Managing and Resolving Conflicts in a relationship
Sonia Pabon
Kaplan Institute
Interpersonal Communication
Mr. Muliken
November 26, 2012
The topic that I have chosen to discuss throughout this paper is Managing and Resolving Conflicts in a Relationship. This topic is very important to me simply because, I personally see a lot of relationships failing, including some of mines due to lack of resolving and managing conflicts correctly. By the end of this paper I hope that I have helped the reader understand and eliminate any conflicts that confront their everyday lives. Many relationships and about fifty-five percent of marriages end because of unresolved conflicts. Most of the time these relationships fail because people forget
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Conflict need not be catastrophic or personal conflicts are simply part of being human. Deal with issues as they arise, avoiding conflict makes situations worse. Time does not resolve matters instead it decreases the chance of a positive outcome. Attempt to understand the other person's point of view because dismissing the other's views, assigning blame, and exclusive focus on your own perspective are all counterproductive. Do not judge emotions, no one's feelings are more or less “right” than the other. Emotions reflect a valid perspective of an individual even if you don't understand it; acknowledge the other person's reaction as important. Focus on the behavior, situation or problem area without attacking the person involved. Do not assume your values or beliefs are “right”, they reflect a view of the world from your unique perspective. Respecting another's viewpoint as equally valuable opens an opportunity for learning and growth (Lifetips moving up in life, 2000). Handling conflict is a skill which can be learned. It requires practice, discipline and self-control. In the midst of conflict, most people forget the overall goal in addressing the conflict: Having your partner understand your feelings and resolving the disagreement. The more a couple can keep this goal in mind the less likely either will engage in criticism, yelling or name-calling. These behaviors only fuel the conflict (Managing Conflict in Your Relationship,
Every couple argues. Some couples argue to a greater extent, other couples argue less so. Couples can argue about parenting, money, trust, jealousy, allocating time, drinking or drugs, and so much more. Arguable topics can then even be heighted from stress, depression, lack of support, and poor coping styles and strategies. Overall, marital conflict is a huge piece in
I will inform others that fighting is a normal part of relationships and it is good to negotiate a solution. Often fights are drawn out over a course of time, when the important words are often stated at the beginning. I will highlight that negotiation happens in multiple facets of life as one is trying to get a raise or when one is trying to buy a car. Individuals should learn to practice negotiation and use some of the points made above, such as going to the other person side and watching their conversation from a audience point of view. I will use these tactics as I grow my own family and as I engage with my parents and friends
Conflict is an important problem that everyone experiences sometime in their life. Conflict can take many forms and can appear in many places. This is why it is extremely important that people are able to respond to conflict they face. There are many ways to respond to a conflict no matter what it is. Every way can be practiced and used when needed to but some ways to respond to conflict are better and more effective than others. The three best ways to respond to conflict are having a positive attitude, trying to get help, and distancing yourself from the conflict.
Conflict is everywhere we go, at home, school, church in the community and especially at work. How we decide to handle the conflict at hand will determine whether we strengthen the relationship or break it up. Each situation can be dealt with in a way that can bring healing instead of animosity and further pain. Most of the time conflict is looked at as a negative experience that most people refuse to be a part of because of their own lack of conflict management skills; but if both parties are willing to sit down and discuss the issue, there is a possibility of a positive
Communication and collaboration are two very useful things arguing or not. It is important to communicate in situations because, without talking correctly, the argument will never end. The University of Rochester says, “The constructive ways of approaching conflict are compromise and collaboration” (Kopecky). Also, In conflict resolution skills the author says,“Emotional awareness—the consciousness of your moment-to-moment emotional experience—and the ability to manage all of your feelings appropriately is the basis of a communication process that can resolve conflict” (Sega). This means that you have to be mentally ready to prepare for what you have to say which also goes along with staying calm and positive. Communication can greatly impact conflicts.
