The Arduous Journey Of Discovering Antonio 's Destiny

In the passages Confetti Girl by Diana López and Tortilla Sun by Jennifer Cervantes, the narrators and the parents have different opinion on what is the right thing to do, and because of their different opinions, tension and distance in their relationship is created. The narrators in both passages feel alone or left out either because of the lack of attention of because they are missing a beloved parent. In both passages the narrators feel uncomfortable with the parent and is not fully opening up to them. In the sections Confetti Girl and Tortilla Sun, the different opinions between the two narrators and parents create distance and tension in their relationship.

Furthermore, his dreams influence his belief of religion. In one of his dreams it shows God as unforgiving and punishing. God tells Antonio that “vengeance is mine” (173). Towards the end of the dream, the Golden Carp appears as “ such beautiful brilliance that he became a new sun in the heavens” (176). The Golden Carp seems much more positive than the Catholic God because of how the different God was described as in his dream. Antonio believes more of the Golden Carp rather than God because God punished people while the Golden Carp “swallows everything good and evil…and…becomes…a new sun to shine its good light upon the earth” (176). In the first dream, it mentions of another power, describing it as the presence of the river. Antonio asks to save his brothers but “…sparks flew when [he] spoke. It is the presence of the river” (26). This foretells that there is another great

This sets up the initial conflict for Antonio, he wants to believe in his mother's God, but at the same time he finds conviction and truth in what Samuel is telling him about the golden carp god. Furthermore, while Antonio is supposed to be praying to God he says, "There wasn't time to discover Him, like I could do when I sat on the creek bank and watched the golden carp swim in the sun-filtered waters" (233). I think this shows that Antonio feels a deeper connection to nature and the golden carp than he does to God and traditional values. He is more like Ultima, than like either one of his parents. The golden carp offer Antonio a way of thinking that is free and unstructured, unlike that of Catholicism.

The last idea to keep in mind is the roles the females are given in the book.

Antonio’s introduction to the golden carp presents a problem for him because of the Catholic view of pagan gods, yet Antonio feels a strong connection to it. When he first witnesses the golden carp he is overcome by “a sudden illumination of beauty and understanding” he had “expected God to do at [his] first holy communion” (Anaya 114). When Antonio’s questions to God are not answered during his first communion, he believes God has abandoned him. However, with continued pressure from his mother to become a priest and from Cico to choose between Catholicism and the golden carp, he struggles to decide what he believes. As Antonio’s doubt deepens, he questions God’s definition of good and evil and His plan concerning who receives forgiveness and who receives condemnation. In a dream, God speaks to Antonio saying, “You would have a God that forgives all, but when it comes to your personal whims you seek punishment for your vengeance” (173). For example, Antonio believes Florence should be forgiven, regardless of his disbelief in God, but Tenorio should receive punishment. When the Church cannot answer his questions, Antonio turns to the Golden Carp, and even considers that the Virgin should be a god. Antonio is lost in his faith identity,

Tony being brought up to the idea that God is everything and that he was supposed to be a priest, who was the one closest to God was all being questioned since Ultima’s spirit being present in Lupito’s death rather than God himself.

As time passes within the novel, Antonio continues to dwell on the growing anguish that his parents have unknowingly placed on him. He is lost within a void of confusion and uncertainty, melding together to create a source for which his terrors feast on. After learning of the Golden Carp from Cico,Antonio later dreams of the Golden Carp which sets the backdrop for what occurs within the dream. His mother and father argue over where he was baptized and continue to press that one is right and the other is wrong. “Mother… you are saved! We are all saved! Yes, my

In addition, Tony’s mother Maria was a staunch catholic who desperately wanted her youngest son to become a priest to a small community of farmers. Her roots were in farming and living off the land (having a mutually benefiting relationship-being connected to the land). She prayed during times of family toil constantly. Tony has a dream after his brothers beckon him into a whorehouse to sleep with the women at “Rosie’s House.” He refuses the offer and affirms that he will preserve his innocence in order to become a priest in the holy catholic faith. His brothers mock him. They try to tell him that in being a man and the son of a vaquero his need for bodily pleasure will become stronger. Here is where I believe Tony accepts the destiny that his mother supplies for him as a man of god, but again his faith in this religion fails. He feels that his catechism will protect him from being corrupted and that god will reveal himself during this ceremonial rite-but nothing happens. He thought that when he partakes in this ceremony all will be revealed to him, but it is not.

