After reading the essays “The Naked Citadel” and selections from “Hard To Get” by Susan Faludi and Leslie Bell, readers are presented with the various hardships young adults of both sexes face. While Faludi’s essay focuses on men and their hardships in a controlled environment like the Citadel to simulate how a “real man” should live in the real world, Bell’s essay focuses on women out in said real world and the different hardships they have to endure due to society’s standards of conduct. Both texts speak about sexuality, gender identity and expression and how they affect how one’s life will unfold depending on how different any of the three terms mentioned are from society’s traditionally accepted standards. By attempting to be a more original individual with strong characteristics and a unique personality, one should be aware that there will be challenges ahead for them, for people fear what they do not know. Society tends to ostracize and at times retaliate against those who choose to disregard gender roles. In addition, society prevents men and women from actualizing their potentials and achieving self-fulfillment by enforcing a strict set of gender norms. These gender norms leave individuals devoid of their humanity by demanding that they meet the extremes of many behavioral and sexual spectrums. Men are expected to act masculine, stoic, insensitive, etc. while women are expected to be conservative, feminine, charming, etc. without exception. With no in-between,
The women author Leslie Bell interviews in Selections from Hard to Get: Twenty-Something Women and the Paradox of Sexual Freedom share their stories of how they found sexual freedom by not submitting to their environments beliefs. Bell describes to the reader the quandaries of these women who decided to reject the principles of their society and how they chose to deal with the tension it causes. Society leads people to the decisions they choose, which is why it causes conflict between its codes and the concept of individualism. In reaction to this conflict, each of Bell’s patients, mentioned in the passage, acted defensively in a way they felt was best to achieve their own freedom.
I appreciate the author’s attempt to fully submerse herself back into an adolescent mindset in order to understand the complex issues of masculinity, sexuality and gender
in our society we are given strict guidlines of what a man and a femal should behave like. no matter where we go we are first judged by our gender and secoundly our race. some people believe that sexual confusion or gender role confusion are diorders that people have from birth, which is true, but at times these behaviors come from tramatic or negative experiances. for a child or indivual person to become confused aboul there sexual role in society they experiencesome form or belittle ment based on their divergent behavior toward the strict gudlines of sexuality. our society has stressed out the idea that the ideal girl should not be powerful, aggressive or strong, and the ideal boys should not have a petite physique, play with dolls or engage
In the Naked Citadel, the boy’s identity is essentially being performed. They are distinguished as superior non-feminine men, while behind the scenes they are typically performing feminine acts. Violently harassing the young knobs, showering together, and making their beds together was where they could show their true selves. Faludi mentions how “the result is ruthless intimacy, in which physical abuse stands in for physical affection, and every display of affection must be counterbalanced by a display of sadism”(Faludi, 100). The boys become so infatuated with showing their feminine side that when they snap back to reality they realize it is a sign of weakness and use anger to feel relief. The Cadets act like they are on a stage playing a role in a play much like the Treehouse where men dress up as Drag Queens. Both identities are being performed, which means while playing a role you are still truly yourself. This is also seen in Biographies of Hegemony, while Princeton and Harvard students are getting recruited, they put on this elite, smart act of attraction to be a part of this high institution of Wall Street. It is claimed that “the most distinguishing features of investment banking are their smartness and exclusivity” (Ho, 166). This shows how by putting themselves in a different
Preamble: It is at this point in American History that the new generations are growing and having their eyes pried open to the strict chains of the world around them. They are realizing how few opportunities the are given to express themselves, having been bound by social constructs and rigid expectations created by society at large. It is crucial that the children of the future can safely be themselves without the ridiculous “guidelines” that cage us in; we calls these gender normalities.
“Gender is not passively scripted on the body, and neither is it determined by nature, language, the symbolic, or the overwhelming history of patriarchy. Gender is what we put on, invariably, under constraint, daily and incessantly, with anxiety and pleasure…” (Rivkin pg. 910). Society on the other hand creates “laws” for each one of us to follow. These “laws” prohibit an individual from stepping outside of their designated “gender role”. The minute an individual is born, their body is inscribed with gender norms whether the person likes it or not. For example, if you are born female you must act like how society views a female. You must be elegant and graceful doing things women are supposed to do like dancing and doing house chores. As for men, they are given the roles to be more masculine, like working on cars, carpentry, basketball, etc. Social sanctions and taboos are the result when an individual violates their social norms. “As a strategy of survival, gender is a performance with punitive consequences” (Rivkin pg. 900). This means that society will be the one to judge and punish you for not following the norms. Performing the act the way an individual wants to is viewed as resistance, therefore it is looked down upon by the society.
Upon birth, people are influenced to categorize and discriminate others based on their gender, and sexuality. The community infants live in cultivate them into creating a sense of what is considered normal, and accepted. This ideology places limitations on their mind, discouraging them from breaking away from the social norm, because change is not easily accepted in a community. Matt Shepard was a homosexual who inhabited a town where homosexuality was uniformly acceptable, while Shannon Faulkner is a woman who was despised for changing tradition, and society did not act kindly towards them, despite stating they were gentlemen-like, and friendly. In Susan Faludi’s article, The Naked Citadel, and Beth Loffreda’s article, Selections from Losing
The lives of men and women have changed over the course of the century, including the society and the roles they play in the society. Women are now more self-confident and more aware of what they want, whether it is in education, work, romance, and ultimately their future. As a result, women are criticized and end up with labels such as being “crude” or “too aggressive,”. Society’s expectations of women have always been to remain submissive to men and to be stay at home house wives.
