My Father And My Family

My grandmother had always filled my child mind with memories of her kids childhood such as how they were the four musketeers and were just like “The Brady Bunch” I always thought my grandmother was beautiful, kind, Christian woman, who loved her family more than life, but those were lies I soon figured out from my mom and aunt. My grandmother has MS(Multiple Sclerosis) a disease that has taken her ability to work and care for herself and complete everyday tasks. It has progressively gotten worse since I was around five or six so my mom and grandmother decided to have her move in with us and trust me that was like uprooting a tree, but the tree was a 90 pound all skin and bones hunched over old woman from the cramped white house she’d lived in for years. My grandmother had become an onion and with every layer you peeled back you learned more of the truth even if it hurt. I learned what my mom and aunt had gone through as kids and why my grandpa really left this woman I’ve never known.

They say families always are there for you all the time that they are the most important people in your life. In this case, that is true they are, but at the same time friends become more than that which makes them be part of the family. The people that help me accomplish my goals would be my mom, stepfather and my boyfriend.

As a child, my brother Jean and I were not always very close, even though we are fairly close in age. As children, we went to school together and grew up learning the importance of family values, particularly the meaning of “sticking together.” Every day we walked to school together. Before we ventured off to elementary school, our mother would say, “Stick together, and Jean, listen to your big brother!” Even though I was only two years older than Jean, I knew I was responsible if anything bad were to happen to him under my watch. My brother and I were quite daring as children and did not always follow all the rules. Also, Jean was more stubborn than I and did not know when the time for play should stop. I will never forget that one frightful day when the lesson about the value of my family and sticking together changed my life.

It seemed as if a war was happening right in the middle of our kitchen. Seeing the puddles of tears streaming down from my sister and I’s face was undoubtedly heartbreaking for my parents, but it was also heartbreaking for my sister and I to find out our parents were getting a divorce. Their screaming was loud and constant. I wish my walls were soundproof.

Family. That word means everything to me. My parents, both immigrants from India, were raised in relative poverty in their hometown of Bengaluru. They courageously made the decision to leave their own family behind for the sake of a better opportunity for themselves and their children. They sacrificed a lot when I was growing up, as they worked hard to establish their careers. Thankfully, my grandparents were there to help take care of me. Travelling back and forth from India, they would help around the house, cook meals, and even pick me up from school. Their presence played a huge role in my childhood. I was lucky enough to basically grow up with four parents, each of whom instilled in me values that I hold today: hard work, sacrifice, and altruism.

As children we are born into a family in which we are chosen by God to be in. We are placed in a home, community, and an environment that makes us who we are today. Some of us must seek to overcome and grow out of the place we were born in and others are more content with where they were brought up in. As a child I was born in a good home yet fought many battles but it made me the strong soldier I am today.

One of the most severe trials that has ever affected my life was when I lost one of the most important people in my life, my grandmother. She was someone who had a major influence in my life, and for most of it she was very sick, in pain, couldn’t move very well she was pretty brittle in that sense. Before this severe tragedy, It never really came to my mind that someone I love could just disappear like that. During her final week of expected time to live, she was the worst, non responsive, incoherent, and suffering, all we got from her was heavy breaths. Within 1 weeks time we get the call that she had passed and we rushed over, seeing them drag away her corpse ensconced blue duffel bag was probably the hardest thing to witness. October 12th 2015, 5 days from her 90th birthday, she took her last breath. Someone who loved me, took care of me, and watched as I grew up, suddenly was gone.

