This essay isn't about the "perfect" family. This essay is about a successful family, e.g. one that meets most of the needs and goals of its members. A family where everyone is physically safe and emotionally content. To achieve this, let's examine three key factors of a successful family.
The best interests of the children. No one thinks about divorce on their wedding day, except pre-nuptial lawyers. You and your mate promise to communicate well and work through problems based upon your love and commitment for each other. Then children come along, and it seems as if your family life is "set." Ten years later, you and your partner accept you no longer want to stay together for numerous reasons. What about the children? Should you stay
…show more content…
Regardless of your decision to stay together or separate, the most crucial thing that is in the best interests of the children is that you keep your relationship respectful and dignified.
Learn how to fight with your partner. Yes, that’s right; you need to learn how to have a constructive argument with your spouse or partner, instead of falling into the trap of having endless destructive arguments. Although you might think that the goal in a successful family is to avoid fights altogether, this is simply not possible. Some squabbles and disagreements can actually healthy in a family; they clear the air and resolve underlying resentments. There is a right way and a wrong way to fight; the important thing is how you fight. Here’s some tips about fair and constructive fighting: (1) Fight fair. Name-calling is for children; adults must do better. (2) Get to the point and stick with the point. Argue about one thing that’s bothering you without bringing up everything that you disagree about from the beginning of your relationship! Don’t digress; tell your partner what is bothering you, and why. (3) Take breaks. Time yourselves out when you feel that the fight is turning ugly and getting out of control. This keeps tempers in check and gives you and your partner time to get your thoughts together. (4) Give each other a chance to respond to your statements. A fight shouldn’t be a monologue, but a two-way conversation. Women tend to talk
you will feel satisfied about choosing the right right decision for the sake of your children and
Divorce is viewed differently by many people. Sometimes this is due to experiences, what others have said, or looking at studies that are not always accurate. However, not everyone can have the same views about marriage ending in divorce. In the article, “No Easy Answers: Why the Popular View of Divorce Is Wrong” by Constance Ahrons she shows her view on divorce. Ahrons believes that divorce does not have long-lasting damaging effects on children (65). Divorce can affect children in the family but the way the decisions are made is what will change the way the kids are influenced.
The 1950’s were a decade of growth and expansion. Growth of the middle class, expansion of religion and a growing economy kept Americans on the move- literally. Families were moving from the cities and into the suburbs. “This massive shift in population from the central city was accompanied by a baby boom that started during World War II. Young married couples began to have three, four, or even five children (compared with only one or two children in American families during the 1930’s) (The American Story, pg. 729). This style of living began making the immediate
Divorce is a very critical and sensitive issue for any couple that has planned for the separation. The issue becomes more complicated if they have children, whose custody becomes a big question to be resolved.
It is expected that in dealing with divorce, there will be numerous questions and uncertainties involved. It is our objective to eliminate the confusions in order for you to forge ahead with confidence and plan for a better future.
It’s best if the kids aren’t around if there is going to be an argument. Many children of divorced parents already feel as if their world is spinning out of control. Even after the divorce is final and the aftermath calms down, many hold onto vague feelings of insecurity. Seeing their parents “out of control” will only lend credence to these fears. Never criticize the child’s other parent in front them as it is also frightening for children to view someone they depend on as weak or insufficient. Then there’s the issue of divided loyalties that can become a real problem for children who are not yet equipped to deal with the complexities of the
Choosing to separate from your spouse is a strong decision. You've taken your life into your own hands and chosen to live on your terms. So, pay it forward to your children and let them love their parents on their terms.
Accepting the things you cannot change will free up a lot of your emotional energy that is best used to benefit your kids. It will also release a lot of stress that makes an amicable, working relationship with your ex extremely difficult.
Divorce is becoming all too popular in our society today. When a couple experience tough times or have one too many arguments, they automatically think divorce. Despite its prevalence couples are not prepared for it’s long, drawn out, hurtful process. Divorce does not only hurt the individuals involved, it also affects the children tremendously. While many people don’t think divorce is a bad thing. Hollywood makes divorce look cool and uneventful. When in all reality, it is disruptive. Some people would say that divorce is a lazy way out of a marriage; the cowardly thing to do when a situation presents itself. Divorce is not the only answer to marital problems, in most cases.
Divorce can have a long lasting impact on everyone involved, but most often, it is the children who suffer this dramatic change the most. When a couple decides to divorce, there are considerations that are made during the process, however, most often, the lifelong effects of the divorce on children is underestimated. Children undergo severe psychological, emotional, and mental trauma during a divorce process. This is due to the immense changes of lifestyle and households that can seem overwhelming to a child.
Most divorced couples have tried every option available to work things out and make their marriage work. Nobody enters into marriage with the intent of getting a divorce, but sometimes it is what is best for you and your children. Nobody knows your situation and what is the right thing for your family, so judgments about your divorce are often incorrect.
Couples make the decision to have a divorce after realizing that their marriage is no longer healthy, and in order to restore their happiness they decide to end the marriage. Although the individuals mutually agree that this is the best decision long term it can also lead to an accumulation of negative effects. These negative effects will impact every individual that is associated with the divorce, which can include the parents, children, family members, and friends. The occurrence of a divorce can impact the psychosocial, cognitive, and physical domain of each individual associated, cause various long term effects, and lead to remarriage.
Determining family structure and dynamics as well as defining the family is a complex process. Personally, I come from a very traditional family. Much like the assumptions made by the students in the article Defining Family: Young Adults’ Perceptions of the Parent-Child Bond by Mellisa Holtzman (2008). This is what comes to mind when most people define family; a nuclear family, with married parents, and biological children. However, a family is a complex system and can take on many different forms.
There are different issues that come up in a family that leads to divorce, which affects children. A valid reason is necessary in order to legally divorce a partner or spouse. The process of getting separated is not easy and some couples encounter troubles whilst at it, such as emotional and financial problems.
Any parents thinking of divorce should be court-ordered to watch "Kramer vs. Kramer." If there is even a slight chance of compromise after seeing it, they will stay together rather than inflict their separation upon their children.