As I read the chapter about attachment in the book, I was fairly certain about the category I fell under. As Tai began talking about attachment in lecture, my hunch was solidified in my mind. I took the attachment quiz, which affirmed my beliefs. I am insecurely attached, specifically anxiously attached. At first, I didn’t really understand what caused my attachment style, I just knew that I identified the most with it. I find it very difficult to open up to others, although I often would like to. I seek approval regularly and need to be reminded that I am still loved. I tend to worry about relationships excessively. I feel as though I am almost a textbook case of insecure attachment. I knew that I was insecurely attached, but I really struggled to understand why for several weeks. I have two parents who love me very much. When I was very young, they practically doted on me and gave me more than enough attention. They fulfilled my needs and my wants. I haven’t experienced any traumatic life events that would have changed my attachment style. So I was left wondering, how and why am I insecurely attached? What could have happened in my early childhood to cause this insecure attachment. It was during the discussion before the first quiz that it hit me. We were spending class time reviewing confusing concepts. Many people were asking questions that I had not thought of about attachment. For the duration of the review session, Molly made one point stand out to me very clearly:
Research has revealed that there is a strong relationship between insecure attachment and a history of abuse and neglect (Begle, Dumas & Hanson, 2010). Insecure attachments are formed due to parenting stress and abusive parenting behavior. Parenting stress and abusive parenting behavior form children’s mental schemas of how the world works based upon early interactions with caregivers. These mental schemas construct their expectations about relationships. Ultimately
Each attachment style is divided along two dimensions – the fear of abandonment and the fear of closeness. Bartholomew and Horowitz define fear of abandonment as the model of self which describes the belief of an individual to be either “worthy of love and support or not” (1991). They also define fear of closeness as the model of other which describes an individual’s
An infant avoids connection with the caregiver, as when the infant seems not to care about the caregiver's presence, departure, or return.
Attachment is an emotional bond that is created between one person to another across a life span. Attachment can be a connection between two individuals, but it is a bond that involves a regular contact with that person and also expressed distress when separated from that person. Also, attachment can play an important role during childhood, adolescent and romantic relationships. Attachment tends to be enduring and meaningful because it can last for a long time between people. However, being attached can motivate children to stay close to people that they love. Attachment can also help people build emotional bond between each others, that can have a secure base so that people can safely explore their environment. Although studies have shown that children who are securely attached can also develop an increase of independence and confidence. Meanwhile, children who are not securely attached can develop risks such as poor internal working models in life.
Attachment refers to the degree to which an individual is close to non-deviant others, including, family members, friends and peers. One’s willingness to conforming to norms and expectations is dependent on how attached they are to others. This element goes on to extends
Three predominant styles of attachment, secure, insecure-anxious and insecure-avoidant reflect expectations about the reliability and availability of attachment figures (Hazan & Shaver, 1987). Individuals who portray secure attachment styles tend to value relationships that provide trust, comfort, and availability. In contrast, individuals with insecure-avoidant or insecure-anxious styles of attachment have difficulty recognizing, acknowledging, and/or valuing secure-based relationships. Avoidant individuals experience discomfort when becoming close with others. In contrast, insecure-anxious individuals report relationships as a threat,
After taking the quiz, I was surprised to find that I have a secure attachment style. I personally do not think how I was raised contributed to this at all. The way I was raised was very avoidant. My parents didn't encourage me and I did not share my feelings with them often, or at all. I was constantly afraid of being made fun of by them so I didn't share my opinions or thoughts very often. I did not like it when they were mad at me, so I would try my very best to always be on my best behavior. I have been with my boyfriend for almost four years though and I feel like that has really effected my attachment style. He is very supportive and is aware of my needs to be reassured, so I do not often worry about him leaving me or not paying close
“ (The Strange Situation). Based on the results of the Strange Situation, Ainsworth and her colleague identified three types of attachment styles, a secure attachment which composed a majority of the children in the experiment, insecure avoidant and ambivalent/resistant. For a child who has secure attachment can be “able to freely explore when the mother is around, interacts with the stranger when the mother is present but not when she is absent, shows distress when the mother leaves and is happy to see the mother return” (Mary Ainsworth). For a child that exhibits that inhibits “Anxious-Resistant Insecure Attachment is anxious to explore and is wary of the stranger even when the mother is present, is extremely distressed when the mother leaves, but is ambivalent when the mother returns. He will stay close to the mother upon her return, but will show resentment by resisting the mother's attention and pushing her away.” and for the child who inhibits “an Anxious-Avoidant Insecure Attachment will avoid or ignore the mother and show little emotion when his mother leaves and upon her
A psychological perspective of attachment is a term to describe a reciprocal emotional tie that develops over time. There are many developmental theories relating themselves to attachment and deprivation and many arguments over the nature-nurture debate. However, the name that comes to the forefront of most minds when speaking of this topic is
Attachment is the beginning of development for a healthy family system. Attachment or bonds are started very young they start with the parent and the child then it expands outward overdevelopment. There are four types of attachment styles avoidant, secure, ambivalent, and disorganized-disoriented. An attachment is a special bond and is usually positive between the child and usually the parents (Feldman, 2014, p.182). Out of the four attachments, secure attachment plays the most important in a healthy development of a child. Secure attachment is when a child and the caregiver such as the mother gives a secure foundation which the child feels like he/ she can explore the world around
“a way of conceptualising the propensity of human beings to make strong affectional bonds to particular others and of explaining the many forms of emotional distress and personality disturbance, including anxiety, depression, and emotional detachment, to which unwilling separation and loss give rise” (Bowlby, 1984 p.27).
It must be noted at this point there are strong links between these attachment categories and development theories. I think it’s’ worth briefly exploring these as it may affect understanding of how our client is thinking:
Although, I relate to some aspects of both secure and ambivalent attachment styles, I believe that my anxiety has caused me to mainly have an ambivalent attachment style. At a young age, I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder that has caused me to be timid and nervous in relationships. As someone with an ambivalent attachment style, I find it difficult to maintain a clear view of self, put myself in new social settings, and express myself around people. Even though I know that the Lord wants His followers to let go of worry and fellowship with one another, I feel held back by my attachment style and nerves. I do not believe that my attachment style originated as a result of limited independence during childhood,
At the beginning of the course the class was introduced the concept of attachment styles. Attachment styles are the types of behavior displayed in relationships shaped by a two-part set of basic assumptions, conclusion, or core beliefs about one’s self and others. In laymen’s terms it is how one person interacts with another either God, spouse, child, friend, or even self. There are four different types of attachment styles and they are: secure, ambivalent, disorganized, and secure. The relationship style that all should aspire to be a secure attachment style, however I would classify myself as having an ambivalent attachment style. This is the attachment style where I believe I am not worthy of love since I am flawed. It also takes the assumption that I will not be able to get the love I need without being angry or clingy.
An infant with a secure attachment style has a natural bond with their parent, where they are able to trust them, at the same time leaving their side to discover and explore their surroundings. In an insecure/resistant attachment the relationship the child has with their mother or caregiver is very clingy, thus making them very upset once the caregiver is away. When the mother or caregiver is back they are not easily comforted and resist their effort in comforting them. In an insecure/avoidant attachment the infant is, “indifferent and seems to avoid the mother, they are as easily comforted by a stranger, as by their parent” (Siegler 2011, p.429). Lastly, the disorganized/disoriented attachment is another insecure attachment style in which the infant has no way of coping with stress making their behavior confusing or contradictory. Through these brief descriptions of the attachment theory, many researchers have defined the turning point in which each attachment definition can have an influence on one’s self esteem, well-being and their marital relationship.