Parental pressure and religious ambivalence play a big role in Antonios life. In this dream we can easily see both of these themes. The divided world of his mother and father, and Catholicism and the religion of the Golden

To start off, Antonio is always under pressure from certain people that want him to do specific things in hopes of him securing the future of his people. This ties into conflicting cultures, which plays an important role when it comes to Antonio’s early life since his actions are defined by the conflicts between the Luna and the Marez. The Luna are the devoted farmers who worship the earth and the moon, while the Marez are very free-spirited vaqueros who are extremely devoted to their lifestyle and horses. Being a Marez is what causes Antonio’s three older brothers to go into the world and leave there family behind. “It was true, I thought, it is the Marez blood in us that touches us with this urge to wonder. Like the restless, seeking sea” (40). His brothers chose a path that Antonio is struggling to pick and cannot seem to identify with. This is a big deal because Antonio is only in the first grade and he is being pressured into growing up faster than he should be.

          Florence- Florence is one of Atonio’s friends. Although he does not believe in God, he attends catechism lessons with his friends. Florence’s mother died when he was three. Afterwards, his father slowly killed himself with alcohol. His sisters are now prostitutes at Rosie’s house. He asks Antonio insightful questions that point out the gaps in the Catholic Religion. When Antonio becomes

Florence wasn’t all that religious but he went to church anyways just to hang with his friends. Animal, I thought. Were the fish of the golden carp happier than we were? Was the golden carp a better God? (Pg. 197). This was Tony and Antonio talking about god and how he wasn’t reliable that it wasn’t bad to have knowledge outside of religion. Florence is just a small kid and he believes that isn’t looking over him. He does not believe in God because he lost his parents at an early age so he thinks that God is to blame for all of his misfortunes. Florence was found at the river where the carp swam floating motionless he had drowned. My attention was centered on the northern blue skies. There two hawks circled as they rode the warm air currents of the afternoon. They glided earthward in the wide, concentric circles. (Pg. 241). These hawks could symbolize the freedom, that maybe Florence was finally free from his torment that he has while he was alive. Florence was also a child when he died so he was pure of heart he did not commit mortal

Antonio learns about the golden carp from Cico, a friend of his. According to Cico, the golden carp was once a god who loved the people of Antonio's town, Guadalupe. The people were not allowed to fish for the brown carp that lived in the river that flowed around the town. These fish were sacred to the gods. However, because of a drought and no food, the people had to eat the carp to survive. This angered the gods. They wanted to punish all the people by death but "they relented from killing the people. Instead, they turned the people into carp and made them live forever in the waters of the river-". The god who loved the people wished to become a carp like them to protect them from the dangers of the river. The gods agreed and "because he was a god they made him very big and colored him the color gold". Antonio cannot believe there is a new god and seeks answers from Ultima. Ultima is pleased that he has learned so much, but says she cannot tell him what to believe for he must decide for himself. The Golden Carp represents all the questions Tony has about religion and morality. Tony’s confusion is due to conflicting forces in both these aspects of life. When Cico first introduces the Carp to Tony, he is forced to make a tough decision, “Do you believe the Golden Carp is a god?” which he skillfully evades until he has the information he wants to make his decision. After the emergence of the Carp, Tony begins to question his

As Antonio deepens his understanding of the river and the forces of nature that surround it, he begins to understand the human journey and his destiny.

Why chose a eulogy for a fictional character like Antonio? Antonio was seen differently by his friends, Shylock and the readers. To some, he was a man who was caring, kind, and would do anything to help his friends. To Shylock, Antonio is a man he despised, because he is treated unpleasant, all because he is a Jew. In the readers eyes, he is viewed as a villain in the beginning of the story and later as the victim of Shylock's revenge for the way Antonio had treated him. Most often, someone's positive attributes are remembered after their death, so this particular eulogy would be written more in the sense of a friend who is caring, loving, and would do anything for his friends.