To become successful, we have to learn for ourselves. By we I mean college students and students that about to enter college. College is a new environment in which we are given a form of self responsibility that we have never experienced before. Many parents realize this, but not every parent wants to give their child the freedom that comes along with college. Parents may think they are doing a great job by watching their kids every move, solving their problems for them, and making sure their grades are where they need to be, but their not. “Helicopter parents” are correlated with their kids having poor mental health which is leading to depression, fear of failure, and failure to cope with the new situations they are encountering every day. Parent’s need to learn to let go of their kids and let them face the new amenities of college on their own. Sending your kids off to college is a moment parents long for, but it is also a moment parents dread because they know that it is a start to a lot of freedom and decision making. Some parents drop their kids off at college and don't know how to let go. An example of this would be when a student told Dean Bill Deresiewicz when “she forgot to call her father to report on how that went, and when she returned to her dorm later that evening her uncle was in the dorm lobby looking visibly uncomfortable about having to “force” her to call her dad to update him. Later this student told me, ‘I pretty much had a panic attack from the lack
A child's main focus in life has always been being successful in school in order to achieve many riches in adulthood. Many people have supported these children to reach this goal by preparing them for about two decades. In return, their family members expect them that these clueless kids return the favor by going to college. Some have put their immense effort beyond their reach, but unfortunately there is a vast majority of students that do not have what it takes both academically and emotionally to earn a college degree or to even meet their own personal standards. Although they received all the help they could get, their parents forget to even consider that what matters the most for these young adults to go to college is their own willingness
Michelle Willins stated “Transferring all power to the students is not fair to them; they never asked for that responsibility.” Which I completely agree with her because the transitioning of high school to college is difficult. Many cannot adapt quickly to the change of environments and still need guidance from their guardians. For example in high school students are used to adults reminding them of what needs to be done and have adults always on their feet making sure they have the grades that they need to move on. In college that does not happen. The student is now responsible for everything on their own. Which is why they still need their guardians to be involved that way they are not as lost as they would be if they were on their
Does excessively micromanaging kids by overprotective parents affect their life post-college? Julie Lythcott-Haims addresses this concern supplementary to many others written in her book, How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kids for Success. The key theme is outlined perfectly, as Lythcott shows a great deal of concern for these children’s parents, as they do essentially everything for their child(ren). “Meanwhile, each year I saw more and more parents come to campus with their freshman kid and then . . . stay, literally or virtually, to: ask questions; select courses, activities, majors, internships, and careers; solve problems; handle conflicts; defend and advocate for their student; register for classes;
Karla Carney-Hall writes a scholarly article to explain current trends in family involvement. Carney-Hall uses a collection of previous research results to acknowledge that “The college admission and financial aid process encourages (and sometimes requires) parent participation” (4). If parental involvement was not going to be beneficial for the students, hopefully colleges would not require them to be involved as much as they do. Another thing that Carney-Hall brings to the reader's attention is that many college students unexpectedly identify their parents as being the most influential people in their lives (5), which could ideally help them to have a support system as they go from high school to college. Elements of Terri LeMoyne and Tom Buchanan’s study contradict the viewpoint that helicopter parenting can be beneficial for the student’s transition into college. LeMoyne and Buchanan bring up the rather recent concept that “...college and university officials... have become so concerned about the supposed negative consequences of ‘hovering’ that they have funneled both money and staff into programs to handle these parents” (400). Taking their knowledge into consideration, it can be concluded that colleges
However, most of the time, overprotective parents can help children during college. Surveys have shown that most first-year college students were happy that their parents were involved with their first year of college. Gregory Roberts, the executive director of the American College Personnel Association says that, “It has given colleges an opportunity to engage parents”. On the other hand, the downside of overprotective parents intervening with their child’s college life is that they are preventing them from growing.
