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Finding Myself

Decent Essays
Finding Myself People think it’s so easy to change. They think it’s so easy, but it isn’t. Sure, things don’t always stay the same. You get a new couch, boys come and go, you gain a new scar, discover a new song, or you find a new passion. But in the end you’re still just you. Always spinning and turning in awkward beautiful shapes like a ballerina on a floor, spinning and spinning only to come back to the same position. A conflict I’ve always had to face a lot in my life is myself. I’ve always had a problem with accepting myself for who I am, what I’ve done, and what I can become. Self-esteem was my greatest issue. From the time I was in fourth grade I didn’t fit in. I probably didn’t fit in before that either but I noticed myself…show more content…
It was a long hard process and it sent me home some days with the end result of an anxiety attack. Those were never fun. Sometimes I wanted to just quit my job and go back to my comfortable shell where I didn’t have to see people and talk to them. But I couldn’t do that. Not when I knew so many people counted on me out there to do a job that I signed up for. So I pushed on. I smiled at everyone I saw. I went up to people and started a conversation and actually made friends. I was still cautious but I eventually got out of that and now I feel as if I can go up to people and talk to them without a care in the world about anything. I went places with people, hung out with friends, and finally felt better about myself; I was happy. It took a little over three months to get myself to where I dreamed of being and to where I liked myself. So I believe that, getting that job has changed me a lot and was the best decision I’ve ever made. I had the best summer in my entire life and I couldn’t be more proud of myself for facing my problems head on instead of dwelling on my inner demons and letting them win. It changed me for the better and I never feel melancholy anymore. Self-esteem is a hard thing to conquer, especially when you’ve been let down a lot. All you have to do is smile and say to yourself, “I know this, I can do this, I can figure this out!” And you’ll soon be the best you can be. I
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