Daddy’s Hands
Teenage girls’ lives are shaped in many different ways. Everything is a big deal to a teenage girl; what she wears, what she participates in, and who she dates. A girl’s relationship with her father strongly influences her life. Whether the relationship with her father is good or bad, the daughter will be effected by it. There are four main types of fathers: the Absentee Father, the Intermittent Father, the Abusive Father, and the Perfect Father. A father’s relationship with his daughter influences her opinion of men, therefore she judges every man based on her father’s example. This impacts her dating life, social life, and leads to more relationship issues with men throughout life. A girl’s life is greatly impacted by her
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He may have died or left before she was born. This may cause his daughter to feel like she does not deserve love from any man. She might think that she is not worth the time it takes to build a relationship. An article from Contemporary Nurse helped me reach these conclusions. It says, “The narratives presented have revealed that the absence of their fathers from their everyday lives have generated relationships that are lacking in closeness and intimacy, despite the desire of the participants wanting to establish a close father-daughter bond with their fathers” (East, Jackson, O’Brien, 2006). A father leaving could also make his daughter believe she does not need a man in her life at all, and she becomes very independent. She also might not trust men due to the fact that the most important man in her life is nonexistent. I have a friend, Felicity, whose father left the family when she was really young. She does not even remember what her father looks or sounds like, which is why I classified him as …show more content…
In an article about fathers leaving affecting his daughters, it says, “As the first man in her life, the young girl's father creates the prototype for her ideal partner consciously and unconsciously. He goes on to be experienced by his pubescent daughter as the mirror on the wall--the ultimate reflection, not only of her fairness but her desirability” (Kavanagh, 2002). A father is the man she loved first and is supposed to be a little girl’s favorite man. Her daddy is the person who is supposed to be there for her from the moment she is born, to the moment he dies. The Perfect Father is the most important man in his daughter’s life and is involved in all her decisions. This may cause the daughter to be indecisive because she relies too much on her father. It may lead to the daughter comparing every man to her father, and some may not measure up. Some girls even look for a man to marry that is exactly like her father. In my opinion, I think that having your father be the role model for a future husband is ideal. A girl is used to the way her father acts and finding someone like him would be an easy transition. The Perfect Father may not always be the ideal father for everyone, but for me it
A girl's communication and relationship with her mother are influential to her development and well-being. Communication between mother and daughter entails sending, receiving and comprehending each other intended message. According to Belgrave (2009), majority of girls report positive relationships with their mothers. Most girls learn from their mothers. This is because mothers teach and socialize with their daughters regarding any facet of her life, including behaving like a female, being a mother, caring for others. More importantly, mothers teach their daughters about sexuality and health (Tamis-Lemonda, Briggs, McClowry, & Snow, 2009). Mothers also teach their daughters how to make a decent living as well as how to achieve career and economic success.
How not having a father figure affected their emotional and phycological well-being. Also, it taught the readers that sometimes having a father does not necessarily, mean they are a father figure, for example Mr. Clutter, he was there for his family and children, but he chose other things to be proud of instead of his children, he felt that his achievements were more important than his children’s
A father figure in a young girl live, is the foundation of those that may come later on. During one of the scene’s Allegra, the protagonist, is discussing with her father her new job position as a psychiatrist in a mental ward. Her father, who is not given a name, could be characterized as an angry, lonely, sad and gloomy man. We are told that his wife was mentally ill and in a hospital. Unfortunately, Allegra has to maneuver with his aggression, verbal abuse and hostility. For instance, Allegra was happily telling her father about her new job position while he was watching television. In this scene, he constantly diverts from the chat by insulting her for wasting her time. In addition, Allegra distractedly mentioned her upcoming visit with her mother, her father harshly tells her to not waste her time with those kind of nonsense. In fact, he encouraged her to use that time to spend it with her boyfriend Bobby. Allegra’s father perception of Bobby is of a one in a million winning lottery ticket thus, she needs to devote all her time to the relationship. Eventually, her father’s patience ran out, he gets annoyed
What is a fathers “responsibility”? Is it to nurture, or is it to provide, maybe even he could do both? In the novel Your Fathers, Where Are They, and the Prophets, Do They Live Forever? Dave Eggers, describes trivial emotional and mental repercussions that occur when there is an absence of a father figure. Sons and daughters alike, any disconnection with a meaningful individual, supposedly relatable in blood, would bring question and concern. A fathers’ relationship and support can be beneficial to any child’s growth. Giving children a solid basis of what kinds of responsibilities go along with being an adult and showing them compassion individualism and what it means to “be a man” is important.
