Comparison Between Andrea Roman And Amy Tan Relationships With Their Parents

In present-day society, families go through several problems and arguments regarding numerous issues which would have been considered unacceptable in past times. Throughout a variety of different cultures, the level of respect and obedience for one’s parents has diminished while the negotiation of conformity and rebellion has risen. This statement is supported and evidential in two different stories, “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan and “Everyday Use” by Alice Walker. Although these stories represent different cultures, they both exemplify the values and importance of family relations; as well as demonstrate in every culture families face social problems. In both these stories, two major topics stood out which allowed me to compare each one to one

Well-known author Amy Tan, in her short narrative “Fish Cheeks”, writes about the embarrassment she has because of her culture and ethnicity. She talks about this when a white father and his son, Robert, whom she likes, want to come over her house, and as a chinese-american young woman, she is a little ashamed of the chinese food. She also is ashamed by the type of house and environment she lives in.

Most parents impose very high expectations on their children. While some expect their sons to become professionals in respected fields, others encourage their daughters to find good husbands. The parents impose these expectations without consulting their children. In most situations, the expectations of the parent deviate from the dreams of the child. This is what becomes evident when one reads Sandra Cisneros’ Only Daughter and Amy Tan’s Mother Tongue. In these short stories, the expectations that the parents of the narrators elicit mixed reactions. The expectations of the narrators’ parents hold them back from attaining personal goals while causing them to desperately desire approval and eventually accepting and embracing their parents..

What is it like to be born in one country and then grow up in another where people speak a different language and follow different traditions? And is it easy to grow up in another country where members of the native country pressure one to be "one of their own"? If anyone wishes to find insightful and interesting answers to these questions, one should go no further than read Lac Su's I Love Yours Are for White People. In this book, Lac tells the story of his child- and adolescent-hood, growing up in "urban" Los Angeles as a Vietnamese living with a "traditional" Vietnamese family. As Lac demonstrates in the book, he once was between two worlds, sometimes unable to figure out who he was, and sometimes rejecting one or the other altogether. After going through difficult and painful experiences, Lac learns to embrace his ethnic identity. He realizes that he is a Vietnamese-American who belongs to both cultures. He learns to appreciate his Vietnamese background but also acknowledges that he is partly American because some Vietnamese habits are so uncommon for him.

Culture affects people’s perspectives of the world and others through their upbringing and how, when, and where they were raised. In the essay, “An Indian Father’s Plea,” Robert Lake writes about how his Indian child’s traditional way of learning is different from those in western education systems and that he's not a “slow” learner but learns in a different way from his peers. In the personal essay, “Two Ways to Belong in America,” Bharati Mukherjee describes her differing views of living in America with her sister, despite both being raised in India. In the poem, “My Mother Pieced Quilts,” by Teresa Palomo Acosta, Teresa how this quilt that her mother made for her involves all these pieces of her past that are stitched together. In the

In the personal essay, “Two Ways to Belong in America,” by Bharati Mukherjee, there are two different cultural views between sisters, Bharati and Mira. Bharati and Mira grew up in India, but both moved to America. The sisters have the same cultural background, but have different cultural views now. They have different views on the current debate over the status of immigrants. They both have lived in the United States for 35 years. Bharati married someone from Canada, Mira married an Indian student. “In Iowa City in 1963, I married a fellow student, an American of Canadian percentage,” both Bharati and Mira married fellow students. (Mukherjee 70) “We dressed alike, in saris,” Bharati and Mira used to dress alike, but Bharati changed the way she dressed, Mira did not.

Immigrants often did not know English well and were largely unfamiliar with the traditions and customs which left them vulnerable and regularly looking to their children for guidance since they had more contact with American culture in school. If the parents felt resistant to adopting the American culture, their children were often quick to adopt the American clothes and social interactions, which fractured the family structure. Parents often did not want to practice this culture, however, “[Children] affected by these Americanizing influences, sometimes tried to force American customs on their parents. Families who did wish to “Americanize” their households to fit the domestic ideal found it difficult to give up tradition, often mothers had a very difficult time loosening the control she had over the household. Mothers became the target of Americanization campaigns because of her lack of contact with American values, which often causes mothers to feel resentment, and to grow more selective about what institutions they choose to accept into their families’ traditions and values.

