“I” versus “You” In “The 60-Second Shrink” by Arnold Lazarus, the author explores over 100 different strategies designed to help readers handle a variety of life issues. Lazarus discusses strategies for anything from building successful relationships, weight management, to handling stress and anxiety disorders. More interestingly, the author discusses strategies to help the reader learn how to communicate with other individuals. Lazarus suggests that if the reader can learn to communicate more effectively with others, then they are more likely to have a positive experience or outcome. The Strategy I chose to examine a strategy that helps create effective communication between individuals. The strategy, number 57 in the book, is called “I-Statements” and it emphasizes that how you say something is just as important as what you are saying (Lazarus,1997, p.76). The aim of this strategy is to reduce tension and arguments by focusing on using “I-Statements” rather than “You-Statements.” A You-Statement is directed towards the listener, and implies that they have done something wrong or are …show more content…
This emphasis on communication is most closely related to the Family Systems Perspective. This perspective’s goal is aimed towards “[changing] the patterns of relationships that are not working well and helping [to create] new ways of interacting” (Corey, 2016, p. 209). The Family Systems Perspective works to change how individuals communicate with each other within a relationship, to create a more productive environment (Corey, 2016, p. 209). It uses effective communication to resolve ongoing issues between individuals, in ways similar to the I-Statement strategy. Both the Family Systems Perspective and the I-Statement avoid the placement of blame onto individuals, and focus on communicating feelings rather than
In society today, we encounter various types of interpersonal communication. We all must understand the balance and the outcomes communication provides, nonetheless, helps us improve in our own relationships. In David Russell's’ film, “ Silver Linings Playbook” the main character, Pat, is trying to rebuild his life and his marriage, all while having a mental disorder. By using the film and my own daily interactions in my life, I will be using terms and concepts to be able to analyze communication styles that are effective and ineffective.
In the article, “Communication: Its Blocking and Its Facilitation” by Carl R, Rogers, a psychotherapist who wrote a book without being a teacher of writing, asserted that psychotherapy will create guidance towards failures of communication and can improve communication between people. Rogers declared that the foremost barrier to be beneficial towards the interpersonal communication is one examining from their perspective. But the barrier can be eliminated if the people stop judging other people’s ideas , opinions without analyzing the other person’s point of view meaning putting themselves in a person 's situation. In fact, he briefly acknowledges the complication of communication towards the people but also provides diverse ways to improve our communication, mainly when contributors are known to support their role. Also, valor is known to be listening compassionately, meaning one extensive towards the risks of changing. In this issue, Rogers elucidates the indifference towards caring about the third party that can improve the adversary achieving mutual understanding by encouraging them as partners to resolve problems, instead of being foes and holding a grudge. Moreover, as social scientist, there is
In this reading, John Stewart discusses how the “Two of the Most Important Words” can impact one’s communication. Stewart starts off by readdressing some concepts that were mentioned in the being of chapter two. He reminds the readers that communication is “the continuous, complex, collaborative process of verbal and nonverbal meaning making” (Stewart, 141). Stewart reiterates this definition to help readers understand how the “two most important words” tie into it. According to Stewart, the words “and” and “next” are effective ways to express solutions and meaning in communication.
Our model will educate you on the role of the family and various communication styles that are reflective of the human validation process. Our model is that the communication style of the family is reflective of the level of worth if the members in the family will learn to be honest and genuine with one another. Understanding that as a
From the “You and I” handout and class discussion, I have learned that using “I” statements to present your concerns to another person helps direct a conversation in a more productive way. An “I” statement allows for the presentation of your personal feelings so that when you address your concerns, you are not directly blaming another person. It is important to express how you personally feel about what someone else is doing, so voicing the specific emotion you have related to the incident is important as it gives the other person an idea of the effects of their actions (You and
Applying the family systems theory to any interdependent unit can prove beneficial when analyzing behavior. They systems theory consists of interdependence, wholeness, patterns, punctuation, openness, complex relationships and equifinality. For the purpose of my paper I will be focusing on interdependence, punctuation and equifinality. According to the research of Phillip and Carolyn Cowan in 1997, although an individual’s behavior may often be perceived as irrational when taken out of context, considering the interdependent system in which they function can reveal reason (Galvin, Bylund, & Brommel, 2004). Interdependence within a family is inevitable as the behaviors of one member in turn always affect the behaviors of another. Communication is the glue of a functional family system. However, even upon communicating within the family misunderstanding can occur.