There are 3 things you never sacrifice: your dignity, your heart, but most important, your family. Trust is a very hard thing for people to earn from me, especially since i only associate myself with my family. My family consists of my mom, dad, sister, my 4 dogs, 4 aunts & uncles, 2 grandma’s & grandpa’s, & 10 cousins (3 are older, the rest are younger). There are really REALLY close friends of my family that i consider to be apart of it. Ever since my brain damage, i’ve cut ties w/ everyone, even today i keep people at arms length. You get betrayed, heartbroken, hurt so many times that you just… shut everyone out. Ever since my brain damage, i’ve been really paranoid, but rightfully so. I’ve got a lot of enemies, it gets exhausting to keep up with them all. Nobody likes being hurt by the people you call your friends, especially me. Ever since then & even to date back all the way to when i was 11 years old, i always tried to make myself look strong. By doing this, i locked my own heart in a suit of armor, so that it would never break ever again. It may sound like i’m going to end this by saying i’ve gotten better at trusting people, that i’m happier & able to hold onto friends easier but unfortuately that hasn’t happened yet. The only way it can happen is if i let it happen, & that’s not happening any time soon.

My family may not be the tightest, or richest, but my parents love me and would do anything for me. My parents made me who I am, my mom told me to be humble and never judge a person because who knows what that person has been through. On the other hand there's my dad, who taught me a lot about the real world, and life is not as easy as I thought and you'll need money to have a decent life, so stay in school, because school the only way for a better life. My oldest brother probably taught me the most though. He tells me about sports and who got traded or hurt, he tells me about politics. They are the reason I am me. After all, if I was raised by my uncle, I think I wouldn't even think about going to college, I would prolly live in Norwood all my life following in his footsteps, but I wasn't, I was raised by two supporting parents, who wants me to have a better life than them and will make sure I will. My family made me who I am, with my dad lectures about me needing to work for what I want, to my mom's kindness and showing me how to treat others no matter who they are.

“Families are the compass that guides us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter”(Henry). My family has several different aspects that make us a “family”. Many times I have thought to myself that Family isn’t important, although I think about it a little harder and my mind completely changes. The overall theme of a family is different for every single person. Morals are just another example of how different families are. My family has shaped me into the person I am today. The impact on my family is a lasting aspect. Many people believe family is only blood and I can’t disagree with that statement more. Many different factors go into describing Family, and the theme, morals, and lasting impacts describe my family.

Family is one of the most important parts of life. When you have a piece of that missing, you always wonder what could be different. When I was little i always looked up to my uncles and my best friend was my papa. I wanted to do everything with them but because of my uncle’s job in the armed forces we didn’t see him as much as we liked but that made our time together even better. I would go everywhere with my papa and when my cousins were in North Carolina I wanted to do everything with them. I didn’t know that our family tree was just a little more complicated than I thought. It was something that would affect me forever.

As a little kid I have always saw my family come together at the dinner table at the end of the day and really get together and talk about all the gossip and what things still have to be done. That was the routine and I thought it was something we were always going to do till we die but I was wrong. As sad it is to admit that good things never last it seems like this was something I came to realize was slowly but surely dying off in tradition. So who is to blame the parents, children, or the industries and society because fast food easy and quick didn’t require a homemade meal so there is less time spent at home, in the kitchen, and at the dining table with your family.

The P#7 contributor, shared the dilemma of his education between his dad and mom during his education process that:

Most people think that their lives would be perfect if only certain conditions were met, or circumstances would turn in their favor. I know many of my friends would choose to be rich and famous. Others may choose simple things, like a new house or a car, even a better job. For me, my life would be perfect with these three things. To have more time with my family, have more love and less hate in the world.

My family mean the most to me. My family is everything to me, they have helped me get to where I am today and they will continue to help me grow and thrive. My family is not the average one mother one father one girl and one boy. My family has one dad, one mom, 4 girls and 2 boys. Plus a little dog that goes by the name Jingles. My family is not like other families, we have a 7 seater car and when all of us want to go we squeeze in. My family is really close too. I usually have people ask me if I get along with my siblings and I say Yes! Honestly the other day all 6 of us kids we sitting in the living room and my sister was tapping on her cup of juice with her ring and we all started to head bang, and just little dance moves in our seats on the couch. I don’t understand how most families don’t get along, yes, my family has fights and we get mad but at the end of the day these people will always love you and will always help you.