Family arranged marriages in India versus self-arranged marriages in the United States
Marriage has been defined in numerous terms by different cultures. The factors that play into creating a successful, happy marriage are viewed differently by people in different cultures. Family arranged marriage has been the tradition in Indian culture. Modernization, globalization, and urbanization have brought about the concept of self-arranged marriage from Western cultures, such as the United States. Despite these efforts, family arranged marriage still outnumbers marriages of love or self-arranged. According to Devika Chawla in her essay on Hindu arranged marriages, 95% of all Hindu marriages in India are still arranged (2007). Nice job of …show more content…
Self-arranged marriages in India are considered non-righteous unions; one reason is due in part to not following the ideals of a patrilineal society. Nice job of explaining the why of this cultural behaviorThe unions are considered “female emphasized” (Chawla, 2007). The bride has more economic and social freedoms in a self-arranged marriage. She is able to keep her stridhana and she is able to keep her own bride-price.
The change in times brought about more rights for females such as property rights and a surge in the women’s workface, allowing women to not be so economically dependent on men. With this trend, you would think women would seek more self-arranged marriages to assert their independence, but that is not the case and family-arranged marriages are still very prevalent (Bumiller, 1990). Then what are the benefits to having an arranged marriage?again, great job of pulling the Why of this behavior. In a study completed by Chawla (2004), she took a look at 20, middle-class women from Punjabi, South Delhi, who were all in family-arranged marriages (Chawla, 2007). She found that these women had agreed to arranged marriages, but that did not mean that they did not play a part in the mates that were selected for them. All of the women had provided criteria, which they wanted in a groom, to their parents. The criterion that was laid out is similar to the principle factors that women in the United States look for in mates. Those criteria were: material
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Arranged marriage may sound strange in the United States as it is impractical in this country. According to Gagoomal. Arranged marriage is broadly defined as unions in which people other than the bride and groom, typically parents or other family members, play important or decisive roles in determining who marries whom I strongly believe that the arranged marriage is a good choice and beneficial because an arranged marriage is believed to guarantee a mate for us, more stable compared to a love marriage in terms of love, and leads to perpetual happiness. it is difficult to find a mate nowadays especially in the United States because people are very busy with their work and have no time to find life partner. This is due to the job prospect as many countries are rapidly developing.
Arranged marriage is found in various cultures and countries around the world, including Afghanistan and other parts of the Middle East; having an arranged marriage is thought of as an Afghani tradition and has been a part of life for many families. The practice of arranged marriage has advantages and disadvantages; it can create more family power and give more financial security. Sadly being forced into a marriage can disrupt the independence of the engaged, most women stop their education when they become engaged resulting in many women being illiterate. This makes it impossible for them to be successful without depending on their husbands. Arranged marriage is found in many cultures throughout the modern world, though in a lot of cases it results in a happy family it can also be very limiting on women and often girls are married before they can give consent.
For many people, an arranged marriage is not a great choice to choose a life partner, but it is highly recommended in Hindu culture. In the speech “Finding Love in Arranged Marriages” on Tedx Talks, Omar Durrani shared, like other people who have Hindu religion, he was put under pressure to have arranged marriage by his mother. She believed in arranged marriage, which marriage comes first and love comes after marriage. She contacted matchmaker service to find a suitable woman for him. The matchmaker found many women who were interested in Omar, but Omar was not interested in any of them until he heard about one woman that her mother found for him. Although he did not believe that arrange married would work for him, he still agreed to start talking on the phone with the woman. Surprisingly, he found that they shared many common interests. Finally, they decided to meet each other, so Omar took a flight from Miami to Chicago for the meeting. The first feeling they had for each other was that they made for each other. They engaged in the next day after the first meeting and married one year later. Like Omar’s family, most Indian people prefer arranged marriage since they believe that will be the best to start their marriage life. Arranged married may be a short or a long process that depends on each situation. While love marriage is found when people love each other and get married, arranged marriages happen when parents decide who will be their children’s life partner. People with Hindu religion believe that arranged marriages are more successful than love marriages since of its typical features of the process of selecting a life partner.