This example serves to prove that the longstanding social values system of Amerasian parents, despite having old world views and values from back in the day, cannot necessarily be used to solve or understand the changing complexities, demands and requirements of society in western hemisphere and the individual personal choices (and even sexual ones) made by their children who live by altered standards and norms in today’s post-modern world. HOM seems to think that Ms Lee has what Alvin Toffler coined future shock and coping skills problem is evidenced by Lee saying: “I didn’t accept it for a long time. I didn’t think that she would come in the open like that”. I thought that she would just keep it and later get married”.

For example, in a personal essay “Two Ways to Belong in America” by Bharati Mukherjee states, “I was prepared for(and even welcomed) the emotional strain that came with marrying outside my ethnic community,”(pg.83). In this period of the story Bharati, the author, married an American, Canadian man, but is in the knowledge of her breaking the chain of her heritage where her father chooses the groom. The marriage that Bharati has with her non Indian husband, shows that she now sees America as her new home, but there comes to a point where one's culture is left behind and views about others are different. Additionally, in the same story Bharati confirms, “We would endure our two years in America, secure our degrees, then return to India to marry the grooms of my father’s choosing,”(Mukherjee pg.83). Bharati is explaining her and her sister’s, Mira, plan of their stay in America.

Some may believe that culture rarely informs the way a person views others and the world. Though one may believe people’s views on others and the world are rarely influenced by culture, in the end it does, even if one doesn’t believe so at first. Amy Tan in the excerpt from the novel “Two Kinds” shows a mother who had a bit of an open mind towards the American culture, as she thought in America anybody could be free to do whatever they dreamed. According to Amy Tan, “America was where all of my mother’s hopes lay.” (Tan p.22). In this line, she shows the readers how her mother was open, and actually hopeful of the American culture which was different than where she came from, China. Her views on a culture that is fairly different than hers may influence one to believe

In a world so massive, full of opposing influences and contrasting people, sometimes we cannot help but struggle and fight to identify and defend our own unique identity. In Amy Tan’s short story, “Two Kinds,” a young Chinese American girl, Jing-mei, battles over her identity with her Chinese native-born mother who believes “you could be anything you wanted to be in America,” (Tan 1). As Jing-mei’s mother bombards her with silly test from magazines, TV shows, and what seems like unattainably high expectations, the feeling of failure begins to settle within Jing-mei. Jing-mei then decides to use passive aggressive behavior to resist her mother's desire for her to become a prodigy, until at last a brutal exchange of words silences her mother

Deeper cultural and ethnic differences directed how my parents acted around each other. My father came from a family where communication was handled differently from my mother’s family.

Being part of a culture is one of the major factors that determine people’s identity; as it is the case of Eva Hoffman and Elizabeth Wong. Eva comes from a polish family that immigrated to Canada after the World War II while Elizabeth is not actually an immigrant, but an American born from Chinese parents. Despite these differences and their antagonistic backgrounds, both girls had struggled with their cultural heritage during their youth years.

Everyone is different and has their own culture or beliefs. It takes courage to reflect your culture and show that you are different, just like Amy Tan’s mother said, “You must be proud you are different”. Amy Tan the author of “Fish Cheeks” battles with herself through a dinner with an American boy she liked, named Richard while she thought that he would not enjoy her Chinese Christmas. Meanwhile, Anna Quindlen, the author of “Melting Pot”, describes how much her diverse neighborhood had changed over the years. The theme that Everyone is different and has their own culture or beliefs. It takes courage for oneself reflect their culture and show that they are different is a common thread that not only runs through “Fish Cheeks” and “Melting Pot” but is also important in my life (or our world today).

I met Erin in the first day of kindergarten, and she is still my dearest friend. It’s scary to think about what my life would be like if I hadn’t met her, what kind of friends I would have made. My views on life would have been completely different. While growing up I never had a sense of what was culturally acceptable in social or public situations, but Erin always did. Erin’s moral beliefs shaped by her father have extremely shaped who I am and who I want to become. I remember me and Erin coming home from school one day after we both bombed a test and Blair had said well if you don’t want to try hard and work you guys can just stay in Sydney and become hair dressers. Well that hit us like a