One more hour left.
It was easy to become bored on a plane, especially when you’re stuck on it for Twelve hours, and after those twelve hours, I would be finding myself in Oregon, a long way from home.
Well, my old one.
It occurred to me that being a long way from home quickly builds up on you, knowing that wherever you go you’re known as an outsider, a twelve hour freezing cold oceans long way outsider. Knowing that the cold weathers of England would be replaced with the scorching hot weathers of America. Knowing that my accent will be out of place. Knowing the difference between America and England. Knowing that they have Presidents and not Kings or Queens.
Knowing that thinking about this too much will make my head explode.
In my
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Like my brain was stopping me from remembering. Like there was something I wasn’t supposed to remember.
And every time that happened, I would give up trying.
So that’s what I did, I gave up. I had nothing else to think about, except the one thing I didn’t want to think about in the first place. About me trying to fit in.
“Margo?” My mother called my name who was sitting next to me. And I’m happy she did, hopefully she could take my mind off things.
“Yeah?”
“Still nervous about leaving home?”
Or maybe not…
“What’d you think?” My voice gave my whole mood away.
“Margo, it’s ok to be nervous. Honestly, I’m a little nervous myself.”
Caroline was my mother’s name. If I could call her that.
I knew back then in that so called care home that no one would be like my parents were. Enter Caroline. Who at first was as nervous as me the first time we met. She knew being a mother was a hard job, especially when there was no partner to help her. Caroline, in some respects, was like me. We both loved art, we both got easily moody, we both knew very little about other countries, both hated maths, both liked to read, both liked wearing dark colours.
In short, Caroline was a clone of me, just twenty years older.
But she was a clone with faults.
Caroline unlike me easily panicked about the smallest of things, it was something I
* Forgetfulness, maybe forgetting names of people that you have been in contact with every day, or forgetting what you did just hours or days ago.
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Having nightmares, vivid memories, or flashbacks of the event that make you feel like it’s happening all over again
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