is an increasing amount of young adults going through an abusive relationship or were in one. Many of the people that become abusers consider violence as a normal behavior because they have witnessed it on a daily basis. They than begin to mistreat everyone that comes in his or her way. An abuser is frequently interested in controlling their victims. An abuser’s behavior is usually manipulating, in order to make their victims

In the United States, every 9 seconds a woman is assaulted or beaten (“National Statistics”). Every 9 seconds. In California, 40% of women are victims of domestic violence(“California Domestic Violence Fact Sheet.”). And, in Stanislaus County, there are 8,000 calls reporting domestic violence every single year(“Domestic Violence Calls for Assistance.” ). I chose this topic because out of all of the types of violence against women, rape, being stalked, human trafficking, etc., it is the one that I know the least about, and that I am scared of the most. I've written essays, given speeches, and done research on the other types of violence, but, in all honesty, it never occurred to me to think about domestic violence. To be abused and hurt at that level by someone you love and have put trust in is quite possibly one of the most terrifying situations that I could imagine. Someone you love and trust having the capability to willingly harm you is unfathomable.

It was early in September, still warm out but autumn was just around the corner. Today was an exciting day, because tonight would be an exciting night. Tonight would finally be the night. I was ready… right?