The Death Of A Old Child

Thank you for letting my go, for finally ending the pain you knew I had always felt when it came to loving you. I hope you were aware of how difficult it was for me to give you the type of love you so heavily demanded. I was only destroying myself, tearing my soul apart, piece by piece, just to put a smile on your face. Thank you for finally realizing that you have to work on yourself first. I am not and never was capable of doing that for you—no one else is. It was about time you'd decided to end the nights spent crying and the days spent fighting.

And then she turned to me. I felt special that she had saved me for last. I smiled at her, and she did the same to me. We had grown inseparable over the past few years especially, but now it was time to say goodbye. I knew at that point that nothing at all would change, that we would still be sisters, still be best friends, still be inseparable. Who cares if we’re 5 ½ hours away? This was us.

The short note read, “Dear Paisley, I know this may be hard to understand, but it’s for the best. This is the only place I could go. We will always be together, I love you. Love, Sarah”

The sky and all its beautiful colors are all that were running through my mind. I didn't notice it then, but that was the last day we ever had those moments not only there but back home too. I never expect for him to leave, which was foolish. He found happiness in the bottom of a drink, how couldn't alcohol take him? I realize we're all trying to kill that pain somehow. I didn't imagine his death would take a hold of my life, but in a way it did. You see he was the only close death, I experienced in my 17 years, before him I didn't think death would ever influence me, for it was just a life check everyone check off eventually. I took his death as unexplained for so long, all I had angry and unresolved feelings and they controlled a part of my life. I know that pain will always be there, but my life couldn’t stop, I couldn’t let this unresolved grief influence me as my uncles did. Although death is a sad thing, you have must choose whether to let it destroy oneself or sharpen it. I’m still on the path of understanding how life is after the death, still I remember he loved us and he isn’t sadden anymore, and that gives me joy and keeps on

As he closed his eyes, inhaling one last time, I repeated the only words that would form on my trembling lips: I promise. My father let out his final breath and passed away, leaving behind a monster for me to destroy, but also a peaceful smile, reassuring his faith in me and my ability to succeed in my fight against the opium

It’s so still here, so quiet, so peaceful. I walked past rows of gravestones as I finally approached the site where my relatives lay. To many, visiting their relatives in a cemetery can be a sad experience; I however, was happy for them, because they still gathered together as they had before. I smiled as I remembered those times, when I was but a child and I could just barely see over the table. I could hear their talking and laughter again. How warm and familiar it all was! I remembered how laughter would erupt after my father told a good joke – he was always telling jokes. I could even smell the feast my mother and aunts would cook for us, and could almost feel them slapping my hand as I tried to sneak a piece of turkey before the meal. I remembered sitting at the smaller table with my cousins and siblings, feeling as if I were too old to sit at the kid's table. I remembered feeling left out, as if the adults kept some kind of grown-up secret from me. That same feeling I felt again, as I stood there seeing them all lying as they used to sit, in those two long rows. Although I had grown to be an adult, they still seemed to keep some secret from me, one that I was not to know of yet, one that I am not ready yet to

“I’m sorry, my love,” I said as my eyes began to water. She grabbed her chest in pain and stared at me. Her eyes teared up and a single tear ran down her cheek as she took her final breath. I did what I had done so many times before, but I never felt any remorse for my actions until then.

“Your mother and I are getting divorced. This does not change how much we each love the two of you. Things around here will be changing but our love for you both does not.” Immediately after I heard those first seven words, I ran down the hallway to my room and slammed the door behind me. I had no idea how the two people I loved

Today was funeral day. My mom’s funeral. It was a dark October thursday, the clouds were brewing a storm. A slight breeze disturbed my neck. My uncomfortable suit sleeves bellowed in the cold breeze.. I hadn’t felt any emotions since the day of her death, which was weeks ago, almost as if my emotion is grey. It was warm then, as my mind was too. Nowadays, up until today, my mind has been a dark fog, as if my mind was released into the sky, darkening everyone’s day, arriving at my mom’s funeral or just to cuddle up with their friends and family in front of a warm crackling fire, telling the stories of their childhood and how times were better. Not me, my dad usually ignored me and he only worked on managing my mom’s fortune. Yeah. My mom’s

I’ve preserved thee with the warmth of my heart, I long for the embrace with arms spread wide apart. These’re unspoken words smeared with my tears, I’ve colour’d thee not just in days but years. I’ve told whatever I have to tell you; It’s to you whether to accept or bid adieu.

It was the Thursday prior to that dreadful Saturday, we were at our soccer practice. It was decided that we would play the whole practice so Larissa and I were named captains of our respective teams and then selected our teams. It was a solid game with equally matched teams and although my team ended up on top, it could have gone either way. After training, we walked to our parent's cars laughing and joking and I spoke the last words I would ever say to her, “bye, love you”. As I reflected on this, it made me feel better to know that I had told Larissa that I loved her as a friend and respected her as a soccer player.

The night was long. The event ended at midnight, but we all decided to go grab a drink together. We continued to discuss our lives, sharing our favourite moments during the last 25 years. We made some promises to keep in touch with each other, but in reality those promises probably won’t last more than a year. After a couple hours passed, we all said our goodbyes. My wife and I headed back to the hotel, we had to get up early for the flight back to Utah. I slept well knowing everyone was doing alright, but I still wondered how time could go by so fast. Until next time,

I clearly remember the day I found out about my granddad's passing. I was at school. It was a normal, joyful day. My dad was planning on picking me up, but instead my friend's mom picked me up. He would not tell me why, but I did not think much of it. I remember the car ride to my house. My friend's mom would not tell me why she was driving me home; all she told me was, "Just know, Ryan, that we will be here for you no matter

Well, I have come to the end of my rope and you’re still there. The darkness has surrounded me, but your reflection I still see. I have graced many distinct roses of love, but none were ever as beautiful as you.

After so long apart you are still able to put me at ease and when your hand reached out to hold mine, I realized that I had found my future, my soul-mate and the love that I had always dreamed of discovering again after I lost that it so long ago. We spoke for hours about every possible subject and never ran out of words to say to each other.