"[i] In the bleak midwinter-[/i]" I shoot up from my bed in the middle of the dark in a cold sweat, my eyes adjust slowly as I rub them in the darkness. I glance beside me at a familiar silhouette, it's none other than Thomas and I note his arm carefully constructed around my waist. In the few years I've known him I've realized this nervous tick about him, like a child, he finds the need to cling onto something in order to sleep. There have been moments in the night where I've found him cradling me like a beloved toy in his arms possessively but in the morning he's always gone and he leaves no evidence of his actions. Quietly and carefully I escape from his hold and for a moment I watch his sleeping figure as I sit there. It's odd to …show more content…
[center][img]http://i890.photobucket.com/albums/ac103/Nevershoutnevergirl18/129137725f5cd1621683bc3a7ebbe794.jpg[/img][/center] When I think of Michael my thoughts always appear to go back to [b]limbo[/b]. The first few years of [i]limbo[/i] were a blur. Whenever I sit down and actually try to think back all I can ever seem to remember are little insignificant things. I can picture things such as sitting in the park for hours and just hearing nothing but muffled voices and sometimes even seeing sunlight over glossy faces. One thing I remember vividly is the inside of my mind reminding me over and over again that the news of [i]his[/i] death was a mistake and he'd come back home to me and everything would go back to being okay. These last few days I've been distraught, worried because there are times I feel as if I feel his memory is escaping my grasp. I've found myself crying for hours because I'll forget his laugh, his warmth, or even the sight of his face. There are nights I can't sleep because everything just seems like a bad dream, but I'll walk around my empty apartment and find his picture just sitting there. Memories of us constantly appear to play in my head with brief seconds of us as kids or the last time I ever said goodbye to him. There have been moments I had thought I had gotten better, but no one ever seems to tell you that it never lasts long. Days feel repeated and feel as if they all mold into one, sleep is blissful because for a brief
I started thinking on how my dad left and I wasn’t going to be able to do many things that included him. Part of me wondered why he left me and why he had never tried to talk to me. For a while I thought I was worthless, sad and hurt. My mom gave me allot of love but there was something empty inside of me that needed time to heal. I would always reverie about how my life would be if my dad didn’t leave.
it is life, Mama!” Mama: “Oh—so now its life. Money is life. Once upon a
Night passes on and our heavy eyes slowly close as we drift into a sound sleep. Sooner than I expect, I woke up to the soft sounds of footsteps around; carefully navigating across the mounds of pillows. I roll over and look at the bare ankle walking beside me, with the friendship anklet tied around it. Sarah is probably going to the bathroom, I
I don’t talk about what happened and no one’s cares enough to question me, they’re just happy he’s gone and I thought I would be too. That day haunts me, I blame myself for not watching him I knew something was going to go wrong eventually, it always did when Lennie was around. I can still hear the ringing in my ears if it’s quiet enough; I will never be able to escape that moment in my life. I don’t regret what I did because it had to be done to protect him but it was still the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I feel like a part of my day is missing, a part I never thought I would ever miss but I do. I miss having to repeat everything I said to Lennie because at least then I had someone to talk to. I miss having that companionship even if he never understood or remembered a word I said at least he was there. When Lennie was here I had a purpose and that purpose was to take care of Lennie, now he’s not here and it feels like I have no direction
Glancing to the clock, I made note that it was barely past three o’clock and yet here I was planted in bed. I hated being ill, especially living alone. Although I have much support from my sister and her husband, I still spent most of the morning alone. I was not surprised by my illness, I had been grieving more and more as the days came. My entire state of mind had begun to strip away what little patience and avoidance I had. I had stopped eating for several days, my
