The Myth Of Co-Parenting By Hope Edelman

Decent Essays

“The Myth of Co-Parenting; How it Was Supposed to Be. How it Was” by Hope Edelman and “My problem with Her Anger” by Eric Bartels both explain the strain child rearing and lack of communication can put upon a marriage. The two articles describe their personal experiences with this issue, but the authors have differing points of view on the subject. Although they have different perspectives, both Edelman and Bartels explore ideas of traditional gender roles and unrealistic expectations in relationships. Edelman discusses the idea of compromising and letting go of expectations in her article, “The Myth of Co-Parenting; How it Was Supposed to Be. How it Was” She explains that she had certain expectations of what marriage and raising …show more content…

He explains that although they both do their part, the majority of the work falls on his wife, but no matter how hard he works to help her he is never thanked for it. Stating “I work hard to take pressure off her and have given up some freedoms … What gets me though, is how little credit I get for the effort” (Bartels 58). The problem with Bartels expecting to be thanked for helping his wife is that it’s not just his wife's job to take care of the kids on her own. He should help her because it’s also his job to take care of the children and isn’t something that requires gratitude. Bartels desire to be thanked for a job that he and his wife have both taken on provides an example of how deeply ingrained these ideas are. Men don’t usually take on the job of caretaker so when Bartels did he assumed he would at least receive appreciation for doing so while his wife understood that it was just more work she was supposed to do and didn’t require recognition for it.
The idea of women being the ‘nurturers’ and the men being the ‘providers’ has been around for ages. Both articles suggest that this idea no longer fits in with the modern ideas of marriage because marriage is now seen as an equally shared experience. The concept that the work in a marriage and raising children should be shared equally between partners has become an expectation. Each article points out expectations their partners have and how these assumptions lead to angry

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