Tyranny of the Shoulds

Decent Essays

The late psychoanalysis Karen Horney came up with the idea of the "tyranny of the shoulds." She described the "tyranny of the shoulds" as being are the forces pressed on us by parents, peers, socio-economic class, teachers, career counselors, pop psychology, opinionated relatives and friends and the elusive ‘conventional wisdom ' (Richardson, 2006) . They tell us the many things we should or shouldn 't do. These "shoulds" can be seen in anyone 's life, especially in the lives of college students. Three particular "tyranny of the shoulds" that could apply directly to college students include, "I should get done with school in four years, I should make my parents happy as well as myself, and I should know how to balance school, work, …show more content…

I also carried the "should" that "I should get good grades regardless of whether I learn anything." Being in college has allowed me to realize that it is more important to learn material than it is to get a good grade on a test. With this realization I have been able to stop obsessing over tests and use that time to understand material. Of course for every tyranny I have lost I may have gained another one. Personally I think that the only way to break the

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