All I do is lay on the couch, with a picture of my grandma, shredding gallons of tears while I attempt to watch a show on tv, but it is just too blurry for me to know what I am watching. Everything happening just doesn’t feel real. It seems as if I am living in the heartbreaking movies that my mom loves so much. Sleep does not come easy, it seems like the room has gotten more humid from all my tears. I toss and turn in my bed, not able to find that perfect position. Once I am able to fall asleep, the sun washes my room in light. Waking up after my quick nap, I have seconds of feeling normal before I remember the prior day's events, then my heart sinks deeper and I come close to sprinkling my pillow with even more tears. Luckily, I seem to have completely dried out of tears. For the rest of the week, I continue to mope around trying to distract myself by watching tv, and trying to play games with my sister, but nothing
I batted my eyelashes lined with sleep. For a moment, I was disoriented to where I was. I felt around the soft bed, waving around my arms frantically. The area next to we was cold; Ross was gone. I pushed my senses to get up, tempting myself with visions
I remember sitting at his kitchen table feeling alone and depressed. As he and his mother flipped through freshly glued college recommendation letters. I could feel a wave of emotion hit my mind. It seemed like the letters were endless, people must have loved him to death. I was loved on the field but that was not enough. A lump of anxiety formed in my throat as I began to follow my emotions into the pit of fear that lined my stomach. Submerging in my thoughts I was disturbed by a light vibration coming
Around midnight, I exit the room, quietly shutting the door. I’m surprised to find Jensen sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall, asleep. I smile weakly, but it instantly drops. There’s too much sorrow tight in my chest for me to smile. I sit down close beside him and he stirs, looking up at me, worried.
sometimes, if I see an especially sensitive-looking fighter, I’ll bet against him ‘cus I can’t stand the idea of missing the chance to spot a crier before he’s cried. I don’t know how much sense that makes, by when I explained my reasoning to Ed, he said that it was ten-times better to bet with your heart and lose, than to bet with your mind and win. Even though Ed pretends to be this grumpy, grisly guy, sometimes he can be cheesy like that.
“I fell,” Madge answers through gritted teeth, clutching her calf tightly as she blinks out tears from her eyes as quickly as she can. It was just her luck that she’d fall off the wall like a complete idiot right after being told to quit. Maybe the odds really weren’t in her favor.
“Morning private” Ben replied. It was like any other morning in the camp. Ben was a soldier in the american army. He was stationed in the rockies, fighting indians and exploring the mountain ranges. The camp was quiet, not a lot of words exchanged. The men all just sat around eating the same food and drinking the coffee as every other day.
With his other hand, he replaced your night dress. You stirred and he pulled back his hand, but you didn't wake up. However, the bundle began to squirm in his arms. He looked down, adjusting his arms to try to be more comfortable. The eyes opened and met their father's.
It’s been 4 months without grandfather. My life feels empty with no purpose. I never went back to retrieve the box. I didn’t want to be reminded of the pain. My mother reminds me everyday to at least go look and see what I find, But I see no purpose in that. I love my grandfather and it would be to hard to go back to the place I loved to be so much. His house has his distinct smell his manly smell. I used to wear his sweatshirts all of the time to make myself comfortable and loved. I can’t believe he’s actually gone.
To this day i tell my friends, i knew immediately after making eye contact with this unknown man, i was meant to spend the rest of my life with him. Surprisingly ,he felt the same way about me. We went to have a torrential romance of over four years. I was still struggling, trying to figured out my identity, this made me an unstable partner. The relationship ended when He called me to tell me he has gotten married, and he was going to be a father. While i was listening to his voice telling me the news, my heart stopped for a minute and memories of us, wandering around the black hills of south dakota flashed in front of me, followed by the image of us counting the stars while we told each other our deepest secrets. I also saw my dreams and hopes grumbling in slow motion as he spoke. I am not sure what happened next. I remember waking up the next morning thinking I could never find love again. As the months went by the pain was less palpable, my mind became clear, so did the memories. I remember when we went skiing; and he needed to cry out my name but he didn’t. I remember every time we said goodbye at the airport, he never said my name. I was not able to recall a single time when he called out my