The Effects of Low Self Esteem on Children
Aruna Kalicharan
Psychology of Infancy and Childhood (DEP 2000), Section 01
Professor Lissette M. Saavedra
April 24, 2001
What is Low self-esteem?
In most cases, children with low self-esteem feel that the important adults and peers in their lives do not accept them, do not care about them very much, and would not go out of their way to ensure their safety and well-being. Negative self-esteem is related to low self-confidence, insecurity, underachievement, anxiety, depression, acting-out behavior, sleep problems and being a loner (Yarnell, 1999).
During their early years, young children's self-esteem is based largely on their perceptions of how the important adults in their lives
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They are also more likely to be involved in antisocial behavior (Dubow, Edwards, & Ippolito, 1997). Also, they are more likely to do poorly in school (Marsh & Yeung, 1997).
Low self-esteem is formed in childhood as a result of negative situations the child experiences such as having parents consistently take the side of others against the child or having their feelings ignored and discounted. Also, being blamed for the parent's current problem or being threatened with abandonment.
How can we help children develop a healthy sense of self-esteem?
According to LeCrone (2001), security, significance and confidence will help children feel more secure about themselves. For parents, helping their child feel lovable and capable, the
two ingredients of self-esteem are feeling loved and capable. Parents can foster this in many little ways everyday. It is important to the child that the parent listens, takes his or her feelings seriously, and spends time alone with their child. They can also show their respect and support by allowing their child to make decisions, respecting their child's possessions, and expressing love with words and hugs. As children grow older, they begin to discover that they have special talents and interests. Parents can help by providing opportunities for children to experiment with different activities. Children who enjoy
Consistent nurturing and respectful relationship between adults and children brings in great accomplishments. By providing a safe, loving, trusting and encouraging environment, children grow in the direction of their interest builds a strong relationship makes who they are and who they become. According to Kostnenik, Whiren & Soderman, “children who feel supported and valued in their current environment are more likely to do well cognitively and socially and approach new events with hope for
2005 p 342). This fact does not discredit the positive effects children can have, but identifies that there are more costs that prevail. This is known as the parenting paradox (Rizzo, K., Schiffrin, H., & Liss, M. 2012). A 2003 study argues that while children add complexity to an individual’s life, some of those complexities add depth to a person’s life. It states that “caring for others is a primary way in which adults grow psychologically or enhance their self-concept” (Nomaguchi, K., & Milkie, M. 2003 p 358). However, this study found no difference in self-esteem between parents and non-parents. It additionally found that new parents reported a lower level of self-efficacy than non-parents. The study attributed this to the fact that infants take a lot of the parents’ time, which might lead them to believe that they cannot reach their goals (Nomaguchi, K., & Milkie, M.
Low self-esteem is someone’s overall emotional and how they value themselves, it is an evaluation for her or his own worth. Self-esteem is a judgement on yourself in this case low self-esteem is when someone feels that s/he is not worth nothing they feel useless to society. Unfortunately a person could never had low self-esteem but s/he is being bullied from someone else’s and s/he starts feeling useless if it is not treated immediately this can lead to low self-esteem. Low self-esteem can leads to problem in relationships, bad choices on work and in life, low self-esteem doesn’t let you to choose the right decisions you need to make. For example in this house there is a particular elderly who before he entered this house he didn’t have low self-esteem now he is being bullied by his carer he slaps him if he doesn’t want to eat any more resulting to this he now have low self-esteem that he doesn’t want to talk to anyone about it.
Self esteem is defined as how we feel about ourselves.The way that one feels about them self can be positive resulting in high self esteem, or negative resulting in low self esteem. Self esteem evolves throughout a person's life based on their experiences and relationships. The way that one is treated by those closest to them can be a huge factor in determining their level of self esteem. Abuse, excessive criticism, neglect, and lack of support or love can all contribute to a person having low self esteem. Body image, a person's perception of his or her physical appearance, is another factor in self esteem. Those who feel unsatisfied with their physical appearance tend to have low self esteem.
