David's Observation

I Am David is a about a young boy named David who escapes from a concentration camp with the help of an unnamed prison guard. David has spent his whole life in a concentration camp and has to learn what normal kids his age should act like and common knowledge to the rest of the world. The title of the book, I Am David, has an important meaning throughout the book because he recites it to himself to remind him that he is his own person and no one has the right to control over him as seen in the quote, “He took a deep breath and shivered. He was David. Everything else was washed away, the camp, its smell, its touch--and now he was David, his own master, free--free as long as he could remain so.”(32); similarly, he also uses this phrase at the

In the novel The Chrysalids by John Wyndham it explains the life of a boy named David

Hello Rozhnaz! This writing looks better than the previous one that I revised; congrats! You also gain improvement in terms of the use of academic vocabularies in this essay. Some notes to be considered here are the minor things such as punctuation, redundant expression, and capitalization. Here are several takes on your writing:

The piece was very clear and easy to ready. I appreciated how you blended the answers together so that it provided a interesting piece instead of something that sounded like simply question and answer. Furthermore, your syntax was wonderful. The only comment would be that more details or justifications would have been highly beneficial.

A few areas that the writing specialist pointed out in which I need to review and refresh. 1. Fully

On February 28, 1993, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms (ATF) raided the Branch Davidian ranch in Mount Carmel, a rural area near Waco, Texas. The raid resulted in the deaths of four agents and five Davidians. The subsequent 51-day siege ended on April 19 when the compound was completely consumed by fire killing seventy-five men, women, and children, including the leader David Koresh.

Plz review..... if you feel like you have a better "way to say something" please feel free to make corrections

You story flowed nicely from the beginning to the end. Your story had little or no grammatical or sentence fluency errors. I could tell you took a lot of time to perfect your story.

A strength that was observed through the case vignette was Angela and David being financially sable to be able to meet the needs of Isaac and Anton. Furthermore they seemed to have a good relationship with the boys. In fact, they were hoping to adopt both Isaac and Anton. In regards to Kyla, she had shown that she cared about Isaac and Anton. In fact, she was hoping to get them back one day. Kyla also showed that she is aware of what she needed to do in order to get her sons back. For example, she knew that she had to move from the transitional housing program to one that would also allow Isaac and Anton. Kyla had also shown having hopes and dreams, such as wanting to return to high school.

In reviewing the essay, there are many errors I noticed. Overall, your writing lacks focus in regards to ideas, grammar, and spelling. I am no expert in any of these areas, but my ability to produce a coherent essay is demonstrated by the fact that I am nearly done with college. The goal of my essay is to guide you towards a better way of writing based on my prior experiences. A good essay in my experience is one that has three major components: structure, depth, and voice.

In the essays David's details of his life claim much more reliable for someone reading his essay: a true story of the author's life allows the reader to relate to the facts. He claims that his mother struggles to stay afloat financially and can only afford fast food restaurants. As a result, he became a "clumsy thrash tallow" (392). Within his personal narrative, he uses the image making it easier for the reader to imagine what he is missing during his narrative, he writes that adolescents who live like he will never cross "under the golden arches for a probable fate of lifelong obesity "(392). he makes use of this image so that readers can imagine someone walking under the golden arches of McDonald's and leaving the other side overweight and

Ill thinks long and hard about my opening sentence and after I’ve come up with a good one the words just come into my head and I type them. Then I reread them to make sure that they make sense. Since I’m still in high school I do think that my writing style really has room to grow as I discover myself and who I want to be. I’d say that my process could improve, there’s always someone can improve or makes themselves better. For right now I think my process works, I think it works because I’ve never received a bad grade on something I written. Sure, my drafts have always had lots of red marks but doesn’t everyone’s? Like I said you can always improve and that’s what I’d really like to do in English

As we examine the heroes of the faith outlined for us in the Old Testament, we would be hard pressed to find a more faithful man that King David. After the death of King Saul, David became the King of the Hebrew people. David, who was meek and pious, steadfastly believed in the true God and tried to do His will. He had endured much persecution from Saul and other enemies but did not become bitter, did not lift his hand against Saul, as he was the Lord’s anointed, but placed all his hope in God, and the Lord delivered him from all his enemies.

I number one question that I would like my readers, as they peruse my piece, to answer is, "How can I improve my writing? How can I be a better communicator?