In our society, we wouldn’t consider arranged marriages as a normal thing we are, use to consensual heterosexual serial monogamy. But in some countries, they do consider arranged marriages normal. In India, arranged marriages have been apart of the Indian culture since the fourth century and many consider it a central fabric of Indian society (Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India, 2000). Pakistan also considers arranged marriages as normal in Pakistani culture elders of the family are considered wise and they are the ones who help pick out a spouse a family member (Arranged Marriages are the Part of Pakistani Culture, 2012). Japan still practices arranged marriage but now less than ten percent of marriages are arranged compared to half a century ago when about seventy percent were arranged(Tying the Knot, 1998). In China, they have marriage markets where parents line the pathways share with other parents their clippings they have on their child, hoping to find a good match for their child (Epatko, 2015). Still, today many countries consider arranged marriages normal.
The source culturalindia.net states that “a marriage is termed as arranged when it is arranged by people other than those getting married”. Arranged marriages in India have been around
Also, this type of marriage is chosen because of social status. A rich family will want their heir to marry into a family that is worth their status. And lastly, very religious and cultural son and daughters will just agree to an arranged marriage because of the way they have been brought up since childhood and they know that they will not have to worry about their parents of not approving or rejecting of their choice of spouse.
Marriage practices vary across cultures. Every culture has its own way of conducting marriage according to their traditions and customs. Most cultures share common customs and practices, while some cultures have unique practices. Marriage refers to a social union agreed upon by the couples to unit as spouses. The union of couples implies sexual relations, permanence in union, and procreation. This research paper focuses on comparing marriage practices in American and Indian culture. There is significant difference between the two cultures in marriage practices.
In the book, Arranged Marriage, by Chitra Divakaruni there are multiple stories that demonstrate arranged marriages from within the Indian culture. In some cases, arranged marriages work out better than others. However, in the short stories in her book, most don’t work out positively. In the short stories, “The Bats” and “The Disappearance”, the arranged marriages don’t work out. Chitra Divakaruni’s viewpoint on arranged marriages is clearly negative, due to violence, and the effect on children.
The author begins with the basics of marriages in India, explaining that arranged marriages are so common that marriages not setup have a special term. She goes on to speak of how the couples set to wed usually do not meet before the ceremony and that if they do, it is for only a momentary conversation after the decisions have been made. However, she points out, that if one person objects to the match that the parents agreed to, they do not have to wed.
The parents of a bride and groom made the decision as to who their child would marry with no consideration of their child’s wishes or needs. These arranged marriages were created more like business decisions than romantic unions of men and women. These marriages were usually arranged between a bride and groom who came from families with like economic backgrounds. (Tamura, E., 1997) Additionally, these arranged marriages were not harmonious unions.
In modern culture and fully developed nations, the ideology of an arranged marriage is a foreign concept, but in reality the global percentage of arranged marriages is 60 (Toledo 1). Although the majority of these arranged marriages occur in Asian countries such as India and China, this type of matrimony should also be prominently implemented into the society of modernized nations like the United States. Before arranged marriages can completely fuse into industrialized cultures, one must fully understand the concept of an arranged marriage. As commonly thought, parents do not always select the marital partners in arranged marriages; spouses can also be chosen by a community, elders, matchmakers, or religious leaders ("Arranged...
Most girls in these circumstances are younger than me. If I had to have my parents choose my lifelong partner, I would change my name and move to Mexico. If our society was like India’s people, there would be no way I could settle for that conformity. There is no law saying the girls must follow through with marriage; however, whether they would like to or not, girls still do it for their parents and tradition. Indians do not see arranged marriages as being wrong. They think that “brides are the embodiment of that family's honor and pride” (“Arranged Marriages and Dowry”). But, us in the West see this tradition as an unnecessary custom. Rejection from your own blood, your own friends, and your own people, is not right. No dowry in the world could pay for love. Love is an emotion worth more than all of the money in the
From the perspective of a Utilitarian, one would argue that arranged marriage is both ethical and unethical. A utilitarian decides whether an action is good or bad based on the results that bring the greatest good to the greatest number of people affected by the action. The so called good can be defined as “happiness.” In India, places where arranged marriage are very common because it is part of their culture. Therefore in a Utilitarian eyes it would be ethical to get married if it were part of your culture and geographical location because betraying your culture would do more harm and some forms of happiness are superior to others. Many couples find themselves to be part of happy marriages like we saw in the article What It’s Really Like To Have An Arranged Marriage. Sandaya, the bride, who lived in India had an arranged marriage set by her parents. She felt honored to have done this for her family and knew it was a