1. Thesis: I think your thesis is strong and obvious throughout your paper. So I don’t think that will be something you need to change dramatically. Instead, I think the main thing you should focus on for Draft 2 is organizing your paper so it is all supporting information for your thesis. In both your background and analysis section, ask yourself whether the information is there to support your thesis or whether it a secondary point. If it is a secondary point, then I probably wouldn’t include it.
2. Organization: I would encourage you to try and increase your use of both umbrella paragraphs and topic/thesis sentences. Generally, at the beginning of each section or subsection, you should have an umbrella/roadmap paragraph to explain what is to come. That way a reader really understanding where you are going and how things fit together. Same with topic/thesis sentences. From a structural point of view, your background may end up being a bit long. You want your background to be shorter than your analysis section. At your current fourteen pages, you may want to watch out for the background section overshadowing the analysis section. I think there is some room to cut, but you are going to have to figure out what it ends up being important to your thesis, and what is noise that is only related to your thesis.
3. Background: I think you are off to a good start with your background section. I would consider providing more organization or context for the section on the PLCAA. As
Be sure to begin with a strong hook and include a thesis statement that lays out your main argument, supporting details, and a good conclusion.
After writing a few drafts for my argumentative essay I have discovered the importance of outlining my papers. I started with a few topics to choose from: social media, gun control, and the importance of schooling. After selecting my topic or social media, I narrowed down a point I wanted to make revolving around social media. I feel my topic is a powerful topic. After I wrote I my first draft, I realized I had to change a few things. Such as how many topics I wanted to discuss, their relevance, and how far in depth I would be able to go, while only using two and a half pages. My topics consisted of bullying, criminal activity, peer pressure, predators, and famous influences. After reviewing and studying my words I
Step 7: Create an Outline: Now that you have a thesis, you can move on to creating an outline to organize your essay. On the next page is a sample outline that can be used on any essay.
1. A social category of people who share a common culture, language, national background or religion is referred to as a(n) _____. A. minority group B. dominant group C. racial group D. ethnic group
Research paper outline CAREER RESEARCH OUTLINE Use this outline template with the following main topics. I. Thesis/Introduction A. What is this paper about? 1.
Which brings me to the next brainstorming strategy I used, I listed all the questions I could relate to that body paragraph and answered all of them. I found both of these strategies to be quite helpful and were very productive. The biggest problem I had writing this paper was the verbosity, I was trying to get to the point and ended up just confusing myself and those who read it for me. To fix my problem I read allowed the essay many times until I could find the perfect medium that sounded right. A strength within my essay would be how in depth the understanding of the text is while the weakness is the length of the text. I learned that I can write a longer essay without trying to drag it on. In most texts there is enough information to fill up the pages, you just need to dig deeper and find the information.
As a result of the Civil War being a war of freedom, (combine your this is because sentence ideas here..)
* Recruits quickly set into reality with a medical examination that left with barely enough strength to crawl into their barracks
Your claim or thesis statement is the most important part of your argumentative essay. It is the sentence where you state your main argument and outline how you will prove it. There are many ways to structure a thesis statement, but we will work on one specific model: counter-claim-reasons (CCR). Here is an example:
The health care industry continues to be challenged by daily patient turnover due to the number of admissions, transfers, and discharges (Spader, 2008). The increase in number of admissions, in turn, puts a high demand on nurses in keeping up with the pace resulting in nurse frustration and dissatisfaction. According to Lane (2009), a thorough and comprehensive admission process is critical in providing quality patient care. Completing the admission process in a timely, efficient, and comprehensive manner has
I had a difficult time getting started because I did not know where to begin. At first, I could not figure out how to connect my topic sentences to each of my body paragraphs, transitioning between body paragraphs, and I had a hard time connecting my thesis statement to the rest of my essay. On top of that, when I first wrote my rough draft for the movie Get Out, I wrote down everything that occurred during the film, and as a result, my essay was over the paper limit, which was three pages. I tried to cut it down,however, I had a difficult time doing so because I was not sure as to what information was relevant and what was irrelevant in my paper. In addition, once I summarized the main ideas of the movie I had to respond to it, and it was not an easy task.
After creating a strong thesis you should create an essay outline to ensure that your current and
With the increase in humans populating the planet, there comes a need for more and more resources, as well as more highways for transportation, leading to more cars on the road, and ultimately more greenhouse gas emissions. Greenhouse gas activity is obtained by subtracting the long wave radiation which escapes the earth from the estimated radiation emitted by the ocean surface (A.Raval, V.Ramanathan 1989). The escaping radiation has been measured since 1985 by the Earth Radiation Budget Experiment (ERBE) through the use of three orbiting satellites that sense longwave and shortwave radiation escaping the atmosphere. The estimated ocean radiation is found through direct use of the Stefan-Boltzmann law given the average temperature of the ocean surface. There seems to be a huge controversy about these greenhouse gases and how they affect the climate, and whether they even affect the global climate. This is not the first time in the earth’s history that a major climate change has occurred, referring back to the Ice Age when humans were nonexistent. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) reports predict that the average global temperature will rise about 2 - 4.5 degrees Celsius in the next 100 years, causing some drastic changes to the current environment (Lynch and Jenkins 2007). But if a major change in climate occurred without
Thesis/Focus/Purpose I agree that your overall introduction is well-defined and well situated on the context of your issue. However, your thesis is not as clear as it should. “Researching ways to get an edge in sports results in many strategies, but sports psychology is the key to out-perform others by enhancing a player’s skill sets in multiple ways producing none other than winners”. It does not show what strategies your research will focus on and it looks more like a general statement.
¶ 1 Topic Sentence: In examining Kurt Vonnengut’s Slaughterhouse-Five, we can illuminate the faults in Weisenburger’s theory of satire dichotomy, as well as illuminate the nature of the satirical qualities of Slaughterhouse-Five itself.