Gender and Communication: Is it Social or Biological?
Imagine the moon and the sun having an opportunity to communicate, what would they talk about? How would it come across? Although the two constellations dwell in the same galaxy, it’s pretty clear they do not see the world the same way. Their perception of the world appears different just like when it comes to women, men and communication. The sexes seem to have difficulties understanding each other. Misinterpretation is a common happening when a female talks to a male and vice versa. The other sex has a hard time figuring out what the other means; a simple “ok” or “I’m fine” can carry so many meanings when used in a conversation, or argument. “Ok” can mean simply ok, but in an
…show more content…
Communication differences can be traced back to the human biology. Females have some male testosterone hormone and men have some progesterone and estrogen in their body. Maybe this is the reason why the genders have a hard time communicating with one another. In the words of John Gray “Both the Martians and Venusians forgot that they were from different planets and were supposed to be different. In one morning, everything they had learned about their differences was erased from their memory. And since that day, men and women have been in conflict” (11). What Gray is trying to push across is that gender differences have been there since birth. Females having XX chromosome and Males having XY chromosome, there have always been a genetic/biological difference in the way the two genders address and see one another. In “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: a Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in a Relationship ”, Gray reasons that men and women have diverse communication styles, needs, goals, and values, and that the key to a successful relationship between the genders are for both to understand these differences. Gray mentions some differences that include women wanting to feel treasured and men wanting to feel necessary, and women wanting respect and commitment and men wanting appreciation and admiration. He also talks about women being relationship oriented and men being goal oriented. He explains that when it
Deborah Tannen and William Lutz both discuss the difficulty of communicating. Their point of views may be different, but their conclusion is the same. Men and women have difficulties of communicating. Not because the two genders want to be complicated but simply because we don’t realize how or what we’re doing when it’s happening.
Men and women communicate in very different ways. Men want to see the solution, they want to just get straight to the point and then be done with the situation. Women on the other hand tend to be more detail-oriented before they get to
The typical stereotypes of communication are that women talk more than men, that is not necessarily true. For example, Tannen states, “...another explanation is that men think women talk to much because they hear women talking in situations where men would not: on the telephone; or in social situations with friends, when they are not discussing topics that men find inherently interesting, or; like the couple at the women’s group, at home alone-in other words, in private speaking” (Cooper and MacDonald 11). Men and women have two different conversational styles, different ways of talking. They also have different ideas of what is important and what is not. For example, Tannen points out that the man thought it wasn’t important that his friend was getting married, but the woman had thought that it was important (Cooper and MacDonald 12).
The articles “Sex, Lies and Conversation: Why is it Hard for Men and Women to Talk to each other” by Deborah Tannen and “Speaking Different Languages” by John Gray are about how men and women often misunderstand each other which causes conflicts and or arguments. When a woman says something it usually has a deeper meaning, but men are usually more direct when speaking; this leads to conflicts and relationship problems. According to Tannen and Gray, men and women can adjust their thinking to minimize misunderstanding by translating each other’s dialect, by understanding their different ways of listening, and different body languages.
In the essay Sex, Lies, and Conversation Deborah Tannen focuses on the differences and lack of communication between men and women though observations. She came to the conclusion that men were not lacking in their listening, but they were however listening in a different way than the women did. On the other hand, men aren’t the only people that have terrible communication skills. In many ways, these differences between the two genders can cause major conflict when not understood by the opposite side. A few examples of lack of communication may be when women don’t decide where they would like to eat, men who walk away from an argument rather than talking it out, and their decision making processes.
In Sex, Lies, and Conversation by Deborah Tannen, she does a good job in identifying the problems between how males and females communicate, and the reasons behind it. Going back as far as our childhood. She explains how as children, we usually play with kids of the same sex. Thus already creating different social circles, like the many different tribes in a jungle. Within these groups, male and females communicate and play in different ways. Males would prefer to create a platonic relationship through play, with examples of sports or activities. Where as females predominantly prefer to gossip or discuss topics in a calm setting. Causing different gendered children to become adaptive to one type of relationship building. As the children grow up, they are accustomed to the means of segregated communication.
How one communicates is also influenced by gender. Studies show that ones sex can place a person in a gender role expectation. Women and Men communicate differently and because sexual identity is defined through same sex parent or role model, women and men can get into gender role expectations. These expectations influence their perception attitudes and behavior that will result in a communication style. This early self-concept can effect each one's interpersonal relations. Women for instance are much-attached human beings they have very early identification with their mothers, and this can cause an on going pattern of role expectation. It can lead to interpersonal communication skills that are very nurturing and understanding. Women are not threatened by intimacy and communicating at a close range with people. Similarly, men also have an early identification process not with their mother, but their fathers. Men tend to be fairly reserved, and quite. Men are most comfortable when there is a level of separation. This male role will contribute to the communication processes and it can cause communication to
Male and female differ in their use of communication because their reasons for communicating are different. Men
Communication is an ongoing process in which individuals exchange messages whose meanings are influenced by the history of the relationship and the experiences of the participants. (Adler, p.384) Communication depends on relationships between the people who are communicating, and on common basics between them. Problems in communications between people may arise due to differences in cultures, perceptions, values, and expectations from life.
There exists a disparity in the communication phenomenon between men and women. This disparity according to scholars can be attributed to the male dominance in the society today and relationship tensions between couples. A study on cross-sex conversations showed that, when men and women engage in a friendly conversation, they do so as equals but they do not play the same roles in the communication. Women tend to ask more questions and likely to utter utterances that encourage responses from the other speaker. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to interrupt their partner’s conversations and make direct opinions and facts to control or dominate the conversation. Thus, the communication phenomenon between men and women is strikingly distinct.
In the process of going through an American Sign Language (ASL) interpreter training program, one cannot help but notice a substantial gender gap. For every fifteen females, there are (perhaps) one or two males. Research has suggested that females make up around 85% of the ASL interpreting field (RID, 2014). Does this significate gender differential have an effect on clientele message? This paper hopes to explore that precise question. Through the course of this paper, I will uncover the differences in communication styles between males and females. Additionally, I conducted a survey of interpreters as well as clients in order to gain insight into the possible effects this differential has on clientele. The online qualitative survey allowed me to compare and contrast responses from a small sample of interpreters and clients. The most significant information I gathered related to awareness. Interpreters, it seems, are aware that their gender impacts the client’s message and are taking steps to remedy that. I plan to explore some of these potential solutions within this paper.
How one communicates is also influenced by gender. Studies show that ones sex can place a person in a gender role expectation. Women and Men communicate differently and because sexual identity is defined through same sex parent or role model, women and men can get into gender role expectations. These expectations influence their perception attitudes and behavior that will result in a communication style. This early self-concept can effect each one's interpersonal relations. Women for instance are much-attached human beings they have very early identification with their mothers, and this can cause an on going pattern of role expectation. It can lead to interpersonal
Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of
Communication is a crucial part of our daily lives which can be interpreted in various ways. Although, many couples think they have no problems communicating with each other; however, the issue among genders still exists. Learning to talk and listen can improve relationships in many ways. Therefore, Deborah Tannen, John Gray, Susan Page, and John Gottman focused on improving communication skills between genders.
Communication had its verbal and nonverbal understandings, but they also have their misunderstandings. Body language has industrialized itself with different types of language that were brought up by the society. Men and women weren’t use to these body languages towards the similar gender. Miscommunication has been a problem when dealing with these differences. Men and women continue to build body languages that only made sense to themselves and not to the opposite gender. Although one defeats the other in a