After high school, many students make the decision on attending college based off of the things their parents/ teachers may have taught them when they were young. For example, many students further their education because throughout their lifetime they’re told they have to. In school we’re taught that in order for us to receive good jobs, and make a decent amount of money we have to have a college degree. Some are even taught that they must go beyond the undergrad and receive their masters, and doctorate degrees if they really want to be known as something in this world. While others go because it would make their parents proud, or to fulfill the legacy of being a first generation college student in their families. While this may be the case majority of the time, if you’re like me you go because
“Kids who are the first in their families to brave the world of higher education come on campus with little academic know-how and are much more likely than their peers to drop out before graduation” (1). Many people believe that school isn’t for everyone, and whoever goes is privileged for doing so. Countless people in the world today do not attend college, and this is mainly due to an influence of those in their family. Perhaps they are unsupportive of higher education, their parents and family members may view their entry into college as a break in the family system rather than a continuation of their schooling and higher learning. Most of the first-generation students decide to apply to colleges, because they aspire to jobs which require degrees. However, unlike some students whose parents have earned a degree, they often seek out college to bring honor to their families, and to ensure they make a decent amount of money for their future.
When parents first start realizing that their firstborn son is about to go to college, the feeling brings at least two concerns to their mind. First, they are saddened that their little boy is all grown up and about to head off into the world on his own. Second, the parents realize that they are about to get a huge hole in their bank account due to the fees that colleges require. The cost of college is so high that is forces the student to work at least one part-time job while attending college and causes families to worry constantly about the child in college.
Students from all over the United States are told all through their life that they need to attend college if they ever want to be successful, however, this is far from the truth. Often schools are culprits for driving students to attend money driven colleges, in other cases it is family. While schools all too often make the push on students to continue their schooling, parents can cause the same situation, as they may not have a degree and be working a low-paying factory job. Now kids already don’t want to be like their parents when they get older, so seeing them suffer in poverty or barely above the poverty line can cause some dissatisfaction, further seeking a degree to live a life that they never got. What many
In Amy Joyce’s On Parenting article, “How helicopter parents are ruining college students” posted on September 2, 2014, Joyce addresses the issue with parents who controls their college student’s life to the public. Amy’s exigence is from an article recently published in the journal Education + Training found that there is an important line to draw between parental involvement and over-parenting.
The main concern of this article, is the impression that students perceive they can coast through higher education with their parents nurturing and protecting them as they did throughout high school.
When a student goes off to college, they begin to no longer rely on their parents as much as they once have. The majority of college students choose to live on campus. They start becoming more independent. They learn to make their own food, do their homework and clean up after themselves without being told, and they start providing for themselves for the most part. They discover they have to be responsible with their money because they now have tuition to pay; and books, tuition, and other miscellaneous items to buy. They also gain a better sense of responsibility by deciding their major and choosing their career
There is a very big issue among most colleges throughout the world, but more specifically right here at John Brown University. Over parenting, often referred to as “helicopter parenting”, seems to be spreading wildly and effecting how students react specifically to their first year of college. Parents that don’t allow their kids to develop their own sense of self-reliance and handling task at home, create John Brow University freshmen that are unprepared for daily college life and the workforce. The first year away from home can truly make or break a person. Parents are no longer around to pacify problems that arise and responsibilities are stacked heavily upon the first year students. This is a pressing issue to not only the college, but also
Individuals are worried about parents who aren't required in the lives of their children and their education. A few parents are pushing their children to a great extent, little by little along into schools and careers to trust that they earn a degree or just basically be impeccable in life. Parents even continue demanding to the educators and mentors to make certain that their kid isn't screwing up. For a child with parents who are nagging their children about their education find that in each test, quiz, or exam is a make or break moment for these kids. In fact, students in high school are experiencing depression and anxiety about universities that might not even acknowledge them since they can't be good enough. In the meantime, parents believe that if their child doesn't come from a school they will have no future or a profession. In addition, the individuals who are over-parenting children who hope for them to succeed in life ought to give a cherishing establishment to them in their
Next fall, it is estimated nearly 13.3 million students are expected to attend a four-year American university or college to pursue a degree. College is an exciting time for exploration and full of new experiences for students, but as for parents, it is a time of letting go and often results in feelings of loss. Having a child share a home for eighteen years, and then suddenly leave for school to seek their own independence and begin a new chapter of their life can cause parents to feel less purposeful. They may begin to feel as though their life is less meaningful because they are no longer carefully guiding their child through every decision they make; in a way, both the college student and their parent must discover their own independence.