When someone suffers from low self esteem they tend to ignore the positive comments about themselves from people such as close friends and family. They in return become vulnerable to strangers. They think that because a person is family or a friend, they have to compliment them or be nice to them. When someone they don’t know compliments they, they give in to the will of that person. Someone with low self-esteem, in most cases, will believe that whatever happens to them in life is what they deserve.
All children search for attention, love and acceptance through their childhood. If a child doesn’t receive attention, love and acceptance, in which way can they find the trust to be themselves? They will be stuck in an uncertain world, where they have no trust in themselves and difficult to evolve their identity.
School age children self concept has to do with ability to do things, personality traits, judgemnet of others an their capabilities and well as relations to others. School age children self esteem may go down with the first few years of schooling and will later go up. Culture and child raising forces can affect the childs esteem
Through the child’s perspective researchers have found that feelings of not being good enough lead to lack of inner self esteem and confidence. “No means no” was expressed throughout the their childhood. Threats intimidation and/or manipulation were used and made kids feel helpless. “Do as I say, not as I do” was also expressed a lot; resulting in, obedience or in other words they wait for the parents to tell them what to do. The parents lacked empathy for the developmental age, needs, and desires, which causes them to feel unimportant. Many negative emotions were a no no, and so were argumentative points from children’s perspectives; resulting in, thinking for themselves and their feelings are of no importance. Times parents apologized to their offspring were rare, which meant figuring out what’s right and wrong on their own, and the feeling of they can fix things if they only try harder. Lastly support for the kid’s fundamental developmental discovery was not supported, unless parents were able to take credit for it. This resulted in irresponsible kids, impulsive behaviors, and never feeling like they accomplished or deserved the accomplishments they received (Mental Health Newsletter). Threats and manipulation were things some controlling parents used to get their child to obey them, well this is
As children grow and develop during the school-age phase of life, they begin to develop a sense of self-concept. This is when they begin to evaluate themselves and their achievements. They will begin to compare themselves to their peers. According to Edelman, Kudzma, and Mandle (2014), self esteem, self control, and a child’s perception of their body will all influence a child’s overall self-concept. The child begins to understand that he or she is difference from other people, and they will display a new sense of autonomy. The child will develop and demonstrate various behaviors and emotions during this time. They may also over estimate their abilities early on during the school-age phase and it is important to provide them support.
What are some things that have a negative effect on a child’s self-esteem? How are children affected by these factors?
Self esteem thrives in a nurturing enviorment. We will know and believe that we are loveable if, and only if, we are loved and nurtured by our parents.
The emotional causes of low self-esteem are due to the child having insecurities about their appearance and ability. Low self-esteem is associated with emotions by many factors. A child who is abused may suffer from low self-esteem. That child may suffer physical abuse or mental abuse, either way, this is a cause of low self-esteem.
How important is good self-esteem in the development of children: extremely important!! Having good self-esteem is a key component in the healthy development of children and adolescents (Nuttall, 1991). A person with high self-esteem feels like they can accomplish anything they set their minds to, whereas a person with low self-esteem feels that they are unimportant and nothing they do will make a difference (Nuttall, 1991). How a person feels about themselves affects how they will act, this is true in adults and adolescents as well as small children (Nuttall, 1991) There are a myriad of influences that can make a difference in the self-esteem of children today: parents, teachers, friends, and society in general all have an effect on a
When children see their parents involved in a meaningful way, they may benefit from the confidence and self-esteem that comes with feeling secure in their parents’ commitment to their well-being (Col. State).
People’s self-esteem either high or low is shaped by their life experiences. I believe a person’s self-esteem begins to take shape at an early age, with their parents being a major influence. Kind, positive, knowledgeable and caring parents help children create a positive self-image. Parents who do not feel good about themselves or others, sometimes take it out on their childern by belittling them or discouraging them. This leads the child down a path of self-doubt and eventually given the right circumstances a lower self-esteem.