Parenting is a very complex process that involves many factors both internal and external. Parenting and the components involved in it are varied and wide reaching. There isn't one successful method to parenting or having a positive experience. However, there are many underlying aspects that are universal in the pursuit of a successful parenting experience. Communication is one of those underlying factors. Without question, proper communication is essential to successful parenting and the development of children. Without proper communication, there would be no feedback mechanism in which to properly coach and change negative behaviors. There would also be no means of successfully adapting to change with the child and the parents themselves. As such, communication provides the solid foundation by which parenting can become successful and fulfilling.
Murray Bowen’s family systems theory is a theory of human behavior that looks at the family as an expressive unit and uses systems thinking to describe the multiple interactions in the element. Bowen, a family therapist, focused on how family members could maintain a healthy balance between being overly involved in each other’s lives and having too much detachment from each other. He focused on four ways of helping families develop individual identities for each member while maintaining a sense of closeness and togetherness with their families. Spousal relationships, de-triangulation, emotional systems, and differentiation are emphasized. Bowen paid attention to the spousal relationship and the definition and clarification of the couple's relationship.
Taking this class has helped me learn and grow in many ways within my relationships. Taking this class, I am now aware that changing distorted or absolute self-concept can be a good thing, common tendencies in perception also leads to attribution errors more often than we realize, appreciating the value of empathy when understanding and enhancing my relationships, knowing and fully understanding the use of relational stages, how to manage dialectical tensions efficiently, and how family communication patterns affect children’s future relationships. Family communication patterns and the types of ineffective listening really sparked my interest. While reading about family communication I found the whole chapter interesting because it is most
Members in a family are part of an organization, which could be a functional one or a dysfunctional one based on the way the organization is structured. I think communication in the family is a key aspect in order to make the organization run properly. There’s some families in which one member of the group decided every decision for each family member, which I think is very unhealthy for the organization. For example, you should be a doctor because I think it’s best for you, while the child has no skills in order to be successful in the medical field. They think they know what’s best for each individual without having the knowledge to know what that individual desires or wants are. It’s quite frustrating to know that none of your group members
This theory has been subject to many articles and studies in the communication and social departments. Indeed, studying this theory can help us understanding human relations in interpersonal communication. Each of us has been one day confronted to uncertainty, whereas in initial encounters, or moving to a new a new place, or beginning a new work.
The narrative paradigm created by Walter Fisher states that, “[it is] a theoretical framework that views narratives as the basis of all human communication” (Griffin, Ledbetter, & Sparks, 2015, p. 307). In short, humans communicate with one another through the stories that they tell; humans are storytellers. Another theory that is important to touch upon is family systems theory. This theory explains, “family systems theory provides us with increased knowledge about what factors may influence a family’s (and child’s) quality of life, membership, and personal sense of competence”
After reviewing all the core constructs of systems theory and communication theory at the end of the term, I found they have inalienable connections. System is the basic background of all the concepts. Compared with traditional family therapy, which has had a primary focus on interactions among family members, quality of family relationship, various aspects of family development and functioning, however, systemic therapy emphasizes the role of wider systems
Communication is influential to our society; each individual in our society communication styles varies due to the different aspects we follow. Communication justifies the logic behind the way you carry out verbal communication, written communication, and non-verbal communication. Significantly, communication impacts how we mutually solve problems without conflict. Withal, the Introduction to Communication 101-003 course is an important class because it constructs cooperation, social communication, and organization. The three reasons why this course is valued are as followed: it inspires you to voice the concepts you believe in, the knowledge obtained in the class will shape how individuals interact with one another, and the course provides a platform to benefit relationships, emotional development, and social development. These concepts have shaped our perspective on how we communicate with individuals within our diverse nation. Furthermore, my level of communication has altered throughout this class. I think about how my thoughts will affect individuals before I verbally express gratitude about a situation. I acknowledged how Models of Communication, Perception, Listening, Verbal Communication and Non-verbal communication has impacted our daily lives. Although we spent 6 long weeks expressing our feeling in these journal entries; however, they have given us a clear understanding about our communication abilities. Withal, the great amount of information in these chapters
“It is my impression effectives interpersonal verbal communication depends on prior effort interpersonal verbal communication.” (Simon 204 paragraph 3)