Short Story Paper (3)

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May 14, 2024

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Murshida 1 Khadiza Murshida Professor Kivari EN-101-IS2 8 October 2023 Parenting in Crisis: An Analysis of "Teenage Wasteland" (Longer paper, topic #1, pg. 1932) Parenting is explored beyond family dynamics in Anne Tyler's "Teenage Wasteland," delving into the profound impact of parental choices on adolescent development. The narrative skillfully unfolds the obstacles and consequences of modern parenting through the eyes of the Coble family, focusing on the main character, the teenage boy Donny. This story not only navigates the characters' immediate struggles, but also prompts reflection on the broader societal implications of modern parenting. Tyler's writing captures the delicate balance between nurturing and autonomy, providing readers with an engrossing exploration of love, identity, and the intricate dance of parent-child relationships. "Teenage Wasteland" is a universal commentary on the difficulties of guiding adolescents through the turbulent journey of self-discovery. The parenting styles that Daisy and Matt approach for Donny significantly impact his behavior and development. Daisy’s parenting style can be considered authoritarian, the traditional model of parenting in which parents make the rules and children are expected to be obedient (Lumen Learning, 263). There is often little communication between parent and child,

Murshida 2 with the child almost having no say. Children raised under this parenting style often do not have good relationships with their parents, and are more likely to rebel as teenagers, as we can see in Donny. Daisy's controlling temperament manifests itself in her obsessive focus on Donny's academic achievements. Her high standards are frequently communicated through explicit orders, strict rules, and a relentless emphasis on excellence. She has high academic expectations for Donny, expecting him to excel in every subject and extracurricular activity. Daisy's parenting style is defined by her desire for control and her conviction that pushing Donny to his limits will ensure his future success. On the other hand, Matt’s parenting style can be defined as permissive parenting. In this parenting style, parents act more as friends to their children and do not provide structure or boundaries. Children crave structure, and having a lack thereof leads to resentment and poorer relationships with parents. They may fail to learn self-discipline and may feel somewhat insecure because they do not know the limits (Lumen Learning, 263). Matt’s approach suggests a willingness to let Donny find his own way, possibly motivated by a desire to foster independence. His approach is distinguished by a sense of non-interference, giving Donny the liberty to make decisions and live with the consequences of his choices. Daisy's high expectations, combined with Matt's passive attitude, make for a difficult environment for Donny. The pressure to meet his mother's academic standards collides with his father's lack of support or guidance. Donny is confused and frustrated as he navigates conflicting messages about the importance of academic achievement and the expectations placed on him because of this dynamic.

Murshida 3 Daisy's relentless pursuit of perfection causes him to struggle with self-esteem, as Cal tells Daisy when speaking to her a few times. Mark Leary (1998, 2004b, 2007) believes that self- esteem is similar to a fuel gauge. Relationships enable surviving and thriving, so the self-esteem gauge alerts us to threatened social rejection, motivating us to act with greater sensitivity to others’ expectations (Myers & Twenge, 40). Donny may constantly feel the need to meet or exceed his mother's expectations in order to gain approval and validation. On the other hand, Matt's casual response may cause Donny to question the importance of academic success altogether. He internalizes conflicting beliefs about his abilities and self-worth as a result of this parenting dynamic and Donny himself states that he does not trust that his parents have faith in him to do better. In the absence of a balanced and supportive approach, he struggles to develop a healthy self-concept and resilience in the face of difficulties and challenges. The lack of communication in the family has a substantial effect on parenting, and how that parenting affects Donny’s behavior. According to Smith et al. (2009), a family that has positive family communication will be better able to alter their cohesion and flexibility to meet developmental and situational demands that arise, whereas family system with poor communication tends to have lower functioning regarding cohesion and flexibility (Hess). Throughout the story, it becomes clear that Daisy and Matt, despite living under the same roof, have fundamentally misaligned perspectives on their son, Donny. Daisy's domineering personality and her relentless pursuit of academic success for Donny, conflict with Matt's casual approach. This contradictory parental vision is exacerbated by a failure to engage in open and

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