They have a hard time finding who they are as a person. Adolescence is a period of time where kids are putting into circumstance that are hard to understand until they go through them hardship themselves. In “Saplings in the Storm” girls were analyzed to give better understanding of girl’s emotion when they are going through adolescence. Stated in the article, “In early adolescence, studies show that girls’ IQ scores drop and their resiliency and optimism and become less curious and inclined to take risks. They lose their assertive, energetic and “tomboyish” personalities and come more deferential, self- critical and depressed” (19). Girls try to fit the social stands of being a “girl” and in the end they bring themselves down mentally. Adults don’t understand the social stand because they aren’t completely the same anymore. In today’s society girls have to grow up so fast. Girls start wearing makeup at a young age, start wearing scandalize clothes, and have sexual encounters early. Having to go through all these mild stones may make it hard to be themselves and have
I spent the majority of my life being raised by a single mother due to my parents’ divorce. Because of my parents’ divorce, my mother stated firmly that I had changed and became a difficult child. I remember rebelling, suffering with low self-esteem and self-worth and blaming myself for the absence of my father. It was not until I was well into womanhood that I found peace within myself, as well as with my nonresidential father. Through the preparation for this study, I have a better understanding of the external and internal factors that can and will affect the father-daughter relationship.
Sometimes, she looks and me and I just become a puddle.” (Page 193). A father/daughter relationship is important for self-esteem, self-image, and relationships for the daughter later in life.
Furthermore, in 2007 a research was administered by Kathleen Gerson, writer of the American Prospect, based on the question of unsuccessful relationships as a result of poor nurturing through their childhood. She states that “young workers today grew up in rapidly changing times: They watched women march into the workplace and adults develop a wide range of alternatives to traditional marriage.” In other words, Gerson is explaining that due to the change in families, many children can administer a misconception of what relationships are composed of, concluding why their relationships are different than previous generations. This generation grew up in a completely different aspect when women’s rights were already given and male dominance was slowly vanishing. However, since this was a social time change for many, gender roles in the relationships differentiated between families, some decided to remain in traditional-like relationships, while others went to have their own directed relationships but because divorce was no longer unacceptable, many ended in divorce. Having parents as idols and creating their own perspective on relationships, children learned a lot from simple observations. For example as children grow up living with parents in an unhealthy relationship, as they reach a stage to date, they will initiate that all relationships are similar and will believe that-that is the correct way to behave in their own relationship since it’s what they were accustomed to. This
As humans, relationships with people make up a large piece of the puzzle about who we are, how others see us, and what kind of a person we want to be. In a way, humans are like computers, programmed to form close connections with people so we can learn from each other, grow, find comfort and confide in one another, therefore leading us to live a more meaningful life. The media portray the teenage years as the time of learning how to handle the different relationships in our life. A teen’s relationships with their parents, their teacher/mentor and their friends tend to change significantly over the years. One of the most complicated relationships a teenager struggles with is the relationship they have with their parents.
Amanda’s problems stem from her parents' inability to accept her sexuality and Mandy’s from her parents’ discovery of her sexual activity. Both of these issues cause tensions of the child-parent relationship. In adolescence, teens tend to spend more time with their peers and can find support and loyalty from friends. This quality and the strains on child-parent relationships accounts for the decreased amount of time spent with parents and increased amount of time spent with friends in
Since a mother and father are one of the first people to influence who their child will become, their influence plays a major role on their child’s life. From Emily Grierson’s birth to death, her father believed that no one was worthy enough to be with his daughter, rather it be a friend or potential partner. Her father over and over again would
A father and son relationship is very important. It is the foundation for boys to become men. The article, “Why the Father Wound Matter: Consequences for Male Mental Health and the Father-Son Relationship”, by Eric D. Miller explains the concept of a father wound that can manifest in males due to a father neglecting or abusing them. Miller stresses that by becoming fathers’, men can overcome father wounds. He touches upon the idea of masculinity, and how it can be a factor to why there is sometimes a distant relationship between a father and a son. The “A Father’s Call: Father-Son Relationship Survival of Critical Life Transitions”, by Ivory Achebe Toldson and Ivory Lee Toldson explains the relationship between a father and a son from adolescent into adulthood. Lee who was the father describes his struggles through a divorce and how he stayed connected to his son no matter what occurred. Lee’s son Achehbe is also featured in the article and expresses the rough childhood he went through without his father being directly in his life. Together these two articles show that a father is essential to the raising of a boy because without one many form father wounds along with emotional problems.
If a girl has a distant, but not uncaring relationship with her father, due either to unintentional things such as social factors or
Psychologically, a girl’s relationship with her father can play a major role in who she is attracted to. For instance, if a girl was treated right by her father and was also loved by him, she will most likely be attracted to guys her age. If she was abused, neglected or not treated as a daughter she will be attracted to older men, whom she can use to replace her father figure. Also, how a mother deals with her daughter's father being gone can also impact the
In conclusion a father is a significant figure in a daughter’s life. In which he should influence, encourage, and empower their daughters. In the poem My Father in the Navy, Cofer shows her father positive relationship influences her life. In contrast the poem Daddy, Plath shows disastrous relationship negatively impact her life. Both of these poems examine the convoluting relationship between fathers and