I think that conflicts that are resolved with equal effort and commitment tend to help relationships grow stronger and last longer. For example, if my boyfriend and I got into an argument and equally communicated with one another and resolved the issue as soon as possible, this would result in a growth in our relationship. Now if my boyfriend and I got into an argument and refused to talk about and work out the problem, this would result in bigger problems and larger decisions need to be made regarding the relationship itself. Conflicts are not always classified as bad conflicts. If conflicts are constantly occurring throughout a relationship and there is not equal effort being put in on both sides of the relationship to resolve these issues, then this is no longer improving or building a relationship. This is when I believe that the two need to figure out if their relationship is worth their while. Bad conflicts are those that are not dealt with equally between the two involved and their intentions are not to overcome and build a stronger relationship. Good conflicts are those that are worked out equally and help build the relationship as time moves on. The chapter provides ways to approach a conflict and how to handle it. There are five ways people generally handle conflicts: avoidance, accommodation, competition, reactivity, or
Ranging from small quarrels between a couple to a full blown war, conflicts can have many different levels and can have massive impacts. That is why it is necessary need to evaluate the dispute at hand and understand the individual the need to keep one's values in place throughout finding resolution in the
As long as people have gotten romantically involved with one another, there has been conflict within those relationships. Some people argue that conflict is bad for the relationship and will ultimately lead to the demise of that relationship. Others argue that the conflict is good for the relationship and will help it to flourish. Conflict can be both positive and negative for a relationship. It can both help and hinder the relationship. No matter what stage the relationship is in and whether or not the relationship is being helped or hurt, conflict is always happening in different contexts. Conflict is also caused by numerous reasons. These reasons include a lack of interpersonal
Conflict is a necessary part of human nature; it is not something that we can avoid. Many different factors are cataclysmic towards conflict. Goals, personalities, lack of resources, communication skills, and character values are always conflict can come about. Personality-wise, I find myself to be mostly “The Relational Person” and “ The Thinker/Analyzer”. These two personality types have a gargantuous effect on my conflict management skills in many ways. As conflict is a reality of any relationships, it is important to know the strengths and growth areas of yourself.
Occasionally we will go to battle with our loved ones – it’s a fact of life. The need to manage conflicts is vital to keeping a healthy relationship. For me, that concept is difficult. I can make an analogy that conflicts are fire and rather putting the fire out with water, I add fuel. There are 4 concepts hurting my marriage; competitive conflict, schismogenesis, psychodynamic theory, and misplaced conflicts. I will begin with a past conflict that took place a few nights ago.
Everybody will face conflict at some point in their life and most people face it daily. Conflict can make you stronger if you continue pushing forward through it. Most successful people have used their conflict to their benefit. There is also an obvious downside to conflict. If you don’t know how to handle conflict it could push you past your breaking point or cause you to quit on something. This isn’t how you should use conflict. Conflict is what you make it, so make it beneficial.
According to the “Strategies for Handling Conflict” survey, I have a normal ability to handle conflict, and I employ many of the different strategies there are to combating problems. However, there are some that I use more than others. I try not to avoid conflict because I feel that this often times can create even more conflict. There are times when I am too assertive, and I can be hesitant to bring in outsiders, even though this can be a very effective way to resolve conflict. I’ve also learned that sometimes the hardest part in reaching functional outcomes is recognizing when there is conflict, and deciding on what the best approach is to solving the issue. After taking this class, I will have much more tools to step back from conflict and look at it with a more informed lens. I will know all of the major ways in which conflict can be handled, and I will be able to assess which one will fit the conflict at
Finally, the chapter discusses conflict and how to resolve it. Keeping anger under control is of utmost importance. The writers give a few time honored tips for doing this, like relaxation techniques or physical exercise. The book suggests that conflict should be truly resolved, and that our goal should not be just to keep peace. By keeping to the facts, being assertive, and non-judgmental, conflict can be handled in a way that fosters the growth of quality in relationships.
Conflict and conflict management both play pivotal roles in all relationships, whether they are between friends, family, lovers, or coworkers. However, while most relationships have an abundance of conflict, the amount of properly implemented conflict management in all relationships is relatively low. This is especially surprising when you consider the sheer amount of research and counseling directed at managing conflict in constructive ways. Though the aforementioned services and research are of extremely high quality, the people who would benefit from them the most are either entirely unaware of their existence, associate them a negative stigma, or simply don 't have strong conflict management skills. I want to advocate the effectiveness of counseling programs available to help people in relationships resolve conflicts in a positive way, as well as explain some basic aspects of conflict management in a simple, easy to understand text.
Conflicts which lead to unresolved issues can influence the quality of the marriage. Although several research was made on marital relationships, the factors which influence the arising of continuous conflicts are still not clear. Unresolved issues are problems which are continuously brought up in a marriage. However, marital conflicts are not the only source of unresolved issues in a relationship. Unresolved conflicts within the marriage can affect the longevity and quality of the marriage, but personal background and individual trauma contribute to marital problems more often than conflicts within the marriage. In fact, marital conflicts are usually started because of personal unresolved issues. If a person develops a behavioral property