Society confronts women with a myriad of obstacles. From reproductive rights to suffrage, it has been an uphill battle to escape objectification and marginalization. When women are viewed as sexual objects or matronly figures, there is no hope of progress. This is in part by the idea of conformity. Women who confront this head on have the potential for greatness but not without judgement and confrontation. Often times this adversity leads to quitting because of the daunting challenges that always seem to lie ahead. Whether it is not making the same money for the same work or being expected to endure sexual harassment on an everyday basis, it is a cruel world. Production relies off reproduction. Boys would never grow up to be the men of production
According to Christian doctrine: In the Beginning, God created man and woman. In older times, before Christ, women and men were designated roles in the Holy Bible. Men were expected to be the head of the household, while women were expected to be the body. This means that men were to produce for their families while women are to run the family. Now years later, although society has much changed, there is still an unspoken expectation that should be reached by both sexes. Although women and men have fought for things, such as women rights and equality- there is a double standard that exists between the two genders. Some have argued whether the lifestyle of a man versus a woman is harder (Chrisler). In those arguments, both parties have valid points. Many of the points refer to the gender double standard and expectation that both genders are expected to maintain. Many of these “expectations” occur in adolescent years of the individual (Axinn). In Jamaica Kincaid’s short story “Girl” I do believe that society also played a role in the expectations of this mother’s idea of femininity. This story was written in the early 1980’s. Around this time frame, women were coming up in society. They were moving into professional and managerial jobs during this time frame. There was a 27% increase in working women during the 1980s (Bock). Due to gender double standards and the expectations of femininity, it is harder to be a woman than to be a man. I also think that
Authors Ravelli and Webber (2016) define gender as societal differences and features between men and women. Sexuality comes in two dominant forms which are socially constructed, respectively known as hemogenic masculinity and emphasized masculinity. As mentioned earlier hemogenic masculinity is defined as ideal masculinity that men are supposed to follow. For example, in a “North American Culture”, the personality characteristics belonging to a hemogenic individual are aggression, dominance, motivation, and treating women poorly (Ravelli & Webber, 2016). While emphasized femininity is defined as the ideal norm that a woman must conform to a man's commands to meet his needs (Ravelli & Webber, 2016). An example would be a man controlling his wife and the woman simply obeying every command dread upon her, such as controlling where she goes and who she talks to. The two forms of dominant sexualities connect to one another as emphasized femininity is formed when hegemonic masculinity is
As a Sociology major, I am learning to understand both broad and narrow social phenomena, concerns and problems, and in doing so, they integrate the findings of other social science disciplines. One of the many social phenomena’s I have been interested in during my time at Kingston University is discussing sex and gender. Primarily, Judith Butlers ‘performativity’ explains how ‘females’ and ‘males’ gendered roles are performed naturally through a routinely stylized behavior and how gender exist only because it is being acted out and performed. Furthermore, Simone de Beauvoir’s, The Second Sex hugely became an influential book during the second wave feminism, which involved sexuality, family, workplace, reproductive rights, etc. In her book, women are perceived as the “other,” as a default sex. She distinguishes sex and gender and states that gender is gradually acquired. Lastly, I will explore sexuality briefly and Annecka Marshall’s study of the social construction of black female sexuality, and how women control how they are perceived and negotiate their sexual selves.
Bell’s use of the “Paradox of Sexual Freedom” stands out to be one of the most fundamental concepts on how a woman should live her twenties: free from all cultural and social restrictions on sexuality and relationships. For instance, Bell states, “Be assertive, but not aggressive. Be feminine, but not too passive. Be sexually adventurous, but don’t alienate men with your sexual prowess. Be honest and open, but don’t overwhelm someone with too much personal information” (Bell 26). We are told to be a certain way, yet there are always limitations set for us that completely throws us off and makes us doubt ourself about our sexuality and relationships. In fact, Bell’s use of the repetitive word “but” establishes the limitation and extent that women can go up to. Along with stating the “normal standards” of sexual desires, the society also challenges women to maintain the fine line between being assertive and aggressive, feminine and passive, sexually adventurous and sexual prowess. Moreover, Bell also mentions in her text, “Given the discordant nature of these prescriptions, it’s no wonder that the women I interviewed and counsel struggle to square these contradictory messages with their own individual experiences” (Bell 27). As a result, while we are told that we are free to make choices that defines our sexual lives and there is no
David had yet again stolen his sister’s dress but this time, his father was home to witness it. David loved cross dressing and playing kitchen. His father, on the other hand, was a strict ex-military officer. David’s father was a homophobic man who had zero tolerance for ‘gay’ behavior. David’s father believed that, “Cooking is a woman’s job, so men do not belong in the kitchen. If a man does things that are meant for a woman, that man is definitely gay!” Such beliefs of what a man can or cannot do restricts the self-expression of the man. Inadvertently, these beliefs also lead to misogyny. Women are seen as submissive objects to be toyed with. Men treat women as property, in order to appear ‘masculine’, or better yet. Gender identity is a
Boys will be boys. Boys do not cry. Girls should not get dirty. Girls play with dolls. These are just a few of the common misconceptions of gender commonly heard in our society. Beginning at a very early age in life, young people are constantly bombarded by messages, some are subtle while others are intentional, but both show a reflection on society’s views of certain expectations dealing with gender. Members of society process these messages and form attitudes regarding what they deem to be appropriate and what is not for both males and females.